I Am Angry With My Husband: I Get Angry With My Husband Easily
If you're trying to get better at understanding men, then you would know that we don't like it when you get angry. I mean no one really likes it when anyone gets angry, but it tends to be a lot worse when women get angry since they have more emotional depth. Some women come close to exploding when they get angry, simply because the fear that their man would just get up and leave holds them back from unleashing their wrath. Ladies, you don't have to hold back anymore. Here are three ways my wife gets angry at me without making me feel like I can't tolerate her anymore.
1. Say It
This is a very sneaky technique that works with generally every emotion. By simply saying that you're angry, you actually become less angry. I think the idea is that you dissociate yourself from the emotion of anger by saying it.
This way, your man will still know that you're angry when you're talking to him and he will respect your feelings. It also allows your arguments to be resolved a lot faster, since you don't get caught up in the emotional side of arguing as much.
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2. The Cold Shoulder
This technique is tried and true. It causes men grief, since men know that their woman is angry at them when they are exposed to the cold shoulder. So it in fact does the opposite. It draws men closer to the woman when she's angry.
Of course, if you do this all the time you simply look like a sook, or a princess who's annoyed when she doesn't get her way. Reserve it for the times that you're truly angry and combine it with the "say it" principle and your man will be very attentive to your needs.
3. Put Away The Ammunition
I'm not talking about real bullets, of course. I am referring to the act of verbally hurting someone when you're angry. We all know this is a luxury that we can indulge in when we feel like the other person is getting on our nerves. However, for the purposes of arguing, it rarely does any good.
Attacks will make your man go away, but it will make it harder and harder for him to come back. So if you want to be angry, make sure this anger doesn't load up your verbal weapons.
If you're having trouble understanding men, don't take it out on him with verbal weapons. Simply say that you're angry, sort it out and diffuse the conflict. A bit of the good, old, cold shoulder never hurts either.
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Are you stressing constantly that your spouse is not happy with you? Is the thought of your spouse not being perfect bothering you? Are you trying to change too much about yourself or your spouse to create a perfect spouse so that you can have a perfect marriage?
If you answered any of the above questions with a 'yes', you are putting your marriage in harm's way by your own hands. Remember that stressing about becoming the perfect spouse or making your spouse perfect is in vain. In fact, your stress might lead to problems in your relationship.
So how can you kill the stress of becoming a perfect spouse yourself or trying to make your spouse perfect?
First of all, tell yourself there is no such thing as a perfect spouse. We as human beings are designed on purpose to be imperfect. None amongst us can be perfect, no matter how amazing we are. So accept it and move on.
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Talk about what bothers you about your spouse. Many times, your spouse is not actually aware of the habits that are bothering you. Also, you need to remember to accept criticism as well. If you feel that your spouse needs to make some changes, chances are that your spouse also wants you to make some changes in yourself. Ask them about what changes they feel you can make to better yourself. Remember, the changes suggested by both should be reasonable changes. Work together to better yourselves for each other.
Do not expect your spouse to give 100 percent all the time, while you stand at the sidelines judging them every-time they slip. Rather than criticizing or stressing, share workloads with each other to relieve each other of stress. For example, husbands can contribute in household chores and wives can help husbands by bringing in the grocery once in a while by themselves. Not expecting your spouse to do everything all the time and contributing with their tasks will bring you closer.
Stand in each other's shoes once in a while to understand each other better. If you will always react to situations based on your own viewpoint, then you will ignore your spouse's side of the story. This will add to stress and make your spouse the villain in your marriage.
Pursuing perfectionism in a marriage is dangerous. If you feel you are constantly trying to become the perfect spouse or are stressed by trying to make your spouse perfect, then you need to stop, take a deep breathe and remember why you chose your spouse to begin with..
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Perhaps you got married at a church full of family and friends, those who witnessed abundant love and bliss. Or maybe you skipped all the hoopla and tied the knot at the Justice of the Peace, just the two of you, same love, same bliss.
When people break up just to make up, that's called dating. Marriage isn't for people turned on by repetitive, petty arguments that escalate into fights. Marriage is for two mature adults, those who feel that their life is much better with the spouse than it is alone. Although some marriages have a lot loneliness and can make a person feel alone, that's something we'll explore at another time.
For now, let's just stick to those of you who think marriage is a joke and forgot that it is a job, your #1 job. Let me take some time to remind you of the quickest and best ways to wreck your marriage and get fired from the job, your #1 job.
13 Ways to Wreck Your Marriage
• Fight over any and everything.
• Constantly berate and degrade him as if you're talking to an enemy.
• Show ungratefulness for any and everything he does.
• Be lazy and lethargic.
• Let yourself go, meaning look the worst you can look on any given day. No, make that every day!
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• Be clueless about matters of HIS heart.
• Never kiss him in all those places that you know turn him on.
• Forget who's team you're playing on. Damn, just stop playing the game!
• Complain that your man doesn't earn enough money or brag about making more money than him.
• Cry at the drop of a hat and boo hoo often.
• Speak words of admiration about other men to your man, especially about their good looks and the big dollars they earn.
• Tell all your friends that your man isn't a real man.
• Stop having sex with him.
If you haven't already, start doing these things. Depending on how fast you want to quit your job, your #1 job, do all of these things every day for a month. Perhaps you were accustomed to calling in sick, taking extra long lunch breaks, leaving early and always trying to use vacation time. You'll be amazed at how fast your man will ignore you, forget he ever knew you, and find a replacement to do your job, your #1 job.
Don't be a fool. Married women, stay on your job and do it well.
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Divorce is always a difficult process for all the parties involved, the man, the woman, and the children, if any. A divorce can be a stressful experience because it is often met with uncertainties about the future. The children involved often experience negative effects like denial, anger, feelings of abandonment, blame, preoccupation with reconciliation, acting out and guilt.
Couple's therapy offers an effective channel of resolving problems between couples, and averting divorce. The process involves sitting down the couples with a professional in order to discuss their feelings and thoughts. The goal of therapy is to help partners gain a deeper understanding of themselves, in order to help them determine if they need to make any changes. The grounds, under which therapy is required, include:
Poor communication
Communication is often pegged on how a statement is said and not what is said. When the communication between couples has deteriorated, the process of getting it back on track can prove difficult. Negative communication often leaves one or both of the partners feeling depressed, disregarded, insecure and/or seeking to withdraw from the conversation.
Furthermore, negative communication can include a mode of communication that leads to nonverbal communication, as well as emotional and physical abuse.
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Tolerating each other
Couples do not have to do everything together to be in a proper relationship. The problem arises when one or both partners feel as if they are tied down to a relationship that they would rather not be in. Couples who feel like roommates as opposed to married couples need to seek for proper counseling.
Couples who are just sharing the same space lack proper conversation, communication and intimacy. A skilled clinician plays an important role pinpointing the problem and recommending the best way to restore the relationship.
Extra-marital affairs
When any of the partners has been involved or is considering having an affair, it is important to give therapy a chance. Getting over an affair can be difficult, but is not impossible. It calls for a willingness and commitment to forgive and advance forward. As long as both parties are honest and committed to the process of therapy, the relationship can be salvaged.
Unable to resolve differences
Partners who are unable to resolve their differences amicably should consider professional help. Many times, couples know what is troubling their marriage, but are unable to fix the problem. Therefore, professional help comes handy. A skilled clinician will help to get the couples advancing in the right direction by offering practical solutions. Furthermore, when couples disagree or argue, breaks can prove helpful. However, when the break turns into a night away from home or a short separation, this calls for urgent mediation.
Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.
You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.
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