How To Deal With Dominating Husband: How To Stop A Controlling Husband

How To Deal With Dominating Husband: How To Stop A Controlling Husband

Do you have a controlling husband who is driving you crazy in every aspect of your life? If you are dealing with a power-hungry guy there are a number of reasons why he might be acting like a spoiled bully and the following information should be helpful to you.

There are varying degrees of the controlling husband and to illustrate some of their tendencies I've described them as follows;

Slightly Controlling Husband - He is the husband who likes to make sure he is in charge of certain things in your marriage. For example, he might insist that he manage the finances and deal with matters related to family security. He was probably taught growing up that there are certain responsibilities that he needs to fulfill as a husband and a father so in his mind, it's normal to take ownership of these things. There is some room for debate but not as much as his wife would like.

Moderately Controlling Husband - This is the husband who has come to believe that he has final say so over most matters in the home and marriage. He may from time to time go along with his wife's wishes but it's only out of the kindness of his heart or in his mind he is doing his wife a favor. He has a tendency to have a closed mind and is not willing to compromise very often. In his mind he is not a controlling husband but he is just being the king of his castle.

Extremely Controlling Husband - Another term for this guy would be a control freak. This kind of husband is a smothering and hard to live with individual. He has the desire to make decisions on everything from the clothes his wife wears, who she can hang out with and who can call the house or come over for a visit. He finds a need to approve the meals cooked, the amount of make-up worn and anything else that he has a desire to control.

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Now, I have no idea what type of controlling husband you might have or might be. I do know that it can be at the very least unhealthy for your marriage. I can't speak for all wives but I would bet that not one of them wants to be controlled. Sure, wives just like husbands want to be loved and cared for and feel secure. There is a difference between security and control.

Possible Reasons For Your Husband's Behavior

• He is an idiot (just kidding)

• He is following in the footsteps of his mentor (his father)

• Your husband is insecure and afraid if he loses control he loses you and the lifestyle he is enjoying

• He has no reason to change

Suggestions For Dealing With A Controlling Husband

• Seek outside help if your safety is at all at risk because of your husband's behavior. I realize this is a serious decision and a difficult one but if you or your children are in danger please think about getting intervention help. It could come in the form of counseling or close family or friends.

• For non-threatening situations I would suggest you slowly begin to push for changes in the dynamics of your relationship. Your husband needs to learn that you are not his child but his partner and you didn't sign-up to be his puppet.

• Make subtle changes and don't try to reverse what's been going on for years over night. Changing your husband's behavior might take a little time so be patient and begin pushing and redirecting him until he understands that things can't continue in the manner they have been.

If you are not happy living with your controlling husband it's time to make a change. Notice that I'm not suggesting that you change your husband. What I'm saying is that when you change your husband will understand that he has to stop his controlling ways, if he wants to continue to be married to you.

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Did you know that emotional abuse is the most frequent kind of abuse, but it's talked about less than any other abuse? Could you recognize what the signs of emotional abuse were if you were a victim of it?

Now, part of the reason it's so easy to miss emotional abuse is that a lot of what are considered normal and acceptable types of communication are in reality abusive and harmful. This type of abuse can be hard to define and unlike physical abuse is seldom reported.

Experts have understood that emotionally abusive behaviors are a way to get power and control. An abusive individual is going to disregard your feelings and needs, will expect you to perform humiliating or unpleasant tasks, manipulates you into feeling guilty for trivial things, criticizes your outside support system and lays the blame on you for unfortunate circumstances in his or her life.

Emotional abuse is often not even recognized by victims, as they may believe that they deserve to be treated badly. There's usually a kind of brainwashing as victims might be told by others that they are not really being mistreated, as many naive people think this kind of abuse does no lasting damage.

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In an emotionally abusive relationship a pattern gets set up where the victim starts to believe that they are to blame for the all problems in the relationship. They start to believe that they have to work harder to fix the relationship. It won't happen! You won't be able to fix your relationship because the problem is not with the victim - the abusive behavior is the problem.

Emotional abusers expect more from their spouses than they are willing to put into a relationship. Remember no matter how much you give, it will never be enough, because the abuser will expect more. For them the relationship isn't about love, it's about control.

Emotionally abusive behavior is as damaging as all other types of abuse, and you deserve to find and receive help. Remember that you are not in any way responsible for the abuse; in the end, it is the abuser's choice to abuse you. Will you go along with it?

Are you tired of living in a relationship in which you feel neglected? Many married people find themselves feeling alone and rejected by their spouse. If you feel taken for granted, there's a way to change that now.

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If your marriage is on the brink of divorce and you're looking for ways to save your marriage then this article may offer some friendly and useful advice. It's far too common for marriages to fail simply because one or both parties get bored in the marriage and the sparks simply die out. I've outlined 7 ways for you to save your marriage and get out of the marriage rut in this article and hope they are of help to you and yours.

Have a weekly date night. If budget is tight then don't worry. If you have kids, have a church member or family member watch the kids for you. Simply stay in your home and have a game night. Play checkers, Sorry, Battleship or whatever games you like. If the weather is nice, play games outdoors.

Design one room in your home to be a peaceful room. If you don't have one room in your home that is free of clutter, then spend time together a make one room in your home clutter free. Spend about 15 minutes a day in this peaceful room. Feeling relaxed and calm will not only help you, it'll help your marriage as well.

Write a love letter to your spouse and mail it to them (preferably next day air with USPS). Don't put a return address on it either. Write a letter telling your spouse how in love with them you are. Think about all the things about your spouse you loved when you first met and talk about them in the letter. When you're finished, simply drop the letter in the mail and wait for his/her response. You'll be amazed at what that one letter can do to save your marriage.

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Set aside time one evening to make plans for your future together. Talk about what each of you want in life and make an action plan to accomplish these plans. Then examine where you are in your life and how you can help your partner get to where he/she wants. As Zig Ziglar says, "you can have everything you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want".

Spend at least 10 minutes a day with your spouse and talk about your day together. Make this a habit. Don't go to bed together until this has been accomplished. It doesn't have to be a drag. You can make it fun. Go for a walk together, talk over dinner, watch the sun set (or sun rise). But devote 10 minutes a day to your partner and watch your marriage grow. You'll be glad you did.

Do something new each day. It could be simple like take a new route to work, cook a new dish, watch a new T.V show together, plant some flowers. These simple little things will make your day different and help you get out of marriage rut. And don't forget flowers. Buy flowers for your spouse (men too). A simple $7.00 bouquet of flowers will make your spouse feel appreciated and special, so why not do it.

The seventh way to save your marriage and get out of a marriage rut I learned from an Elder at my church. Here's what he said... "Find out all the things she likes...and do all of them. Then, find out the things she does not like... and don't do any of them". It sounds so simple, yet it's so true. Odds are after you've been married for several years you've developed habits that your spouse doesn't like. Eventually, this will turn your spouse off and he or she will think less of you and become less attracted to you. That's an area in marriage you don't want to be, I can assure you. So stop doing the things your spouse doesn't like and do a lot of the things your spouse does like.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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Love your spouse - the Secret Of love in marriage. Love is blind and it wins all. Love is a wonderful gift from God, it makes one feel special and multiplies joy, it is kind, thoughtful and adds spice to life. You might be wondering how this works out, it is simply by falling deeply in love again with your spouse. The question is how? It might be lingering in your mind. I wonder where the first love goes after marriage. Have you ever flashed back how life used to be when you were newly married? With all the sweet words and wonderful treatment, love was at its climax. How you used to hold her like a baby, call her sweet names such as sweet heart, baby, honey and so on. Now the fire of love died out and the spark that used to ignite you is dead. True love remains forever green, it does not grow weary because it takes no effort, it doesn't grow old because it knows no conditions, it cares, bears and goes on and on. So, if you truly meant what you used to do, love your spouse.

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Why can't you rekindle your love flame and love your spouse? Love ends when you stop caring and sharing. Allocate time for your spouse without interruptions of any activities. Take holiday outings together and get time to share views and opinions that would keep your moves better and improve your love life. To show love to your spouse, you may do extra-ordinary things that would re-ignite the love that you had towards your spouse. Spoil your spouse by surprising her with such gifts that you used to offer during courtship. You may also call him/her such names that you used during your early days in marriage. To ladies, where did you take the attention that you used to give your husband before you got kids? All the attention was driven off to your kids. It is a high time you draw back that attention to him and love your spouse.

Widen your vision, develop a healthy self image and find strength in adversity within your spouse. Refresh the good old memories that used to re-light and sets power in appreciation. Learn to appreciate every single thing that your spouse does to you even though small. Courtesy costs nothing but means a lot, learn to use such words as please, sorry and excuse when addressing your spouse. Learn to love your spouse under all conditions regardless of the hardships and the mountains and valleys you might be crossing together.

Take your spouse to such places that you used to go when in courtship such as cinemas and dancing halls. Do crazy things that you used to do while young in love such as kissing, dancing together, playing and so on. By doing this you will be strengthening the bond of love that
is between you and you will be showing your spouse how much you love him/her. Rekindle your love flame and love your spouse once more.

Now Listen Carefully-

Take 2 minutes to visit the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will make your spouse love you for the rest of their lives even if they are this close to walking out the door. Yes, you can indeed save your marriage no matter how hopeless the situation seems. Take the right step now and live to enjoy a blissful marriage. I strongly urge you to visit the next page- Click Here