My Husband Treats Me Like A Roommate: How To Deal With An Unaffectionate Husband The Right Way

Sexless marriages affect 17 percent of married couples and the seriousness can vary from couple to couple. Many people believe that this situation means that there is a total lack of sex (none) this isn't so, people who experience this problem do have sex but usually less than 10 times per year. There are many things which can be done to resolve this situation but the problem is finding what caused the problem in the first place.

When people try dealing with a sexless marriage on their own they nearly always forget to go back to the root of the problem. Think of this condition like losing your keys; when you lose your keys people always ask you "where did you see them last" and I can guarantee that you always reply with "if I knew that, I'd know where they were", but like a light going on you suddenly remember where you put them. A sexless marriage is just the same (in principle) if you think back far enough you will find the underlying problem which started all of this.

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There are so many problems which affect our lives today that they do inevitably put a large amount of pressure on our home and sex lives. Men who have a bad day at work may want to just sit quietly, women who have had a rough time dealing with the children may simply want to go to bed and sleep. These are only two problems which can start you on the road of a sexless marriage, in themselves they don't seem that bad but if the stress levels continue to rise, it's very easy for these situations to become the underlying problems which lead to the sexless marriage.

If you sit back and think about any major changes in your lives over the last two years you can probably come up with quite a comprehensive list. If you then go through the list you may start to see a pattern of dramatic changes which had an impact on your sex lives.

So! Is your marriage becoming sexless? If you think that it is, you really do need to do something about it sooner rather than later. Many people in a sexless marriage find the situation too much to handle and file for divorce because they just can't see an end to it. Divorcing someone is easy, working together to fix a problem can only serve to make your marriage better, and your love life much better.

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Is your marriage life experiencing a crisis? If you are among the thousands of couples struggling with their married life, there are still several things you could do to save it. It is normal for couples to have engaged in healthy arguments once in a while. After all, everyone has their own share of bad days, be it under so much work related stress or maybe the use of poor judgment in certain situations. Instead of emotionally disengaging with each other or maybe getting furious, try to 'fix' and 'salvage' your relationship if you are truly the offender. If you are the party who received the damage, then you are challenged to accept your spouse's 'marriage repair' attempts. Acquiring skills to repair your marriage is great for keeping your marital relationship back on track from the mistakes that both partners have made. Based on several research studies, every couple's fights and the factor that distinguishes the 'masters of marriage' from the 'disasters of marriage' is the couple's ability to mend any subsequent damage.

Understand that true happiness only comes within. If you are among those individuals who say that their respective spouses aren't making them happy anymore, then maybe you should try to consider and examine the reason behind. Genuine happiness only comes from within and unless your partner is humanity's horror, then your unhappiness probably emanated from an unfulfilled desire within yourself.

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Try to unify your house. Talk on how you picture your very own house in mind. It would be important that couples agree on their home design to avoid long term conflicts. A man would want his home to be a place where he can get his stuff while a woman wants her home to be neatly arranged at all times and appear like a 'show home'. Learn how to compromise emotionally, physically and even at home.

Never compare your current marriage to past relationships. No two marital relationships are the same. It will be impossible to replicate a relationship with a different partner in the mix.

Arrange some 'quality time' with your spouse. Your 'spouse time' shouldn't be as long as a one week vacation. You can go on a date or simply have dinner together.

Reminisce with your partner on the good old times. These wonderful experiences together act like glue that bonds your relationship stronger. The more you do fun and exciting things together, the more stuffs you'll have to look back in the future.

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Marriage can be one of the most important decision you could ever make in your life. As such a significant decision affects your entire future, it is crucial to find a solution to problems and conflicts in your relationship. Although your current outlook may look bleak, you can find comfort in knowing that you can save your marriage starting today.

You and your spouse should try to find a time and place where you will have no interruptions and begin discussing the problems in your marriage. Sometimes, your spouse may not even have any idea that you have a problems with some aspect of your relationship and you may also be unaware of your partner's issues as well. Not talking about your conflicts can make your problems grow bigger and bigger like a snowball so it is important to get things out in the open as soon as possible.

Avoid becoming confrontational and turning your conversation into an argument. Remember, you are trying to have a discussion to resolve issues, not create additional ones. Remain calm and rational and if things start to get heated, you both should end the conversation and take a breather before it turns into a fight.

Even if there are several problems, make a goal to solve just one problem at a time. This way you can focus on one issue before moving onto the next one. Be prepared to compromise and make some sacrifices for each other to save your marriage. Once you have come to an agreement, work together on a daily basis to stick to your promise to one another.

Also, remember the problems probably did not come about overnight. You both will need to take it slow and not expect it to be resolved immediately. Just be patient with each other because it will take time and effort to repair your relationship.

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There is so much talk of how women cannot be understood, and how what women want remains a complete mystery to all, that another critical question gets severely over-shadowed. How does a dedicated wife understand her husband? Honestly, women feel that in the frenzy of being marked perpetually misunderstood, they cannot admit even to themselves that they are at an equal loss to understand how men work.

The key to understanding men in relationships lies in admitting to the fact that they have been created to be different. In every way, a man reacts, responds and reflects differently from a woman. Once you understand and accept this simple fact you will be able to progress in your relationship because your need to change your husband will be replaced with the resolve to change yourself.

Here are 3 very basic examples on how men and women differ:

1) Straight talk and going around in circles: we as women want to have circular conversations about everyday work that consists of an ongoing dialogue with the people we encounter during a day. Have you ever noticed how your husband gets exasperated when you mention the same point in a conversation more than once? This is because men like to speak in straight lines, and once you have told them something they will take their time to absorb, reflect and respond. However, repeating the same point to them makes them feel inadequate in your eyes.

The next time you and your husband fall into a disagreement of sorts, force yourself to say every sentence once and not more. If you feel that you are getting redundant, leave the room or the conversation with a smile and silence.

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2) Short stories and novels: so you get that coveted sweater from your favorite store, and it is a complete bargain. You want to tell your husband all about it, from the moment you read the advertisement in the newspaper, to waiting in the traffic jam and finally cutting in line to get the last item in your size, you want him to be a part of it all. Except, he just wants to hear the last line of your story.

He is happy for you and your sweater, just that his way of expressing happiness is moving on and spending time with you in your brand new attire.

The next time you are tempted to tell your husband a long story, call a girlfriend instead. Your husband is your best friend, not your girlfriend. Know the difference and act upon it.

3) History and amnesia: You must find it exasperating to see your husband completely forget the personality traits of another individual, especially of someone who means harm to your married life. This could be a colleague, a flame from the past, an interfering relative or a nosy neighbor. You feel belittled because you have to explain each time to your husband just why that person is not the right company to keep.

An easier thing to do is watch over your married life for your husband, since men are simply not made to bunch past events together to form a general opinion about anyone. Women have the tendency and the knack to spot a bad egg and make sure not to tread on the same path again.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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