I Love My Husband but We Fight All Time: How Do We Decide If We Should Stay Together
How to stay married especially when couples quarrel all the time. For some couples, quarreling can help to keep their relationship alive, but when it is too much, it causes communication to break down and eventually ending up in a divorce.
Here are few tips on how to stay married for quarreling couples.
Ask yourself why you like to fight with your spouse
Most people fight because they love to win and feel the power over the other spouse. They tend to have that kind of thinking, "I cannot let my partner walk over me!" Think about it, do you really feel happy about being the winner in fights? I am sure you feel angry and sad every time after a big fight.
What if your spouse already left you? Here's how to get them back.
Learn how to stop blaming
Is it really worth to blame yourself or your spouse? Blaming game will only stop you from seeing the truth. So, each time when you want to quarrel with your spouse, focus on his or her kindness for you. When you are learning how to stay married, it will require you to develop a soft spot for your spouse.
Go for a holiday
When we are too busy with our life, we will feel tired and stress. Take a break if you wish to. Go for a holiday, it can help to calm down your emotions and this will help you to communicate better with your spouse.
Choose to back off when both of you are fighting too hard
It is common to hear couples fight in a marriage. If you wish to learn how to stay married, you have to learn to fight fairly. When arguments get very intense, walk away and let the other party to cool down. This will help to control the situation temporarily, but ultimately, you must fix the problems to avoid getting more serious.
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When people reach the end of their emotional and psychological rope they invariably ask if their marriage is worth saving. Ironically, they already know intuitively they should save their marriage; they just don't know how. I have never met anyone (which doesn't mean they don't exist) who got married with the idea of ending their marriage sometime in the future. People get married to live happily ever after. Why are there so few who do?
We Live in a Very Confused Society
Everyone complains about dishonesty.
Even those who sneak into movies without paying.
Everyone complains about crooked politicians.
Even those who take advantage of their situational power.
No one thinks of themselves as a liar.
Not even those who cheat on their income tax.
Everyone thinks their marriage will work.
Even though the divorce rate is staggering.
The idea of saving your marriage is great. Trouble should create a wake-up call that prompts you to investigate everything and everywhere until you find a solution for your marital woes. In the meantime never give up on having a very happy marriage. You can save your marriage despite the flaws you find in your spouse or yourself; that is a fact. Do you think God is so cruel as to create marriage as a way to find suffering? Can you imagine God being so cruel as to create marriage only for those who are perfect? I didn't believe it and so I searched for and discovered everything needed to create or fix marriage; and you can too.
There are a number of good reasons to save your marriage:
1) Your children
Your children are not possessions. They came into your life as a blessing and a responsibility. The very foundation of a child consists of a united mother and father. Don't imagine your children will be OK if you don't save your marriage. Don't believe the lies society puts forth to rationalize "divorce on demand".
What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?
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2) Your future success
When you took your marriage vows they reflected the most serious commitment of your life - to your spouse and yourself. Giving up is contrary to the laws of success.
3) Our society
Families are the unit of measure of any society. There has been a tremendous transformation to our society as a result of the high divorce rate. There is no reasonable substitution for a family-based social order. Each individual has greater importance when he or she is part of a society of families. The obvious insecurities and fears that are strangling our country are the logical result of divorce.
If your marriage is troubled there are clear-cut reasons, rarely the ones on the surface. Like anything else marriage has a natural structure to it which must be sustained by correct behaviors. I have gone into great detail in my book Lessons For A Happy Marriage so that anyone can understand what it takes to save a marriage, no matter how awful it may appear to be. Don't give up and don't be demoralized if your current state is one of pain and suffering. You and your spouse deserve what God has created for you to enjoy.
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If you want to have a happy marriage, but you don't know what to do in order to achieve this, here are a few simple steps you can take into consideration and which can perform miracles. Nothing is easy when it comes to a marriage, but there are some little secrets you can put into practice and cope with your family problems.
Firstly, you should accept your partner as they are. In fact, this is why you fell in love with them in the first place. Don't try to change anything about them, just so that you can be happy and live your little perfect life because it will never happen. Then, you should ignore the minor problems. Don't waste time with small problems and learn to live your life because time is very precious. All the couples in the world have small problems every day, but they also have a lot of reasons to be happy. The most important thing is that you cope with your problems together.
Also, you should avoid offending your partner. Even if you fight, you shouldn't let yourself carried away and don't just waste some dreadful words you are then bound to regret.Think about how you could solve your problem without offending each other and without throwing your partner's mistakes in their face. Leave the past where it is and focus on the present. Then, there is communication, which is the main reason why so many couples have huge problems. It is essential that you communicate with your partner. Tell them what you need and what you are not discontent about. This teamwork can perform miracles for your relationship.
What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time
Also, you should remember that your family should always come first. Don't bring your problems from work with you when you come home and don't leave your family behind when you have problems at work. There is no "I", just "We" when it comes to a relationship. Once you remember this little thing, you will always know how to react and what to do in order for both of you to be happy. Then, you should always spend more time with your partner. The intimate moments are vital if you want your marriage to work and you should never forget about them. This is what a couple is mainly about.
You should always support your wife or your husband. This way, you can make them feel loved and adored and also give them some presents from time to time. Things can go so much better if you remember about presents. The kiss is also a way of expressing your affection and it can make things a lot better.
Eat together at least once a day and satisfy your whims on weekends, creating a more or less romantic atmosphere. Thank your partner whenever you have the chance because this will make then feel appreciated. Let your partner know that you are worried about their health and tell them that you love them. These are the most important two words in a relationship.
Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.
But I believe that there are marriages where you can have your pool table and she can have her scrapbooking room or garden or whatever it is. But when everyone has what they want, it's not funny. There's no conflict.
~Brad Garrett
There's little quibbling about this point. Satisfy the streaming urge within the individual and there's likely to be peace vested for the more important tasks of life. Why would we insist on frustrating the spirit of someone so dear as our partner?
Yet, we do so often because there's a short-sighted sense of getting what we want.
Many marriages rail at this very point. There is, for some strange reason, or maybe not so strange, a rationale for gathering the thing we 'need', personally. These things we're duped into thinking we cannot do without. In fact, we go there without thought; without challenge, we argue our own case. We need to be aware of it. Each, instead, could arrange room for those needs of, and for, the other.
The commonest sticking points could well be the same prattling things we were supposed to iron out in the first year or two.
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THE BEAUTY OF THE BETTER VIEW
Better views are afforded the couple spending time identifying and quickly meeting, with good effect, these basic personal needs. Whatever's important to them needs to be the thing that's important to us. There has to be sufficient space containing the marriage in order that both partners have salubrious room for individual expression, and mutual appreciation if nothing more than for freedom.
Barriers to ordinary happiness are more than barriers to survival; they impel us toward a dearth of living experience where the heart shrinks and the spirit is contrived beyond its natural, comfortable self. The very institution that was supposed to actualise us - each partner, and the couple as a whole - has failed us, or we failed it.
Once we get the ordinary things out of the way, our individual and collective perspectives open; a marvellous - mutually inclusive - vista becomes apparent.
There's no reason not to dream; every married person of a good mind, surely, wants the best for themselves, their partner, and the unity of their marriage.
A vision to believe in: of mutual acceptance and the gracious provision of freedom.
An image: We sit together on the park bench of life happily content with existence, and with each other, as we're both personally disposed and within our togetherness.
Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.
You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.
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Looking for love and romance can be challenging. Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com
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