My Husband Says I Am A Burden: My Husband Told Me He's No Longer In Love With Me - My Husband Called Me A Burden

Any marriage has its ups and downs and it is up to the people in the marriage to make things work. At times things do get a little monotonous and this monotony can make couples drift apart. If your husband is complaining of being bored in the relationship then here is what you should be doing.

Set out some alone time
When people get married they fall into the rut of marriage and forget that apart from being married they have also been lovers at a time. You need to reignite the flame in your marriage by setting aside the household chores and taking out some 'us' time.

Give him some time out
Women also tend to drag men into domesticity constantly controlling what they should and should not be doing. It is good to give your man a break and give him some time out from the routine of marriage. Let him treat that as his alone time and do as he wants. He will be a lot more refreshed and interested in you and the relationship after.

Take a break
Nothing beats boredom better than a nice luxurious holiday. Plan a quick getaway for just the two of you where you can relax and get away from everything predictable.

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Get some change in the way you look
You should also take a look at the way you look. Get some drastic change in the way you dress, buy some lingerie and get a new hair color. The change in your external appearance will definitely get the boredom out.

Get the fire blazing
Sex becomes a chore in a marriage. Make your man feel desired by getting the fires in your bedroom blazing. Experiment, wear sexy lingerie, try massage oils etc and see him get back into the groove.

Be nice and understanding with him
Often married couple begin talking at each other and forget being nice. Change this trend and start communicating better with him. Learn to make interesting conversation that he would like to be a part of. Take the help of a counselor if the need arises. Once the communication between the two of you improves you will be able to find a way out of this boredom.

Begin flirting with him
When we are in a relationship we tend to flirt a lot. But this stops once we get married. Bring back the spark in your relationship and learn to flirt with your husband. This will make him feel wanted and appreciated by you and will definitely cut his boredom.

Pay Close Attention Here-

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I'll give you a little hint: Your husband absolutely DOES still love you! He is confused right now and doesn't understand his feelings. And because of his confusion he doesn't know how to express what he feels. In this article I'll tell you how to save your marriage and get his love back, before it's too late!

First of all, let me just start off by saying that I am NOT a marriage counselor or a therapist. I'm a regular guy who has experienced first-hand what you are going through right now. And the pain and frustration I felt was overwhelming at the time! Fear not, the worst is behind you. When you begin to get control of your emotions and put yourself in a more resourceful state, you will begin to save your marriage.

Your husband is not feeling the same way he used to about your marriage. The two of you together created an environment which you both loved being in and that's why you got married. Something in this environment changed for him and more than likely, he doesn't even know what that change is. All he knows is that something is different, and he has interpreted his confusion as not being in love anymore.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

Traditional marriage counselors only have about a 20% success rate at saving marriages, which might explain why the divorce rate is so high! When my wife told me a few years ago that she didn't love me and wanted a divorce I knew I had to do something, because everything else I had tried had failed. Then almost by accident I found an approach that offered me a step by step set of instructions and worked even though she wasn't participating!

"My husband doesn't love me anymore", you say? There are things you must do and say and specific ways you must behave that will begin to change your husband's perception of the marriage. There are also critical mistakes you must avoid if you want to save your marriage. Time is not on your side and it is critical that you begin taking action right away! It's been proven time and again that the longer you wait in these situations, the less likely you can save your marriage.

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A man attended his son's graduation ceremony but was disappointed because though the son did very well, he did not win any prize as the best student in any of his courses. This really infuriated the father who started to mock his son who sat beside him. Anytime the name of the best student in any course was called, the father will stand up, clap and say, "That is a great son, unlike some ordinary ones" referring to his son.

He did this throughout the ceremony and it made the son feel very bad.

As they were going back home in the father's rickety car, anytime a good car overtook them, the boy will jump up, clap his hands and say, "That is a great father, unlike some ordinary men with rickety cars". This really got the father annoyed, but he realized that he initiated the cycle. In fact, he had to beg the child to stop talking and he apologised for his mistakes.

A mate you do not accept you cannot respect. Accepting each other is a strong foundation for a solid marriage; it is the first course in the school of marital success. You cannot respect a mate you fail to accept.The grass always look greener on the other side of the fence".

Unless you make up your mind to accept your spouse, you will always end up in bitter whenever you are together.

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A set of teenagers were given a plain sheet of paper to write out the things they do not like about their bodies. Some of them wrote "I'm too short", some "I'm too tall", "my breast is too big", "my breast is too small", "I'm too slim", "I'm too fat". The pastor that came to teach them about self-esteem, with their permission, read it to their hearing.

It shocked all the "fat" girls that the slim girls want to be fat, while the slim girls were surprised that fat girls want to be like them. The minister then told them, "you are good the way you are, it is only that the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence".

There is no better wife like your wife, there is no man more handsome than your husband. Please believe me. Anybody that is shorter than your husband is too short, anybody that is taller than your wife is too tall; your wife is the most beautiful girl in the world. Just believe me and you will see your marriage coming out of the woods.

One thing that baffles me about marriage is that the things that attracted people to their spouses before marriage are the same things they complain about when they get married.

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THREENESS IN MARRIAGE: Why is it that so many relationships struggle and ultimately breakdown?

ANSWER: the core of the issue is a lack of commitment, given that marriage really is a series of day-after-day commitments - every single day. Even to the point that a couple can put a bad day behind them and start afresh. The essence of biblical marriage can be summarised in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12... where there is unity there is strength... and the unity of two is never stronger when they both abide in God-the third strand of a cord that is not easily broken. Marriage is a choice to join to another person, so your own needs are no longer primary - theirs are, as far as you're personally concerned. Marriage is its best when both partners do this.

IDEALISM: Why do relationships falter then?

ANSWER: both partners need to be realistic and committed to making the relationship work. Idealism sets up expectations that can't possibly be satisfied. It only leads to frustration for both partners. At core, idealism is about my needs being met. It never thinks in terms of unity or partnership.

KNOWING OUR PARTNER: you say that knowing our partner is essential to a satisfying relationship. When we marry don't we know our partner enough already?

ANSWER: my experience suggests that we cannot truly know our partner until we've spent years together-living together, day by day, negotiating the cut and thrust of conflict, learning to seek to understand them, to forgive them, to accept them as they are.

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Until we know our partner we seek to change them. We should never seek to change them. Our challenge is we must accept them. That's very often a learning process. It takes time. It takes patience. So, when we finally accept our partner, and no longer need to change them, we know them. Then our partner feels safe in the marriage. Both partners need to feel safe, accepted and acceptable in marriage. Our number one objective in marriage should be for our partner to feel safe in the relationship - safe so, in their person, they can flourish.

SEEING CONFLICT AS AN OPPORTUNITY: Conflict is an opportunity to show how committed we are. But we only make the moment into an opportunity when we see it for what it is and then we can overcome our pride. Conflict is an opportunity to gain understanding and wisdom about our partner and ourselves.

OVERLOOKING OFFENSES: Ultimately, marriage - in the normal marriage - may well be about the daily commitment and practice of overlooking offenses (Proverbs 19:11). That's the land flowing with milk and honey in marriage.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

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