Having a close relationship with the love of your life is both easy and challenging. If you start off your relationship being close it is much easier to continue this as your relationship grows, but it is never too late to get closer. A key element of a happy and rewarding relationship is communication. If you are communicating openly with your partner, you are going to be close. If you keep things from your partner, you are automatically building walls that will only grow bigger and be harder to tear down later on. Another key to a strong relationship is affection. These two items alone can make or break a relationship.

We often will try to over think what is on our minds. Sometimes the best thing we can do is not to think, but to just do. But of course there is always that happy medium. The concept of Yen and Yang is something we should all understand. It applies to everything. In this application, it would mean to not over think, and at the same time, you have to think before you speak. So what does all that mean? If we are feeling something in our relationship, we should communicate that with our partner whether it is good or bad. When we are trying to communicate something, we should be careful to not upset our partner and make them shut down, yet if we try to protect their feelings too much, we may not get the message across, and we then feel as if our needs are not met. Thus the Yen and Yang principle again comes into play.

When my sweetheart is trying to let me know something isn’t just right, she will let me know by talking in terms of her feelings. This is a very effective way of communicating as no blame is being placed on the other person, which could lead to that partner being closed off. She knows that I truly care about her feelings, and will do anything to keep her happy and smiling. Of course this method means I have to be truly listening to the message when she expresses those feelings, or I will miss what she is saying, and that is never a good thing. By being so in tuned to what she is saying, we stay very close to each other by the magical bond of paying attention. This is a very major part of intimacy. So not only do I stay on top of things and can adjust what I do to make sure she is happy, but I am also getting closer and closer to her with every conversation as a side effect of listening. She feels the sincerity of my feelings towards her making her feel comfortable and loved, and I feel good by being able to make my own decision on how to change that feeling she has or even if there is something I need to do, thus making me feel closer to her.

In order for this to work, you can’t stow feelings away for a later time. It is better to get those feelings out in the open when they are live in your mind. Stowing things away for a later time will only escalate the issue to the point you will not be able to communicate that feeling effectively, and you will cause a divide between you and your loved one until one day you wake up feeling like you don’t know the person next to you. It is also important to be in tune with your own feelings and understand when you are truly feeling something real or imagined. This might take some practice and effort from both of you, but it is worth it to make that effort. The more you are in sync with your partner, the closer you will feel, and soon you may find the little things that used to bother you don’t even register in your mind anymore. After all, a feeling is your own reaction to what you are interpreting from the stimulus at hand. Since it is an interpretation, it is subject to change from day to day.

Affection can be something as simple as a hug or a kiss, or even little love notes left around or a text message sent to your sweetheart. It is important to be affectionate in your relationship, as this will also keep you close. Just as communication between two people can create a strong bond, direct physical closeness will keep the bond strong. All people like to be touched by the right person. We all want to feel desired and amorous. So grab your sweetheart and kiss them often, hug them every chance you get. Kiss them on the cheek, neck, lips hand, belly, anyplace you can as often as you like. Hold their hand when you are walking or driving or even pushing the shopping cart. Physical closeness is important, and will keep your feelings alive. If your feelings are alive always, you will be more in tune with those feelings and be able to communicate them together. If you are meeting both the communication closeness and the physical closeness, then your yen and yang of your relationship will be in balance and you will have no choice but to be happy.

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