Positive Psychology Articles

We all know people who are, ah, . . . challenging. It could be a critical parent, a bossy supervisor, a relative who has you walking on eggshells, a nice but flaky friend, a co-worker who just doesn't like you, a partner who won't keep his or her agreements, or a politician you dislike. Right now I'm thinking of a neighbor who refused to pay his share of a fence between us. As Jean-Paul Sartre put it: "Hell is other people." Sure, that's overstated. But still, most of a person's hurts, disappointments, and irritations typically arise in reactions to other people.

As I was meditating this morning, our cat hopped up in my lap. It felt sweet to sit there with him. And yet - even though I was feeling fine and had plenty of time, there was this internal pressure to start zipping along with emails and calls and all the other clamoring minutiae of the day.

Our life feels so fulfilling when our mindset is positive, whereas negative thoughts and feelings drag us into suffering. So if our mindset is already negative, we should look at changing it into positive, at the earliest. What can we do to bring about this change? Let’s see… 1.Fight against your negativity. Imagine this situation: You have just stepped out of an interview for your dream job and the first thought that emerges is ‘what if they don’t appoint me? What if

We're all carrying a load, including tasks, challenges, worries, inner criticism, mistreatment from others, physical and emotional pain, loss and illness now or later, and everyday stresses and frustrations. Take a moment to get a sense of your own load. It's very real, isn't it? Recognizing it is just honesty and self-compassion, not exaggeration or self-pity.

Do you even know if you’re numb? Think about the experience of our foot falling asleep and the pins and needles and aching we feel when it awakens. We sit on our foot for a while and temporarily compress the nerves in it and don’t feel the discomfort until we move our foot.

Getting caught up in wanting - wanting both to get what's pleasant and to avoid what's unpleasant - is a major source of suffering and harm for oneself and others. First, a lot of what we want to get comes with a big price tag - such as that second cupcake, constant stimulation via TV and websites, lashing out in anger, intoxication, over-working, or manipulating others to get approval or love. On a larger scale, the consumer-based lifestyle widespread in Western nations leads them to eat up - often literally - a huge portion of the world's resources.

Things keep changing. The clock ticks, the day unfolds, trees grow, leaves turn brown, hair turns gray, children grow up and leave home, attention skitters from this to that, the cookie is delicious but then it's all gone, you're mad about something for awhile and then get over it, consciousness streams on and on and on.

While it may be easier said than done, staying positive after an injury may help you heal faster both mentally and physically. By maintaining a positive outlook, you will be more likely to engage with those around you and work harder to take the next steps in your rehab. A positive attitude will also help you overcome any limitations that the injury may have caused. What are some ways to stay positive and overcome your injuries? Talk to an AttorneyrnThe first thing that you w

Imagine a world in which people interacted with each other like ants or fish. Imagine a day at work like this, or in your family, aware of the surface behavior of the people around you but oblivious to their inner life while they remain unmoved by your own. That's a world without empathy. To me, it sounds like a horror film.

“The current idea we have of a class is someone who is without character, who lacks conviction and critical sense. Goodness is unknown, but it refers to compassion, goodness, values that are less put forward in our society. A kind person is attentive to the needs of others, which is a very good quality. True goodness is also to give without expecting anything in return, ”says psychologist Cynthia Turcotte. In everyday life, goodness should be obvious. The days are more pl

Imagine if each day you woke up and found $100 dollars in your bank account; and there was nothing you had to do to earn that money. Every day, without fail, it simply showed up. Imagine that you could spend it on anything you wish. What would you spend it on? Your Sacred Feminine Power of Creation is much the same. Each and every day you are gifted with the grace of Power. You never have to prove you are worth it, you never have to get anyone's approval to receive it and yo

In every moment, you and I and everyone and everything else - from quantum foam to fleeting thoughts, intimate relationships, rainforest ecosystems, and the stars themselves - are each a kind of standing wave, like the ever-changing though persistent pattern of water rising above a boulder in a river. We are the result of multiple causes flowing through us. As Buckminster Fuller famously said, "I seem to be a verb."

One Christmas I hiked down into the Grand Canyon, whose bottom lay a vertical mile below the rim. Its walls were layered like a cake, and a foot-high stripe of red or gray rock indicated a million-plus years of erosion by the Colorado river. Think of water - so soft and gentle - gradually carving through the hardest stone to reveal great beauty. Sometimes what seems weakest is actually most powerful.

We're usually aware of our own suffering, which - broadly defined - includes the whole range of physical and mental discomfort, from mild headache or anxiety to the agony of bone cancer or the anguish of losing a child. (Certainly, there is more to life than suffering, including great joy and fulfillment; that said, we'll sustain a single focus here.)

Most people spend most minutes of most days doing one thing after another. I sure do. Typing these words is a kind of doing, as is driving to work, making dinner, brushing one's teeth, or putting the kids to bed. For all the "labor-saving" devices of the past 50 years - dishwashers, phone machines, word processors, etc. - most of us are laboring more, not less. For example, in terms of employment, the average work week in America has gotten longer over the past 50 years.

Many interactions these days have a kind of bumper-car quality to them. At work, at home, on the telephone, via email: we sort of bounce off of each other while we exchange information, smile or frown, and move on. How often do we actually take the extra few seconds to get a sense of what's inside other people - especially their good qualities?

As a positive psychologist I am delighted to share this excerpt from my book, The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy with you. This article reveals the way that I initially began to reclaim my own Enchanted Self, resulting in my finding new ways to overcome adversity, experience positive ...

Or rather, why don’t we know we are Magicians, Shamans, Sages, Wizards and Mystics? I believe that we were all born with magic inside of us: a passion, desire and ability to express something that is uniquely our own. No one ever was or ever will be exactly like you. You are unique and you have something extraordinary inside of you waiting to be born and shared with the world. "The universe is holding its breath, waiting for you to take your place" ----- Jean Houston

We are busy. We have careers. We have families. We have chores that need to be tended to and friends who want our support. We have bills to pay, meals to cook and children or pets to take care of. In the fast-paced rhythm of our daily lives, it is easy to overlook our own well-being, and in the midst of an extra long to-do list, who has time to think about Sacred Feminine Power? You do. And you must. Matthew A old, a 19th century British poet claimed, "If ever there comes a

Different people choose to live their lives in a number of different ways, but there comes a time when we all start to realize our mortality. It’s usually at that point where we take stock of our lives and look back at the things we have accomplished, as well as those that have slipped through the cracks and remain undone. It’s at this point that many people start to think about fulfilling some of those missed opportunities by creating a bucket list. While there are those

We evolved to be afraid. The ancient ancestors that were casual and blithely hopeful, underestimating the risks around them - predators, loss of food, aggression from others of their kind - did not pass on their genes. But the ones that were nervous were very successful - and we are their great-grandchildren, sitting atop the food chain.

When was the last time you really laughed?n nI am not referring to a giggle or a chuckle. What I am talking about is side-splitting, jaw-aching, tears-running-down-your-face, all-out, roll-on-the-floor laughing. If you are like most of us, it has been longer than you can remember. n nThe truth is that we need to laugh, we want to laugh, and we always feel better after we have a good laugh. So why not just laugh? Because life has become too serious. In our busy, hectic, stress

My wife and kids tease me that the title of this practice is corny - and it is. Still, I like it. If you don't nourish the things that nourish you, they wither away like a plant in dry stony ground. Looking to the year ahead for you - a year that can begin whenever you want - what's one key thing that will bear lots of fruit for you if you take care of it?

I'm doing a series on my personal top five practices (all tied for first place), and have so far named three: meditate (including mindfulness, self-awareness, and, if you like, prayer), take in the good, and bless (including compassion, generosity, and love).

What could you offer? The Practice: Make the offering. Why?

Can you remember a time when you offered a gift to someone? Perhaps a holiday present, or a treat to a child, or taking time for a friend – or anything at all. How did this feel? Researchers have found that giving stimulates the same neural networks that light up when we feel physical pleasure, such eating a cookie or running warm water over cold hands. Long ago, the Buddha said that generosity makes one happy before, during, and after the giving.

Every one of us naturally wants to take steps toward positive thinking because it would take us toward more encouraging and optimistic experiences. Since thinking positively does not come naturally or easily to most of us, it takes focus to acquire them. However, the steps of affirmative thoughts are many, and not all steps to optimistic mindset are as effective and useful as others. So why do yo have to take more steps of feeling positively than you need to? I have made and

I usually describe a practice as something to do: get on your own side, see the being behind the eyes, take in the good, etc. This practice is different: it's something to recognize. From this recognition, appropriate action will follow. Let me explain. Some years ago I was invited to give a keynote at a conference with the largest audience I'd ever faced. It was a big step up for me. Legendary psychologists were giving the other talks, and I feared I wouldn't measure up. I was nervous. Real nervous.

We often see people running like crazy, putting all their efforts in getting into the best jobs they can, when all of their energy is inclined towards earning more and more grands. They think they will achieve their ultimate happiness once they are successful in attaining financial stability, which of course is a relative term and can never be defined. They directly associate happiness with money. On top of it, making passion your career is the new trend. So now people are mo

It's kind of amazing: right now, what you think and feel, enjoy and suffer, is changing your brain. The brain is the organ that learns, designed by evolution to be changed by our experiences: what scientists call experience-dependent neuroplasticity. Neurons that fire together, wire together. This means that each one of us has the power to use the mind to change the brain to change the mind for the better. To benefit oneself and other beings.

Most of us wear a kind of mask, a persona that hides our deepest thoughts and feelings, and presents a polished, controlled face to the world. To be sure, a persona is a good thing to have. For example, meetings at work, holidays with the in-laws, or a first date are usually not the best time to spill your guts. Just because you're selective about what you reveal to the world does not mean you're insincere; phoniness is only when we lie about what's really going on inside.

1. Care for Yourself First. Become aware of your emotional, spiritual, and physical needs through jou aling. Begin with the words “I feel” or “I need” or “I am”. Create new ways to meet your needs. If you don’t know how, think of a role model. Identify and practice daily habits that are self-nurturing and healing. If you have difficulty taking good care of yourself, take good care of your children's parent, your pet’s master, or your plant’s feeder.

We all have issues - including demands upon us, stresses, illnesses, losses, vulnerabilities, and pain. (As Alan Watts put it: "Life is wiggly.") Of course, many of our issues - in the broad sense I'm using the word here - are related to important sources of fulfillment, such as starting a business or raising a family; still, there's some kind of challenge.

Mr. X’s life is filled with an incessant round of activities. He is constantly on the move. He is driven and he pushes the boundaries. He soars high in his career. He is sure he has it all - the trappings of wealth and success, accolades and a great lifestyle. What more could he possibly ask for? And yet, strangely enough, Mr. X still feels a lingering sense of dissatisfaction. Although his life is such a phenomenal success story, he can’t understand why he doesn’t feel

If we were asked where our thoughts come from, most likely every one of us would point to our heads. We know that our brain houses our thoughts and with current research, we understand the process of neurons firing – our ‘brains’ telling us what to do. If we were asked where our movement comes from, most likely we would point to our arms and legs. We know that the muscles, tendons, bone and skin comprising our arms and legs produce movement as we raise, bend, lower, flex or maneuver them in some way.

Individuals who are mentally and emotionally healthy tend to be the masters of their behavior. Being healthy in both aspects enables an individual to take on life and its challenges all while building healthy relationships with the people they interact with and also leading lives that are not only productive but are also fulfilling. Bad things happen to everyone, whether you are a good person or not. If an individual is equipped with mental and emotional health, they find it

It's been said that the most powerful tool for physical health is a fork (or spoon), since the choices you make with it determine the good or bad things you put into your body.

Want to try a little experiment? Stop breathing. Really. For a few seconds, maybe a few dozen seconds, and see how it feels. For me, this experiment is an intimate way to experience a deep truth, that we live dependently, relying on 10,000 things for physical survival, happiness, love, and success.

Life is full of tradeoffs between benefits and costs. Sometimes, the benefits are worth the costs. For example, the rewards of going for a run - getting out in fresh air, improving health, etc. - are, for me at least, worth the costs of losing half an hour of work time while gaining a pair of achy legs. Similarly, it could well be that: getting a raise is worth the awkwardness of asking for one; teaching a child good lessons is worth the stress of correcting her; and deepening intimacy is worth the vulnerability of saying "I love you."

Research shows that relationships are built from interactions, and interactions are built from moments. A critical moment in an interaction is when one person wants something from the other one. ("Wants" include wishes, needs, desires, hopes, and longings.) The want could be simple and concrete, like "Please pass the salt." Or it could be complex and intangible, such as "Please love me as a romantic partner."

n nThis book review is part of a series that covers the topic of Positive Psychology. Positive Psychology is the study of the strengths and virtues that enable individuals and communities to thrive. Positive Psychology has three central concerns: positive emotions, positive individual traits, and positive institutions. Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is the Official Guide to Positive Psychology .nn Enchanted Self: A Positive Therapy , by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, is a valuable

The title of this practice is a little tongue-in-cheek. What I mean is, most of us - me included - spend time worrying about criticism: past, present, and even future. Yes, try hard, keep agreements, "don't be evil," etc. But sooner or later - usually sooner - someone is going to point out the error in your ways.

The word "competition" evokes various uplifting images. It might be the images of sportsmen and athletes performing marvelous feats of strength, agility or endurance. Or you might visualize corporations increasing their efficiency and innovating newer and better products or services; as they say build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door. Right from childhood, homo-sapiens learns to compete. Children are encouraged to play and as an inducement, we of

I’m probably the only one that is going to tell you not to set this certain goal for 2012. Goals are great, goals are fantastic, and goals are certainly needed, but this goal has been going on within generations for generations. Enough is enough and we must take a different approach for our own sanity. So it’s the New Year, and I’m sure there is about 80% of you who want a “new you”. A more fit, stronger, happier, richer, perkier (many ways), or younger, “new you”. When will

Many years ago, I was in a significant relationship in which the other person started doing things that surprised and hurt me. I'll preserve the privacy here so I won't be concrete, but it was pretty intense. After going through the first wave of reactions - What?! How could you? Are you kidding me?! - I settled down a bit. I had a choice.

You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is observing things with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you that means everyone else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass... On television Sally hears a man who is being interviewed comment about a woman skillfully kayaking down a class 5 rapids. “Hey,” he comments, “that’s pretty good for a woman!” She thinks, “That’s a pret

It's one thing to stick up for yourself and others. But it's a different matter to get caught up in wrangles, contentiousness, squabbles . . . in a word: quarrels. Similarly, it's one thing to disagree with someone, even to the point of arguing - but it's a different matter to get so caught up in your position that you lose sight of the bigger picture, including your relationship with the other person. Then you're quarreling. You know you're quarreling when you find yourself getting irritated, especially with that sticky feeling that you're just not gonna quit until you've won.

Making a difference can be difficult and it can be easy at the same time. It is difficult when we think “What could I possibly do to make a difference. I don’t have much to offer?” It is easy when we just lend a helping hand wherever we see an opportunity to do so and in whatever way we can. ...

"All great books contain boring portions, and all great lives have contained uninteresting stretches. [...] Kant is said never to have been more than ten miles from Koningsberg in all his life. Darwin, after going round the world, spent the whole of the rest of his life in his own house. Marx, after stirring up a few revolutions, decided to spend the remainder of his days in the British Museum." - Betrand Russell, The Conquest of Happiness This fragment from Russell's book is

I don’t know many things in life but I know one thing for sure. There is a spark in our hearts, but there is a fear as well. Today’s world is overwhelming for all of us. We need to survive financially, emotionally, be dignified and strong. We need our daily jobs so as to pay these monsters that fall under our doorway with a desire to eat our lugs. I know sometimes you feel you have had enough and believe me, I know that you do not exaggerate at all. On the other side, there i