In a world fully corrupted by what is considered beautiful and worthy of confidence, many women have lost themselves. Self-esteem has become a foreign concept as we drive down the road unconsciously viewing billboard after billboard of impractical, digitally-altered images. We arrive home only to watch television, flip through magazines, and fill our minds with even more of this worldly "perfection". At some point in all this, we become displeased with the body we have.

Image after image shows in our minds and suddenly we feel the need to be a size 2, with long eyelashes, flawless complexion, flat abs, big lips, a perfect smile, and the list could continue forever. We often forget that these images are altered to the point that Cindy Crawford wakes up wishing she looked like the Cindy Crawford in the magazine. We forget the models were "primped" for hours, the fan is blowing just right to make their hair have that look, the lighting has been professionally positioned, and she has more people working on her image than you see in a single day. Yet somehow.... we still feel a need to measure up.

But then maybe you claim that media doesn't affect you. Maybe you know that those images are ridiculously altered. Maybe you just have real, practical friends that you consider prettier than yourself. Maybe you wonder why your co-worker is skinnier than you and maybe you wish for some aspect of your best friend to be yours. We can go on and on about what is beautiful, how to obtain it, and why we didn't get the genetics of that movie star we idolize, but what good does that do us?

With all these negative thoughts going through our minds, there's no wonder we are lacking self-esteem. If all we hear ourselves say is how much weight we need to lose as we grab random body parts in the mirror, we are doing nothing for our confidence. The good news is that self-esteem is very much achievable no matter what you size you wear, what color your hair is, and how flat your abs are. It is accomplished by cherishing and respecting yourself for WHO YOU ARE.

Now, I’m sure you’re thinking, “ Easy for you to say…..have you seen my _______?” Please understand that this change of mindset may not be conquerable overnight. It’s a process to change the way you have always thought, but a process well worth the results. Believe me when I tell you to work for this. It will bring about its own rewards. Here are a few things that will help you in this endeavor to change your thoughts.

Step One: Put the negative thinking aside. When thoughts cross your mind, openly reject them…. Out loud if possible. Understand that these thoughts are normal and we all have them. It’s okay for the bird to fly through the barn, but DO NOT build a nest for it. Cast it out. Let it go.

Step Two: Replace the negative thoughts with positive ones. When you begin to think you’re fat, rebuke it and speak AS IF you are fit. We are what we say. DO NOT say, “I will be in shape one day” say “I am fit and in shape; I am healthy.”

Step Three: STOP comparing yourself to other women. Unless you have an identical twin, you do not have the same genetics as anyone and you will never look like them. Do yourself a favor and just stop comparing your body to anyone else’s. This alone will change your outlook. Train yourself to just not look. It’s doing nothing for you.

Step Four: Change the way the world has taught you to view your body. Don’t think about how your nose is too big, but thank your nose for doing its job when you smell that sweet aroma. Thank God that your legs get you from point A to B and your eyes can see what’s in front of you. Each part of your body has a purpose, and I can guarantee you that none of them are there simply so you can hate them.

Step Five: Make a list. Write down the parts of your body you love and that work just fine. Focus on those parts. When you get down on your looks, pull that list out and read it until you KNOW you are beautiful, special, and unique.

Most of all, understand that you are God’s creation. He formed you and said, “It is GOOD.” If God thinks you are good, nothing else really matters all that much. You are beautiful, favored, and lovely. Embrace the beauty of being a woman.

Author's Bio: 

Coach Carrie Clark is certified in Christian Life Coaching and Girl's Self-Esteem Coaching, with a BA in Psychology. She reaches out to women and girls throughout central Florida, coaching them back to a positive self-perception. Through private coaching, group coaching, seminars, workshops, and inventories, there are many ways to improve your self-esteem.

Coach Carrie believes that having a right relationship with yourself, in Christ, is the foundation upon which all surrounding relationships exist, which is why she offices with Amazing Relationships, a life coaching center in Orlando, FL.

Her mission is to teach young girls and women how they can fully embrace who God has called them to be. She believes that the “rules” of society, stating we must look a certain way to be beautiful, are nothing but lies from the enemy and it is her goal to restore the truth that we are all made perfect in His image. Her passion and desire in a few words is to transform lives by transforming thought processes and taking control of what we allow ourselves to think.

With a lot of work, effort, and renewing of our minds, there is nothing we can't accomplish in Christ.