She Wants Out Of Marriage: How To Make Things Right With Your Wife

Your wife stormed out of the house with her packed luggage and this time you start to think, "Is it too late to save my marriage? Is my marriage dead? My wife has left me, what should I do?"

It is not too late to save your marriage if your wife has just left you unless she has already got married to another guy. When it comes to saving back a marriage, it is best to plan quickly because this is to avoid turning the problem bigger.

The fact is your wife has already left you, so there is no point wimping and blaming the causes to be like this. Put down all unhappiness and emotions, enough of those crying and days drowning with alcohol. All you have to do now is to get yourself ready to win your wife back if you want to save this marriage.

What if your spouse already left you? Here's how to get them back.

Calm down and reflect on your marriage. Why did she leave you? Try to recall if she has been complaining about anything unhappy recently such as your behaviour or actions. Sometimes it could also be because of many broken promises.

Once you understand the reason that is causing your wife to leave this marriage, then you have to come out with different ways of working it out and make sure that the mistakes will not happen again.

When you or your wife is finally ready to meet up again, do not show out your desperation in getting back together. Just relax and be natural. Remember, listen to what she says and control your emotions.

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Well now, if you're thinking right now "I'm an idiot husband" then well... maybe you're right. But it's no reason to beat yourself up over it. If you've caused marriage trouble don't beat yourself up over it, because you're certainly not alone.

Just look at the divorce stats and you'll see that that's true.

The thing is that we're all idiots now and then. I was a big idiot for years and years, so I know exactly how you feel. I screwed up my marriage left and right, and did it without apology. Not because I'm great and don't think I should have to apologize for my mess ups, but back then I just thought I was right. Sometimes I was, but often times I wasn't... I can admit that now.

One of the things that happens in a marriage is that when we screw up really big, we think that the marriage is over. We think that we've caused such trouble in the marriage that things can't be reversed.

I thought for years that my marriage was irreversible and that I just had to live with the way things were until I did something incredible. I made a decision. That decision was to fix my part of the marriage that I was screwing up, even if I did think that my wife was doing her fair share of messing things up.

I came to the realization that no matter how hard I tried, no matter how much arguing we did, I wasn't going to make my wife think I was right. It just wasn't going to happen. I had done enough stuff to make her extremely distant in our marriage, and emotionally unattached, and so I knew that any marriage help or marriage counseling in the traditional sense wasn't on the table.

It was time to go it alone.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

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Here's 3 Things I Did To Fix My Marriage Trouble Alone

1) The first thing I did was a lot of digging... I dug around the library, in the book stores, and online to find a source of help that would fit a person trying to fix a marriage without their spouses support. Not too easy but it is out there.

2) After being armed with the knowledge that help is out there, I stopped panicking about my troubled marriage... I realized that panicking would get me nowhere, and that I was going to come out the other end of things a better person whether or not my wife appreciated the "new" me or not. So I decided that it was up to me to change me, and that it would help me throughout all of my endeavors in life.

3)I stopped arguing... I learned ways to stop arguments in their tracks, without making matters worse and simply stopped. It was getting me nowhere fast to argue...so there was no need. It was interrupting my plans of fixing my marriage anyways.

The next important step was that I took action. I took action on what I was learning about marriage, and the real meaning of communication. Like I said, my wife wasn't in the mood to help in the beginning. She was distant, and was tired of trying. I didn't blame her one bit.

However, as I started to take action, she saw the improvements and began to follow suit. Eventually we began to use the methods that I was using together, and now our troubled marriage has turned almost completely around (I say almost because marriage or relationship is perfect).

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Frequently, husbands come to me AFTER their wife doesn't want to talk to them, rejects any form of touch or intimacy, and indicates that she feels a need to go "sort out her thoughts and find herself" in some place where her husband is NOT.

Typically, these husbands come to me in a state of "shock" because although they knew their marriage wasn't all that great, they thought it was OK enough to continue on.

But, not for their wife - for the wife, the marriage is no longer suitable enough to continue. The wife is no longer willing to continue on in the unhappy state and situation that she's in.

Usually, these husbands tell me that everything was fine in their marriage up until a few days, maybe a few weeks, sometimes a few months ago.

The thing is, men fail to understand how women generally handle problems and unhappiness differently than they do.

There are always exceptions, but most men will "externalize" a problem that's making them unhappy - they'll generally get it out in the open. And, by getting it out in the open, the problem usually somehow gets mitigated down to an acceptable level such that it's no longer considered a problem - it becomes "No big deal".

Conversely, most women will "internalize" a problem that's making them unhappy - they'll simply "stew and simmer" on the problem internally until it completely eats them up from the inside out. And, by the time the "problem" reaches the "outside world", it is a "HUGE problem" - sometimes it's so huge that it has become a "Deal breaker!"

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

And of course, as these "shocked" husbands get the "news" from their wife, they start asking her a myriad of questions like:

* What's wrong?
* What did I do?
* Did I do something to hurt you?
* What is it that you want?
* What do you want from me?
* What about us?
* Does our relationship and family mean nothing to you?
* What about our future?
* Etc.

And, as the husband peppers his wife with this barrage of questions, she finally responds with something that goes like this:

"I don't know...it's not you...it's me...I don't know what I want any more...I just need to get away so I can think!"

And, with that one response, the wife takes all the wind out of her husband's sails. The husband doesn't have a leg to stand on. There's nothing he can do.

At least, that's what it seems like to him.

Actually, there's a lot he can do...

First, he can realize that HE IS a big part of the problem. He can realize that his wife is reacting and responding to who and what he is...and it happens to be an unfavorable reaction and response. That's good news because it means there IS something HE CAN do...he can learn how to create a different reaction and response in his wife towards him.

Second, he can realize that his wife is NOT a "logical" person like he is. That means she cannot logically explain what's wrong or what she wants.

All she knows is that she doesn't "FEEL" happy...and she wants to move AWAY from the "thing" that's she FEELS is making her unhappy...her husband!

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Third, he can realize that his wife is having this response towards him because she has unmet needs - and he can quickly get to work learning what her needs are and just as quickly get to work meeting those needs.

Fourth, he can realize that his wife is having this response towards him because HE has NOT behaved and operated in such a way that his wife finds him attractive and appealing - and he can quickly get to work learning how it is that he needs to behave and operate such that his wife begins to "FEEL" differently towards him.

Let me give you an example of that last item...

Just the fact that the husband asked his wife all of the questions I listed out above, TELLS the wife...it makes it clear to her...that her husband DOES NOT know how to lead him and her to the happy, loving, and intimate "place" that she wants to be in. In her mind, she KNOWS that she wants a MAN who CAN take her to the "FEELINGS" that she wants...and if her husband is asking her how to take her to that place, then that means he isn't the MAN who can take her there. By asking these questions, a husband "operates" in a way that is unattractive and unappealing to his wife.

If you can relate to any of this, that means it's time for you to "get with it"!

You've got a short opportunity to learn what you need to learn. Your wife's clock is "ticking" and she's not interested in living "without" the feelings she wants much longer...

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Author's Bio: 

Now you can stop your divorce or lover’s rejection...even if your situation seems hopeless! Visit Stop Marriage Divorce

There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your spouse back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... Visit Save The Marriage to find out more.

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