I'm Not Happy In My Marriage: Living In An Unhappy Marriage

Every living thing needs love and nurturing to grow. The same is true with your marriage. Most people only give consideration to their marriage when they are experiencing marriage problems, but when their marriage is going along okay, they put their focus onto something else in their lives. Following the problems with solutions is not an effective way to keep your marriage healthy and strong.

Both your spouse and your marriage require attention on an ongoing basis to help it be healthy. Don't wait until there is a problem happening to turn your attention to the marriage. You should spend the time every day to nurture your relationship. Below is some simple advice about helping everything stay happy.

Verbalize Your Love. It's important to all people to know they are loved and this especially goes doubly true for spouses. Every day say something about your love for them. Kind Acts. Try to find a way to do something kind for your spouse. It may be just letting them sleep in and keeping noise down but do something to show you care. Avoid Fights. There are always times when you'll disagree, but try to get to the real reason and resolve it.

Respect Each Other. Respecting each other as a person and respect for the marriage is essential, be polite, talk with kindness. Pull Together. You may have differing approaches to common issues as to running a household or raising children, but if you try to work together it will be more beneficial. The house will run smoother and so will your marriage.

With all this it's obvious you need to give the energy and time to your partner on an ongoing basis. Let them know what you think and feel, and to how they're feeling. Maintain the communication and sharing to maintain your marriage for a long, long time in a happy way.

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Marriage is really what you make it to be so I have listed some help in marriage advice for you to make your marriage better. If only one of these helps you improve your thinking and marriage then I will live happily ever after.

A- Always treat your spouse better than you want to be treated.

B- Before you go to bed angry, try to make up with your spouse.

C- Call your spouse from time to time just to say "I love you".

D- Don't ever assume that your marriage is great. Make sure your spouse feels the same way.

E- Every now and then take some time for yourselves and do something you enjoyed doing when you first started dating or even from your younger days.

F- Find ways to surprise your spouse with an unexpected act of kindness.

G- Greet your spouse with a hug and a kiss at a minimum in the morning and night.

H- Have intimate relations as often as one of you desires.

I- Include your spouse in important decisions and conversations.

J- Just say no to being a workaholic and missing precious time with your spouse and family.

K- Keep your spouse and marriage as your top priority and make sure others respect that.

L- Love your spouse by respecting, honoring and being the best better half that you can be.

M- Make your spouse feel appreciated by telling them every so often.

N- Never flirt or give the impression to anyone that you are not committed to your spouse.

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O- Only argue with your spouse if it's going to refine and make your marriage and relationship better when it's all over.

P- Practice humility and forgiveness and instantly improve your marriage.

Q- Quit complaining about non important matters. If you make a big deal about everything your spouse will never know what really matters to you.

R- Refuse to let the romance take a back seat in your marriage. It will help in marriage and prevent someone else from trying to help you out in this area by having an affair with you or your spouse.

S- Stay in tune with what's going on in your spouse's life (work or home). No one should know more about your spouse's needs, wants and frustrations than you.

T- Treat your spouse like a Princess or Prince.

U- Understand that you get out of marriage what you put into it.

V- Voice your concerns on matters that are important to you. Don't wait until your blood is boiling before addressing something that's bothering you.

W- Work out your problems with your spouse and don't bring others into the picture unless you absolutely need to in order to improve your marriage.

X- X-Ray your marriage and find the little things that are stopping you from growing closer together. Get rid of them.

Y- Yearn to be the type of spouse who makes their spouse be the best that he or she can be.

Z- Zip your lip if you don't have anything nice to say to your spouse.

Marriage can be interesting, challenging and lovely all in the same day. I hope you can take this marriage help advice and use some of them to help you and your spouse have a better marriage.

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Many articles are written about how to get a 'JAMAICAN MAN', but it is also extremely important to know how to maintain the relationship and keep the man in your life. Many Jamaican men are afraid of taking the step towards marriage because they feel " THE WOMAN CHANGES ONCE SHE GETS THE RING ". Yes, sometimes women take things for granted and some women are very immature in their actions, however, most times poor communication and misunderstanding are the main culprits that lead to the road of separation. Below are some of the things women need to keep in mind to maintain a great marriage to a Jamaican man.

1) LISTEN- The first year in a marriage is " THE GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER YEAR". It is the year you get to learn the most about your partner. Although you will continue to learn about him as the years go by, the first year is when you are most taken aback by his different moods and actions, re-actions and general personality. Jamaican men basically communicate more during the dating stage and the beginning of marriage. LISTEN WELL and ask questions if you are not sure. Women who do not listen well and/or do not pay much attention to what he says, you will miss out and suffer the consequences later. He will shut down after he feels you are not very sensitive to his needs or desires(not that he is selfish, but he thinks if you love him you will try to do the things he likes). Most Jamaican men are extremely family oriented and will not be quick to get a divorce, however he can totally shut down while remaining in the matrimonial home. The Jamaican man will tell you his likes and dislikes but he will not repeat himself constantly!! So remember ladies, our first line of duty is to LISTEN!! He will certainly not have the same discussion over and over!

2) COMMUNICATE- The next step to have a great marriage to a Jamaican man is to learn to communicate well. Our Jamaican men are not the most patient of men and will get frustrated very easily. You however can have him loving you even more and wanting to be around you more if he feels connected and free to be himself. It is very important for a woman not to attack her husband when he says something she does not like or approve of. It is extremely hard sometimes to control our emotions but it is very important to do so. Never sweep bad feelings under the carpet, just choose the appropriate time to talk. Most discussions can be had in the bedroom, just before bed (especially if kids are in the home). Try never to go to bed angry with each other. If the problem needs more time to solve it, make a date to do so, going out for a drink, dinner or even a walk, can be a very relaxing way to talk more and come to an understanding with disagreements. The main thing is to give each other time to talk while the other listens. Put yourself in the other partner's shoe and ask " how would I feel"? Getting respect from his woman is at the top of a Jamaican man's list. Never talk to a Jamaican man as if you are in charge, always be submissive, however have it all together. Know exactly what you want and stick to the point (Do not keep straying on things he did the months before).

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3) BE A GREAT HOMEMAKER- A Jamaican man takes pride in his home. His home is his castle where he is the king and likes to have peace. Home is where he comes to re-charge, relax and be himself. He does not like to come home and have to face an argument or a disgruntled face. He enjoys coming home to a beautifully put together woman with welcoming arms who is happy to see him. Jamaican men enjoys coming home to a very clean house and also appreciate a delicious mea l. They like a wife who cooks well and entertains well. This practice is his idea of having an excellent homemaker and wife. He also likes it when his wife cares a great deal for his health

4) FIND OUT HIS SLEEP ROUTINE- One very important thing couples need to look out for "what time clock is your partner on ". This is not taken into consideration by many and has caused many separations. Some people are morning people, which means they are more alive, alert and vibrant in the mornings. The morning person gets up very early in the mornings and can sometimes be insensitive to the sleeping needs of the other person. They sometimes feel the need to discuss some very important things early in the morning, which would at that time not be processed properly by the other spouse who is trying to sleep or relax in bed. Sometimes the feeling of rejection can start to brew if one partner's conversation is taken lightly in this case, or if their sexual advance and desires are brushed aside. The same thing happens when one partner is a night person and the other is not, The night person might feel like he/she is being rejected, not getting enough attention and not being loved ultimately. Once this part of the relationship is sorted out and couples can compromise, a huge weight can be lifted off the shoulders of the marriage.

5) LOOK OUT FOR HIM- Jamaican men like it when their women "HAVE THEIR BACKS". Never discuss him in a negative way with your best friends or family members. Never crack jokes about him in a negative light or expose his downfalls to others. This lets him feel less of a man and not comfortable around you. If your partner is the type of person who likes the spotlight, say things to uplift him, when around others. Pay attention to his interests, hobbies and goals in life, be supportive at all times. Always let it be known to him and others that you are on his side. Always wait until you get home to let him know if you totally disagree with him on a particular matter.

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6) LET HIM BE THE MAN- Jamaican men like to be in charge of the family. Their actions might not show it at times, but they have the need to constantly" WEAR THE PANTS". They are usually filled with pride and cares what people think of them regarding being the head of the house. Let him have equal input on major decisions regarding the house, the family and finance. Be affectionate and gentle to him, yet strong and assertive when the need arise. The Jamaican, man although he likes to be in charge loves a strong woman.

7) MAINTAIN YOUR APPEARANCE- Like every other man, the Jamaican man is very proud when his wife "FIXES UP HERSELF" (looks good all the time)After all, it was one of the reason he was first attracted to you! Even when finances are not up to scratch, groom your hair in an attractive fashion, take the time to wear some make up and wear clothes that fits well. Many women tend to eat more during stressful times and therefore put on weight, never go out and buy new clothes to fit into after a weight gain. Work out at the gym or take long walks to shed those extra pounds!! Always maintain good hygiene, wear his favourite perfumes and ALWAYS, ALWAYS wear great lingerie.

8) INTIMACY - The lock to a great marriage! Every thing else can close that door but if you really want a secure and firm relationship, the extra bolt on that door would be great intimacy with him. A Jamaican man enjoys extra attention and will get it from somewhere!! So make sure it comes from you!!Intimacy does not start in the bedroom!! always remember, you have to make him feel like the man, be the sexiest you can be, listen to him, communicate well, have his back, be a great homemaker and you will have his heart. Let him feel you submit to him, look in his eyes with great passion when you talk to him and remind him you are his baby(no matter how old you are). When a Jamaican man feels he can trust you and there is passion he will give himself, his heart and his soul to you. Sex is of utmost importance to the Jamaican man, however when it comes to his special woman he prefers the term" making love". Love making is the ultimate gift between a man and his wife, the Jamaican man has no reservation when it comes to that special time. When a Jamaican man is happy and content he can create heaven here on earth for you.

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