My Husband Cheated On Me But Says He Loves Me: Is My Husband Going To Be Content With Our Marriage After His Affair

Forgiving someone for cheating on you is never an easy task. The feelings of hurt, betrayal and seemingly endless pain can get in the way of honest healing. In this article, I will cover some of the requirements for forgiveness to begin, followed by true understanding and healing.

First of all, the person who cheated needs to be remorseful. if they don't regret what they have done, there is no way you can forgive them, far less have a happy relationship with them.

The cheating partner has to be able to give all the details about the affair. By being able to answer all of the questions that the betrayed partner will ask, you begin to build a subliminal sense of trust by being completely honest at this point.

In addition to disclosing all the details of the affair, the cheating partner needs to have their life as an open book. No secrets at all. The other partner needs to be able to know where they are at any time. You should be able to call them and find them exactly where they said they would be. If this is not possible, rebuilding nay sense of trust will also not be possible.

An affair is often times a wake up call for your marriage. It is a symptom of an injured or sick marriage that needs time and attention to heal. Find out what the deeper issues are that have been plaguing your marriage and pushing one of you to find whats been missing elsewhere.

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If you are at the stage in your relationship that you are wondering whether you will still be together in a few years then you also may be asking yourself how to save my marriage. When you made those vows to each other that wonderful day you joined together for better or worse. When the "worse" happens you can get through it, but only if you work on it together. Problems happen but you cannot resolve them on your own.

Here are 5 great tips to help save your marriage and bring you closer together in a lasting relationship:

- Marriages made in Heaven? - Not likely! Even though no marriage is perfect you can have a loving intimate relationship with your spouse when you learn to accept each other and love each other unconditionally. No one person is perfect and your marriage will not be either but you can make the most of it. Accept that your marriage road will up and down.

- Marriages do not work by themselves - Your marriage will not be a great one by itself. It takes effort and commitment on both your parts to make your relationship strong. The more effort you put into it the more likely you are to build a loving and intimate relationship based on trust and respect. Being respectful and courteous with each other is extremely important and without these your relationship can founder.

- Marriages require good communication and listening skills - Making quality time to talk with each other about issues and actively listening objectively is vital to working through everyday problems. Share your feelings and avoid blaming, but instead focus on identifying the issue or issues and then find solutions together. Be open and honest with each other and find a common ground where the solution works for both of you. You also need to spend time together sharing thoughts, feelings, dreams and desires with each other, which will help take your marriage to a deeper level of intimacy.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

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- Marriages grow strong on forgiving and forgetting - Whenever you have made a mistake apologize and put it right, and when you have been hurt, forgive your lover and forget the offence. Holding onto grudges or becoming resentful over past hurts or misunderstandings will only serve to undermine your marriage. Look at the good things in your relationship and build on that.

- Marriages need kindness and giving - When you live with another person it is easy to begin to take them for granted or not treat them with the same kindness and generosity of spirit as people you see less often. The exact opposite is true. When you live closely with someone you profess to love dearly, you especially need to show them kindness and be giving toward each other. Making your spouse feel loved and special to you, will help the two of you become closer and strengthen your bond together. If you are unsure how you can show your mate that you care about them and want to do something for them, ask them what you can do for them. The simplest things can mean the most, and it is not generally the big things that will make or break a relationship, but the little things.

If, after you have applied the above and you still ask yourself how to save my marriage, then perhaps seeing a counselor will help, but only if you both agree to go. If only one of you works on your relationship then things are that much harder, your chance of success is reduced and you run the risk of burning yourself out.

However, if the two of you really want to make your marriage work, then a counselor can certainly help you both achieve your goal when a third person's unbiased professional guidance is needed. Sometimes, having another point of view is all it takes to be able to see your situation from a different perspective and so find the right solution.

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Have you ever wondered why some couples, appear to be madly in-love even after being married for a long while and others have marriage problems? Have they figured out a secret or are they faking it you wonder because your marriage doesn't seem like it's headed down the same road because of your marriage problems.

Well, I would like to share with you some of the things that can keep your marriage from being long lasting and blissful and they are as follows;

Playing Mind Games

Remember back in elementary or high school how cool it was to try and manipulate or mess with the mind and heart of someone you liked or disliked very much. Unfortunately, some of those same games stayed with folks and are now creating marriage problems.

Here are some examples of game playing and perhaps you are guilty from time to time participating in them;

- If he or she isn't talking to me then I'm not talking either. Let's see how long we can go without talking to each other.

- If I can't have what I want then we won't be spending any intimate time together.

- I'll flirt with folks when we are hanging out to make him or her jealous and appreciate me more.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

- If he or she doesn't get along with my family then I don't want to be around his or her family.

Playing mind and heart games with your spouse is dangerous and will hurt your marriage. If you are guilty of these or others please stop now and avoid serious marriage problems.

Suffering From the "I" and "Mine" Mentality

Going back to the younger days of life (toddler stage) have you noticed that some kids are able to share and play nice while others fuss, fight and cry because they believe everything is "mine, mine and mine"?

Now unfortunately some spouses have never gotten over the fact that in-order to have growth in their marriage and avoid certain marriage problems, they have to turn in the "I" and pick up the "We".

If you want a marriage that lasts then it's vital that selfishness is replaced with unselfishness. It only takes a little control and effort to make the change from always thinking about your needs to making the needs of your spouse top priority.

Trust me you can still be happy if you can't ditch the "mine" mentality but you will probably be divorced at some point because of your marriage problems.

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As family members of God, marriage is not just a union of man and woman but also a holy and loving bond of husband and wife based on core principles of commitment, honor and respect. Having said that, here are more marriage saving tips for Christians wanting to get married.

As Christians, husband and wife not only share their martial responsibilities but pledge to God and his holy family as in their church as well. They communicate with each other, read bible, pray together, attend churches and cell meetings together. Doing these helps them to avoid other activities which may led to extra-martial affairs.

Still problems may arise in marriages due to difference of opinions. Those are challenges to test their love for each other. If you are facing conflicts, you should put in all efforts to save your marriage as divorce and separation are strictly forbidden in Christianity.

The reason is that these two can affect them personally, financially and emotionally especially if they have children. As husband and wife or parents, they need to reflect upon their faults and accept each other as they are rather than expecting what each other to be. They should stop being defensive, egotistic and blaming each other.

Compared to non-believers, it is much easier for them to mend their relationship cracks as they have the support of their cell group members whom they address as brothers and sisters as well as cell leaders and church pastors.

They are able to confide their problems easily and honestly since they knew these are the essential qualities required from them as sons and daughters of God. In return, their cell members, leaders and pastors will do everything they can to help them as in counselling and prayers.

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Marriage is a lifetime commitment. It is not just buying gifts, dating, hugging, kissing and telling your partner how much you love him or her but proving your love through actions.

But even so, it is very easy to act positively when things are going well. But when things are not going well, that is when our patience and commitment are being put to the severe test by God.

If you can show your love to your partner even when things are not going well and your partner acknowledges, that is true love. That is what God wants. To accept, help and love each other through good and bad times.

It is very easy to read this sentence and tell yourself that you can do it without any problems. But whether you are able to do it when the real test comes is another issue. Talk is cheap. It is action that matters most.

Marriage commitment from Christians are much higher than non Christians since they know exactly what they should and should not do. By breaking their marriage vows, they are also breaking their vows to God.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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Author's Bio: 

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There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your spouse back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... Visit Save The Marriage to find out more.

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