Getting Unstuck and out of Denial

Are you stuck in your life? Not moving forward? Perhaps it's time to take an honest look at what you have been doing to move forward in your life.

I constantly have people come to people who desperately want to achieve success yet they anxiously wait by the sidelines waiting to see what will come their way. Truth in fact is success rarely drops in your lap but must be preceded by action based on realistic circumstances. Yet its much easier to stay in denial and remain stuck than it is to venture out of that comfort zone. Problem with that is that you won't be able to achieve your desires. In real life success is never convenient but failure is always convenient. To achieve success means starting right where you are with what you have now at hand.

Many people live their lives in a state of denial especially in this economy and stressful times. Denial is one of the top sabotaging strategies people use. And many times is it tied into the 'rescue me please' self-defeating behavior.

At the base of denial is deep rooted shame. There is an internal shame of something that you do not want anyone to see or know about you so you cover it up with Denial. Because for them to see or know this about you would imply that you are ‘less than’ or ‘unworthy’ in their eyes. But you must realize that is strictly your interpretation and has little to do with truth.

Denial is at the base of eating problems, financial problems, relationship problems and work/career problems. People are so overwhelmed with what is going on around them that they are not sure of what actions to take and at its base there is a shame that they are covering up.

When you are in denial you are giving up your control.Are you in denial about your financial situation, or your relationship? Maybe it's your fear of success you can't quite seem to cross over. If you are stuck in life, chances are good denial is at the bottom of it.

The best thing you can do for yourself is to be authentic and own your self defeating behaviors. You have to own them, expose them so that you can re-write them.

Everybody has them, yet so many think it should be this closely guarded secret. It’s as if another person would think less of you for thinking this way when in reality it has been my experience that they are relieved for this has been their same. It shows that you are authentic and can develop honest bonding relationships with others.

To break it down for you so that it will make your decisions easier to come by. And I will have to confess this is the system I use whenever I am stuck in a place that I don’t want to be in.

First analyze what thought or fear is keeping you stuck about that specific situation. What is the thought? Is it a self defeating pattern? What is that bringing up for you? What is the shame in it?

Once you start coming out of denial is when you start taking control of your life and for once having what you want instead of dealing with what you get in life.

In most situations the fear that is behind that self defeating thought is exactly what you must do. I know you don’t want to hear that and for many that makes your stomach churn. Fear is not to be thought of as a bad thing but rather as a signal for you to look internally and make changes so that you can take the next step in your life. That is a ‘growing sign’.

Once you realize that you have been in denial you have made a huge first step where you can write yourself an action plan to change your circumstances and start in the direction of where you want to be.

Supporting you in your success,

Chrissyann Smith