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Browse published articles attributed to Keith Bray, with full-archive search.
WHERE TO FIND SERENITY I'm sitting here on a rainy Thursday morning, at peace with the world. I was to have played in a golf tou ament this morning, and was quite looking forward to it. In days a decade and a half ago, having the event canceled by rain would have ticked me off and disrupted serenity. So would have many of the other major set backs I have faced over the past fifteen years.
"Character isn't inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts, thought by thought, action by action. If one lets fear or hate or anger take possession of the mind, they become self-forged chains." -- Helen Douglas How do you feel about anger, in yourself and in others? How do you deal with it? Anger is powerful energy. If we are afraid of this energy, we may attempt to deny or hide it.
THE FACE in the MIRROR On of the greatest compliments I have ever had from a client is that in our relationship, I was a great mirror for him. The mirror is an inexpensive tool all those seeking improved self esteem have at their disposal. It is a tool I often make a primary one in working with others. Why? Read on from a great article just published in his “Idea Engineer” by my mentor and friend, Dr. Randin Brons. The face in the mirror
MORE-THAT FIRST STEP (forgiveness) As usual, my coaching mentor, Dr. Randin Brons has hit a very good topic with this week's Idea Engineer. Recently I did a blog on that first step that sparked very good response. Response indicates that it caused some thought, and I love to do that internally and spark it in others. Randin talks about a first step to forgiveness, and his words are in keeping with I try to live and coach others in.
THE POWER OF ACCEPTANCE As each new year begins, I love to go through and meditate on the 12 steps. As I constantly tell others, while the 12 steps in the familiar format people look at today come from AA, there is no better model for any human being to follow for good mental hygiene. Want a better life tomorrow than you have today, start a journey using the 12 steps as your map! My mentor Dr. Randin Brons just published the following thoughts in his Idea Engineer, and lo and behold they go right to the first step’s theme. ACCEPTANCE. He wrote: The power of acceptancer
It is true for all of us, there are times when S..T happens. It is how we respond to it that counts. I love to play golf. The golf course is such a window on life and an insight into the people who play the game. Spend four hours plus with a seemingly intelligent and balanced human being, let them put on a "Tiger Woods Casual" outfit (Tiger wears shorts when not playing tour events), put them in a beautiful setting and arm them with a club(s), little stationary ball and an objective to get the club(s) to direct the ball into a 4 inch hole with the least swings possible! WOW!
Things do not change; we change. --Henry David Thoreau For a man who is in the coaching business, and is on the life journey I’m on, I find the title statement PROFOUND. Think on it and see if you can see the depth of the thought. I spent a good portion of my life thinking I could change ...
A simple life is something I sought, and continue to seek. I love this article written by my coaching professor (literally), and think many of you will enjoy it too. As you would expect, it is in keeping with what we coach at Hope & Serenity-Coached To Success. Living Life the Simple Waynby ...
AN EXPECTATION/PROMISE You have decided to work hard on rebuilding a life that you are happy with. You understand the process ahead of you and realise that it will require commitment and hard work. You have set some goals. It is time to act, but you have normal fear about making big changes. Will others still like me? Will my life become boring?
My Life Coaching mentor, Dr. Randin Brons, Has once again hit a chord with this week Idea Generator. Celebrate differences. "Souls don't have races or sexes or religions. They are beyond artificial divisions." -- Brian Weiss Intolerance of differences always exists in people who don't know who they are, people who don't have a strong sense of their own authentic self; the soul within. Intolerance is rooted in fear. The basis for having a strong sense of self-esteem is to replace our unconscious idea of basic unworthiness with a conscious knowing of our fundamental inherent goodness.
A week ago, I was facing surgery for the first time since I underwent a psychic change through the process of recovery. Lets be honest, the surgery was not life threatening although what was being corrected caused constant pain. I was not thrilled by the thought of someone cutting my groin area, ...
With “Mother’s Day” just past, what a better a topic to think about than relationships? They have such a huge impact on every facet of life. My relationship (like many men) with my mother was a troubled one. I was the victim of abuse, and did not feel safe or like I belonged as a child. My ...
Humor-Age and Wisdom When doing my journal, I can get very serious. For those that really know me, humor has been a huge part of my recovery and journey, and is evident in most of the places I frequent. My higher power certainly finds ways to make sure I don’t take life too ...
Do you believe in yourself? "We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves." -- Orison Swett Marden Each week I receive an idea generator from my coaching mentor, Dr. Randin Brons. Seldom does Randin send something that does not provoke thought within me and usually it takes me back to where my head was at when I sought help to begin a journey to a different life. I was challenged to change, and change I did through direction. The question posed is only six words.
I am not, today, a religious person, but to move from a low start point to a life I love today, I had to understand what god is to me. It is safe to say, at my lowest hour, I was spiritually bankrupt. I was the centre of my own universe and I tried to control all within it. For a long period it seemed to work; then it flew apart leaving me with a life without centre. I believe in the psychology of the 12 steps and a concept of a Higher Power as you personally understand that power.
Got this great reading today from Hazelden, and boy did it hit home! I only wish that I had “got it” as it relates to my mother by the time I was 35. Man, she, and a few select other very close to me, knew exactly what buttons to push. I’ve learned that it was I who allowed them to be pushed, ...
CHANGE THROUGH COACHING What I said never changed anybody; what they understood did.rn--Paul. P. To often in my role as a life coach, potential sponsor or mentor, I run across people who think I can change them. Craziness as the above quote states. The only person I can change is I, and this is a journey that has been work in progress for many years, and continues. For those who are looking for the answers they have within in nearly all aspects of their life, a coach or mentor can have them find it within. Many really do need a guide.
BEDEVILMENTS (interesting word) Got this reading this morning, and the word bedevilment is one I have not seen in ages. So over to Mr. Webster. He says, "exasperating interference and trouble; a besetting with devils". The way he puts it, I know I have experienced it. Have you? The message: ...
Upon reflection, the biggest stumbling block to get a journey started to a life I am happy with was seven little letters. HONESTY. Over many years I had lied to myself and others, I had been less the honest in dealings with others, and had created a Disneyland in my head which had become a ...
A Spiritual (not religious) Lifestyle Thought to Ponder . . .True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. As I made a decision to do something about my life as it was back in 1994, early on I had the GOD thing thrown at me. Like most, I had attended Sunday school as a kid and ...
Responsibility brings power. "To be tested is good. The challenged life may be the best therapist." -- Gail Sheehy Time spent on my personal co-creative process of recovering a life that I knew was meant for me opens my eyes to truths on a continuous basis. One of these truths is that for my ...
I was blessed a year or so ago to have a man named Patrick Meninga come into my life through “electronic” channels. He is the “Spiritual River” man (www.spiritualriver.com).nnOver the period we have got to know each other and have partnered on a few very small ventures. Our common bonds? We are ...
GET REAL (with expectations) Another one of those readings that struck a chord, and reminded me of universal truths in life and recovering an abundant life! I am a very avid golfer; some have even accused me of being addicted to the sport. Funny, what I really like about golf is the sociability of the game coupled with the natural outdoors setting. At my darkest times, I found more serenity on the golf course than in any other spot on earth. People assume because you play a lot and are passionate, that you are good at it. For me and golf, this is not the case.
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." -- Ralph Waldo Emerso R.W. Emerson certainly must have known me in a past life. I spent a four decades trying to be who I thought you wanted me to be, and no one, and ultimately ...
So You Want the “Big Life”? Getting it through coaching Written by Gary Glasscock and Keith Bray Whether it is in life, sports, fitness, career, relationships, health, or executive performance, more and more people are turning to personal coaches to help them achieve goals they set ...
It’s always interesting to see what a difference 24 hours can make, even two hours. I am a life transformation coach, coach based on many of the principles Eckhart Tolle put forth in A New Earth, I have a strong spiritual foundation, have helped many others, have been addiction free for a ...
Time to blossom "The voice of our original self is often muffled, overwhelmed, even strangled, by the voices of other people's expectations." -- Julie Cameronr Ah, the expectations of others. They had a huge (negative) impact on my life, how about yours? I lived many years feeling that I had failed the expectations of others; and this certainly included my parents. Life was not great feeling like you didn't measure up. Although I accomplished quite a bit, it never seemed to be enough or in the right areas. I think many can relate. In his Idea Engineer, my mentor Dr.
With a smile on my face, I say, “will restore us to sanity”! It’s Sunday, and for the second day in a row, I headed to the golf course with anticipation. For the second day in a row, it began to rain part way through the golf game. For the second day in a row, I finished the ...
HAD NO CHOICE! When I was being made as a person and if I had been able to pick my attributes, I would not have chosen addictions and the effects of addictions, to be part of my life. That being said, addictions and abuse did impact on my life. This not very unique. About 10% of the ...
We are all blessed with two minds; one conscious that we react to and are aware of, the other, subconscious; a place where dreams dwell. A place of untapped possibilities. Just like high performing athletes, entertainers and business leaders, all of us can use coaching to take us to the ...
Dick Cavett was quoted as saying "It is a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear" and Oscar Wilde said "To love ones self is the beginning of a lifelong romance”. Emerson said "Where there is no vision, people perish". I hit a point in my life where balance became a real issue. In working with clients and others I know I'm not alone. There was a balance in daily routine which made allot of sense. I certainly lived erratically. This area was addressed thoroughly at the treatment centre I attended many years ago.
As I started on the process of life recovery, I felt that there was no one there who would really listen to me and actually hear me. Today I realise there are a few people who do listen to me and hear me; and this includes my wife and a few “skilled” others. Listening is a learned skill that ...
Personal Powe "We are no longer puppets being manipulated by outside powerful forces; we become the powerful force ourselves." -- Leo Buscagli In making dramatic change in our life, is there really not just one thing we are seeking? Personal Power? Ther came a time in my life that I realised I ...
The last couple of weeks, being knocked flat by an infection bug, have certainly given me time to reflect on some real core issues. One great reminder has been the importance of the moment and keeping my mind open to the “potential” of NOW. Within now are answers. "Why not concentrate on the ...
A Moment of Clarity Ever have occurrences and thoughts in your life that seem to come out of nowhere, then reoccur over a period of time? I have been going through just that over the past few weeks. In my line of work, I see many people struggling to get a new life and grow in a new direction. ...
So You Want the Big Life???? Getting it through coaching Written by Gary Glasscock and Keith Bray Whether it is in life, sports, fitness, career, relationships, health, or executive performance, more and more people are turning to personal coaches to help them achieve goals they set for ...
-living a life with new behavior in play!! So here we are, at the end of the page, and oh what a challenge. We’ve gone through all this work. We’ve had a “spiritual awakening as a result of THESE steps” and now we have to live the life? So what are these principles ...
How can disappointments be opportunities to grow? When we feel thwarted, frustrated or empty it is difficult - but not impossible - to see the positive side of our pain. It is from this type of situation we are trained to coach people to success- however they define success. Most ...
Thought to Ponder . . .Never mistake motion for action. I read the book, sat on the sidelines at dances, talked the talk but didn’t get off my duff to actually dance. I dreamed I was mister dancing king, I fantasized what it would feel like, but when it came time to dance, reality was much ...
Bankrupt of Faith? Ok Mr. Webster, your on! In this period we live in we all understand bankrupt, but what can you tell us about FAITH? On page 338 of this very thick editio I have, you state about FAITH:""trust, confidence; complete acceptance of a truth which cannot be demonstrated or ...
For as long as I can remember, I have loved to “observe” people. We are fascinating creatures. Throughout a great business career, and being people orientated, I have seen humans around the world in all colours, shapes and sizes. There are issues shared by all, and “TRUST ISSUES” are ...
I must admit that I missed A New Earth and Eckhart Tolle on web cast last night. I don’t miss Oprah, even though she did a good job. The things that I found in A New Earth, particularly as they apply to addiction recovery, life coaching and transformation, and awakening spiritually are ...
HOLISTIC HEALTH/BALANCE “Health is wholeness and balance, an inner resilience that allows you to meet the demands of living without being overwhelmed.”rn— Andrew Weil, MD Health is wholeness, and health is multi-faceted. When major areas of health are addressed, balance results. With an MD such as Dr. Weil, physical health is of primary importance. Keys are proper eating, exercise and rest and all in moderation. To co-creatively ensure your physical well being, regular check-ups are a key.
Learning to be aware of who we are and why a tremendous part of a recovery of life journey is. To do this, there is nothing better than a thorough working of the 4th step of the 12 steps. Going forward, we must make sure we stay in contact with “self” in an honest fashion each and every day. We ...
LEADER or FOLLOWER? The best leaders are those who know how to follow. --Anonymous Coaching is about asking powerful questions. Leader or follower falls into that category, and it is one I contemplate often because of the wide spread implications. Give it some thought. Am I a leader or a ...
Always good to read something from Norman Vincent Peale, the king of positive thinkers! I know a ton of people in my life who can find a negative in almost anything, they are the "king" of BUTS. Yes, But. Heard the phrase? I've been in that space also. Normal (what's "normie"-seperate ...
At this juncture of creating new footprints in the journey of life, I was well aware, more so tha I’d ever been, of my defects of character. Awareness is wonderful, but I wanted change that would give me a much better life. I wanted my defects gone! By this time, many things had changed ...
What a fabulous day yesterday with my grand kids. With no other adults around, and with the range of things that we did, I loved seeing the day through the eyes of children; and being “silly” at times also. I’m so grateful that the journey I’m on allowed me to have a day ...
WHO’S BEHIND YOUR SUCCESS? Behind an able man there are always other able men.rn--Chinese proverb The similarities between this and the saying “Behind every good man is a good woman” are striking. How many say “I am self-made”? No one succeeds alone. Most of us have had a strong desire in our lives to "do it ourselves." We have had the idea that strength and independence meant we should not rely on or receive help from others. Ah yes, big boys (and girls) don’t cry, and to ask for help to many is a show of weakness and a skill never learned. I know because I was there.r
Each year I like to run through the 12 steps as written in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. These steps were an adaptation of many works before them, and are a universal truth for all people who want to enjoy good mental Hygiene and an abundant life. They have been adopted by some 150 self-help ...