In order to do, be, and have what you want, the first step is asking and the second step is receiving.

Receiving requires both the belief that you deserve your gift and that you be willing to accept it.
What if you have been asking (clearly, consistently, and continuously) and haven't been receiving what you want? Often that's because we have trouble accepting what we want to get. So much trouble, that we manage to never actually obtain what we say we want!

In order to truly accept a gift, you must feel deep in your heart that you are worthy of love, attention, and respect. Another integral part of accepting a gift is the belief that you can cope, and hopefully enjoy, the effect this gift will bring about in your life. If you believe that success will equate to illness, or misery, or overwhelm, you're probably won't experience success.

What gets in our way of feeling worthy of a gift and
feeling confident we can cope with the effects of the gift?

It's typically our unconscious beliefs. From infancy till now, we're absorbing what we see others do and say, what our parents have done and said, and the results we ourselves are experiencing. Your brain saves a piece here and a piece there, and pretty soon, you've got an internal story, at the unconscious level, about what happens when a person gets a lot of money, or becomes famous, or experiences abundance.

Your unconscious story describes the effect of the money, fame, success, love, children, and more. For example, people with lots of money are stuck-up, cold, selfish, or uncaring. Fame means you'll be hounded by others and have no privacy. Success means you'll become so busy that you're overwhelmed - you have no time for your family or anything except work.

One unconscious belief that I've overcome in the last year: success means you have no personal life and you become seriously ill. Holding an unconscious belief that equated success with illness, suffering, and withdrawal made it pretty hard for me to step out boldly into the business world!

How can you overcome unconscious stories? These are deep issues. To change them, you embark on a never-ending, incredibly rewarding journey. The method is simple; the results are profound.

This is truly a transformational journey. Once you start, it changes every aspect of your life. Because it's not an intellectual exercise - changing what you think, in turn changes what you feel, which changes the way you act and the way you speak. You are transformed from a shrinking and sad ball of guilt, or a flaming ball of anger, into a joyful and loving person, because you feel great internally and you act from that place outward, creating a new experience of yourself externally.

Here are the steps that have worked for me.

1. Become conscious. In each moment, what are you thinking? What are you feeling? Most importantly, what are you ignoring? When it comes to being unconscious, this last question is more critical than the others.

Your unconscious beliefs are typically illustrated through your speech and your actions. Unconscious beliefs are often not accessible through analysis by our conscious mind.

Your conscious and unconscious minds can hold two different and inconsistent beliefs simultaneously. You may be saying "I want success" AND at the same time be in the grip of an unconscious belief about why it's better for things to remain exactly as they are right now.

2. Once you uncover a limiting belief or unconscious story, move up the emotional scale; develop a belief that's one level higher. Move one step at a time, from: I can't do this, to I'm willing to learn, to sometimes I can do this, to I do it reasonably well until you get to: I'm good at this!

As part of developing a new belief, tell yourself a new story about the situation and how you deal with it, in rich vivid detail. Make sure you include your actions in this story, not just feelings. This will significantly enhance your movement up the emotional scale by reframing how you see and experience the situation and yourself.

3. Be gentle with yourself. These unconscious beliefs often stem from your wounded inner child. The only way to make progress with that hurting part is through love and joy - not analysis and not stress.

4. Pray, as often as possible, to whatever source you believe in. This reminds you that you are not alone. The universe wants you to have whatever you truly want. Prayer also focuses your thoughts, which helps on that journey to consciousness. Prayer promotes gratitude.

Call to Action

Simply start keeping track of what you're thinking and feeling. How much of it is negative and how much is positive? Are your perceptions truly based on the reality of your situation, or based on some old story coming up to the surface?

Author's Bio: 

Marcy Stahl’s passion is helping women direct sellers and solopreneurs achieve the successful lifestyle they want. She knows that the top entrepreneurs have the top mindsets. Her mission is to help every entrepreneur develop a profitable and abundant mindset.

Marcy is a serial entrepreneur. Previously, she co-founded and managed a government contracting firm that earned over $1M in annual revenues. She holds a B.S. with honors and M.S. in Computer Science from George Mason University. Prior to coaching, she spent 21 years in the corporate world in technology.

She is the co-author of Direct Selling Power. Marcy is an Area Chapter Coordinator with the Direct Selling Women’s Alliance (DSWA) and a member of the Direct Selling Women’s Speaker Bureau. She’s currently in coaching school for direct sellers.