Tired Of Being Accused Of Cheating: How To Deal With False Accusations From Spouse - What To Do When You've Been Wrongly Accused Of Cheating

Tired Of Being Accused Of Cheating: How To Deal With False Accusations From Spouse - What To Do When You've Been Wrongly Accused Of Cheating

When you've been accused of cheating, your first reaction may be to go on the defensive. It's very common and completely natural to feel as if you are being attacked when your partner thinks you're having an affair. After that initial reaction, take a step back to examine your relationship.

Most men and women wouldn't even conceive the idea of you being unfaithful if things were hunky dory in your relationship. So, what is missing? What brought out this green eyed monster in your mate? It's up to you to be the detective and figure out where your marriage has gone awry. Follow these steps to get back on the right path after you've been accused of cheating.

First and foremost you need to assure your partner that you're not cheating (if in fact you are not). This solves two problems. It helps build your spouse up and helps to build you up in your spouses' eyes. Explain that you understand things aren't right in your marriage and that you're willing to do whatever it takes to make it better so that she never has reason to cheat again.

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Secondly, have a candid conversation about what made your partner even think that you were having an affair. You are going to have to come right out and ask her what is going on that she would think that. Have your habits or behaviors suddenly changed? Is your relationship strained? Understand that your spouse may not even know what is causing her uneasiness and you may have to start asking lots of very pointed questions to get to the bottom of it. Do not take offense when your wife starts telling you what she feels is wrong and what brought about the concern to begin with. Remember that you are trying to find out from your wife what caused HER concern and it's most likely going to be something she perceives you said or did.

Finally, don't be afraid to change. It's going to take massive amounts of work to overcome whatever your wife told you was at the root of her concerns but it will be well worth it in the end. Keep in mind as you're working through these issues that you may have some of your own issues with your wife and there may be some things that she needs to change as well. However, remember that she had enough concern about your relationship that she thought you were having an affair and right now your job is to get past those feelings. Once you begin to make some progress and changes then you can slowly broach the subject of what you feel is lacking in your relationship. For now, focus on your wife.

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You didn't cheat on your spouse, but your marriage feels doomed and is not on the good side. Normally, communication breakdown is often the obvious sign on the road to a broken marriage. If you sense signs of trouble brewing in your marriage, learn how to fix a broken marriage.

In order to learn how to fix a broken marriage, you must learn how to communicate effectively with your spouse. This mean both of you have to learn how to listen patiently. If both of you are not talking to each other or constantly quarrelling whenever communicating, this is a bad sign to the marriage.

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Sometimes issues such as finance, kids or work etc can cause couples to have some problems. The key to fix a broken marriage is to make sure both of you are happy so if you can try to work out a good discussion to talk about things that you are concerned with, this might help to open up the communication and let you understand better on the marriage.

If any of you wants to have some space and quiet time to be away from each other, Take a break to go for a holiday. Sometimes having some time to be away from each other can help to calm down your emotions and give you some space to think of what you really want in this marriage.

Learning how to fix a broken marriage will also need you to show appreciation. Say thank you for small little things and don't take things for granted. Avoid disagreements if you can especially when you want to save your marriage.

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Marriage isn't always easy. Even when both partners are completely committed to one another, challenges come up that threaten to destroy the relationship. If you're a woman who is right now facing conflict in her relationship, you already know first hand how difficult it can be to remain positive and hopeful. This is even harder to do if your spouse has decided he wants a separation. Knowing what to do when your husband leaves you can ensure that you get another chance to rebuild your marriage.

First on the list of what to do when your husband leaves you is accept that the relationship is in a state of transition. Even if your husband has brought up the idea of a separation don't mistake that for the beginning of the end. Many couples bounce back from time apart and even have stronger, more loving marriages. Instead of fighting him tooth and nail on the issue of him leaving for a bit, agree to it. You can actually use this to your advantage in several ways.

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If you allow your husband to leave you're also going to create a scenario that will ensure he'll miss you. The old saying about the grass being greener on the other side applies in this case. Your husband may have a specific idea of what his life will be like once he moves out, but reality is going to be completely different. It won't take him long to feel your absence from his life. He'll miss you and that's a very good thing. It's also going to allow him some crucial time to think. It can be hard to focus on what we really want when we're in the middle of a stress filled environment. Once he's on his own he'll have more than enough opportunity to reflect on his life and exactly what you mean to him.

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I sometimes hear from wives who are determined to hold out hope for a reconciliation even when others believe that they are crazy or delusional to do so. I can identify with these wives because I used to be one of them. These wives often want some reassure that they aren't just grasping at implausible straws.

I might hear from one who says: "my husband pursued a separation because he said he didn't want to be married any more. This is what he said to make it sound more palatable. But what he really meant was that he didn't want to be married to me. Going even further, he meant that he didn't want me anymore. During this whole separation, I have been hoping that he would discover that he wanted me once again. So far, I haven't seen a lot of behaviors which would indicate that this is what is happening. There are times when he is pleasant to me, but there is really nothing beyond this. I told one of my friends about my wishes and she told me that my thought process was ridiculous. She said that separated husbands don't 'discover' that they want their wives again. They either want her or they don't. But they don't 'discover' anything. I appreciate my friend's honesty. I really do. I can always count on her to tell me the truth. But I find this so discouraging. Is it just not possible that, because he's away from me, that he can discover that maybe he has some feelings left for me? Or am I just fooling myself?"

I honestly do believe that in some cases, both spouses can rediscover their feelings for one another during a separation. And the reason for this is very simple. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. It is difficult to take someone for granted when you are no longer living with them or you no longer see them every day. It is easier to see the good side of someone when you are no longer privy to it.

I can't tell you that this happens in every instance. Sometimes, the spouse who initiated the separation really doesn't change his mind or his feelings. However, every separation and every couple is different. I would not call it rare for a man to discover that he misses his wife and wants her back. It happens every day.

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However, I don't like to leave this to chance. I can't promise you that your actions can always control the outcome. That would be somewhat unrealistic. But I do believe that many times, our deliberate and well executed actions can contribute to our success in luring our husbands back to us.

For example, you can make it clear that you hope he changes his mind, but you don't want to come off as desperate. You may also want to consider making it clear that although you miss your husband and are hoping for the best as far as your marriage is concerned, you are living your own life. I will tell you something that I have come to truly believe. In this case, confidence is attractive.

I understand that when you feel that your husband doesn't want you, then you feel rejected. But when you feel rejected, you tend to project an attitude that you are not good enough and that the best that you can hope for is to just wait helplessly in the event that he changes his mind. In my experience and opinion, this is not what you want to project. I learned this first hand during my own separation. Instead, you want to do everything in your power to build yourself up, even when you think that no one is watching. Do you know why? Because if you can build yourself up and regain your confidence when you are in private, then when you are with your husband, you don't have to pretend to be confident when you are really not. You can be genuinely playful and laughing and attractive because you really believe this about yourself.

When you are successful with this, you have a much better chance of your husband responding positively. The point that I am trying to make here is that yes, there is a chance that your husband will discover that he wants you again. But why not enhance that chance by giving him something wonderful, and something new, to discover?

Many wives tell me they don't know where to start. I suggest only with yourself. For just a while, take him out of the equation. Do what makes you happy. Think about what you yourself respond to and what makes you feel pretty and confident. Because when you make yourself happy, this projects outward and this is attractive in a way that is authentic and very easy to pull off.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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