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Are you a person who has experienced being tuned into
your spiritual Guidance, yet you frequently forget to check in, especially in times of anxiety and stress?_______________________________________________________
Gerald was raised ... Views: 828
If you are hard on yourself, do you believe that this is helpful to you? You might want to re-evaluate this false belief.
Are you hard on yourself? Do you think this is a good thing? Do you believe this motivates you to do better? Think again. If you are doing well, it's likely in ... Views: 1166
Do you hide from your feelings when you are challenged by life? Or do you allow your feelings to overwhelm you? You CAN learn to manage them and learn from them.
"The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles." ~ Bernard M. Baruch
"How ... Views: 1433
Are you limiting your life – allowing fear to stop you from doing what brings you joy?
"There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." ~Nelson Mandela
Do you feel passionate about your ... Views: 1243
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Do you believe that you want a relationship but never seem to find the 'right one?'
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Most people say they want to be in a relationship, yet they consistently do things that keep them from achieving this. If you ... Views: 1160
You might not think you are selling your soul, but is this true?
What have you given up for money and possessions?
Have you given up kindness to get ahead?
Have you given up family time for a bigger TV?
Have you given up fun for a new car?
Have you given up hobbies for a ... Views: 1513
Do you sometimes feel trapped with some who wants to be listened to but doesn't want to listen to you?
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One of the common complaints I hear from my clients is that they listen well but they end up just listening and never being heard.
This is the ... Views: 1098
Do you know how to discern when someone is being transparent and authentic and when they are being duplicitous?
We seem to be living in a time when authenticity and transparency are not highly valued. We have only to look at government and many government agencies such as the FDA, politics, ... Views: 2254
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Breaking down keeps you stuck, while breaking open allows you to discover the power within yourself.
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"Something I didn't want to happen, happens. I feel the resistance build within. I feel the pressure to ... Views: 2448
"Science has finally confirmed what anyone who's ever been in love already knows: Heartbreak really does hurt." www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/03/28/burn.heartbreak.same.to.brain/index.html"In a new study using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), researchers have found that the same brain ... Views: 2360
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Sometimes we are clueless regarding the subtle ways we are trying to control, while being very aware of a partner's controlling behavior.
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Tara asked me the following question:
"Dear Dr. Paul, How do you ... Views: 1314
Is your experience of love that it is scarce and limited?
"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Love never decreases by being shared. ~Chinese Proverb
There seems to be a myth that love is scarce – that ... Views: 2406
What is loving to yourself and others is not always clear. This article presents some important questions to consider.
"Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you." Wayne Dyer, Author ... Views: 1637
Many people have the ability to truly care and receive joy when caring from the heart. Yet even very caring people sometimes find themselves using caring as a form of control.
Take a moment right now to think about a situation today in which you were caring - at home, at work, with a friend, ... Views: 2398
Dating provides many opportunities to learn and grow. Discover some of what you can learn that will be very valuable for you.
Franklin writes:
"I am a 68 year old male who was married for 27 years and now divorced 15 years. I have fallen in love with a woman after only three ... Views: 1302
Do you understand the power of kindness to change your life?
"Extend to each person, no matter how trivial the contact, all the care and kindness and understanding and love that you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same ... Views: 1484
Think about the last time you had a conflict with someone and you argued - with your partner, your friend, your parent, your child, or someone else in your life.
What did you argue about, and why did you spend your energy arguing or fighting?
Reasons for Arguing and Fighting
Here are some of ... Views: 3073
As social beings, our desire for connection is a deep and powerful force within us. Babies who do not experience connection with a caregiver do not thrive or may even die. Deep connection with another is one of the greatest joys in life.
Yet for many people, this deep and joyous connection ... Views: 2746
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We all deeply desire connection with others, but what is necessary for us to have this?
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When we were born, the most important thing to us was connection with our mother. We needed connection with her body for ... Views: 1359
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
March 14, 2016
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It is often tempting to tell others what to do, especially when it is obvious that they are not taking care of themselves. Discover why this usually backfires and what ... Views: 1596
___________________________________________________________________Do you have the courage to do the things you are afraid of, or do you allow fear to stop you?___________________________________________________________________
"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the ... Views: 1511
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
Like anything worth learning, developing the habit of loving takes practice. As you practice Inner Bonding, your brain develops the habit of loving.
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." ~ Aristotle
All of us develop ... Views: 1119
Do you sometimes find yourself resisting receiving love because you believe you don't deserve it?
Have you ever heard yourself say, "I'm not worthy of love," or "I'm not worth loving," or "I'm unworthy of God's love"? I frequently hear this from my ... Views: 1177
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How often do you feel one-up or one-down in comparison to others?
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When you were growing up, did your parents compare you to others? Were you compared to siblings or other family members? Did your parents ... Views: 1079
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What was valued and approved of in your family as you were growing up?
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When you were growing up, how did you learn to define your worth? Here are some of the things my clients have said to me:
• In my ... Views: 1216
Learn how to embrace life as the sacred privilege it is rather than be stuck just getting through.
Peter experiences life as a burden - a sentence to get through that is filled with suffering. Peter trudges through his life, experiencing little joy. He works hard, makes enough money to feel ... Views: 1417
Has having patience been a challenge for you? Discover an underlying cause of impatience.
Some people seem to be naturally patient. I'm not one of those people. I think I was born impatient.
I have spent a lot of time cultivating having patience and trying to understand what triggers me ... Views: 1090
By Margaret Paul, PhD
January 31, 2017
Discover why it takes great courage to learn to love yourself, and why it's so important to make loving yourself one of your highest priorities.
Loving Yourself"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more ... Views: 1192
Does the fear of making a mistake immobilize you when you need to make a decision?
Do you ever have trouble making decisions? Which rug to buy for your floor? Which couch to choose? What color to paint your walls? What you feel like doing on your days off? What kind of work you ... Views: 1043
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
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Do you often see people as you want them to be rather than as they are? Has this caused you problems in your relationships?
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“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ... Views: 1033
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Pressuring yourself might be causing resistance, stress, anxiety, physical pain, insomnia and even illness.
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How many of you put a lot of pressure on yourself? How often do you feel anxious because of this ... Views: 1299
Discover why any kind of engaging when someone is angry is a waste of energy.
"Rage can…shut off the hippocampus [linked to memory], and people with out-of-control anger may not be lying when they say they don't recall what they said or did in that altered state of ... Views: 1040
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Where does your mind generally go - to the obstacles or to the goal? You CAN change your mindset if it is stopping you from having what you want.
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Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your ... Views: 1777
Do you really see your children? If you operate from core shame and cannot see the beauty of your own essence, your children will not feel seen by you. Yet they need to be seen by you to truly value themselves.
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One of the things I loved doing as a ... Views: 1404
Are you aware of the feelings you cause yourself when you attempt to control others rather than love yourself?
"I have never been able to conceive how any rational being could propose happiness to himself from the exercise of power over others." - Thomas ... Views: 1183
Do you find that nothing really excites you or holds much meaning for you? Does your life lack aliveness, passion and purpose?
Vera sought out counseling with me because her doctor advised her to discover the emotional causes of her chronic fatigue. Vera, a successful stockbroker, was in a ... Views: 1146
Have you decided that you are not creative? Do you feel a deadness regarding creativity?
“Everything about the way we start our day runs counter to the best conditions for thinking creatively,” wrote Annie Murphy Paul in an article entitled “Why Morning Routines Are Creativity Killers.” ... Views: 1874
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Do you get stuck not knowing what to say or do when your partner treats you disrespectfully?
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Louise asked me:
"Do you have any suggestions on what to say when my husband says unloving words to me in front ... Views: 1118
Discover how to manage panic in a way that allows it to dissipate rather than escalate.
"That's the strange thing about panic – when we lean into it, it loosens it's grip on us." Daniel Siegel, M.D.
"The power of reflection allows us to approach, rather than ... Views: 1149
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***Fear Of Death - by Margaret Paul, Ph.D., the Official Guide To Marriage
"The modern tradition of equating death with an ensuing nothingness can be abandoned. For there is no reason to believe that human death severs the quality of the oneness in the universe." - Larry Dossey, MD
Kenny, a client of mine, told me that his mother had a stroke and has been left totally ... Views: 3551
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***Fear Of Failure - by Margaret Paul, Ph.D., the Official Guide To Marriage
Failure! What do you feel when you think about failure? Inadequate? Unworthy? Unlovable? It is so sad that you might have learned to link failure to your value as a person.
Most people who are successful in their work and their relationships have experienced many failures along their road to ... Views: 2757
What do you believe about failure?
The ego wounded part of ourselves, the left-brain part of ourselves that has been programmed with many false beliefs, often believes that:
"If I fail, I am a failure."
"If I fail, I am stupid."
"If I fail, no one will like me or value me."
"If I fail, then ... Views: 2822
"We can't seem to connect anymore."This is one of the most common complaints I hear in my counseling practice.We all know that it is generally easy to connect at the beginning of a relationship - before all the protections and defenses come up. But what do you do to reconnect once you ... Views: 5884
“A new analysis concludes that spanking fails to alter kids' behavior in the long term. What it does instead is amp up their aggression.” From “Why Spanking Doesn’t Work,” by Bonnie Rochman |@brochman | February 6, 2012
http://healthland.time.com/2012/02/06/why-spanking-doesnt-work/?hpt=hp_t3 ... Views: 3012
We are all geniuses. Are you ready to find your genius?
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” ~ Albert Einstein
Did you know that everybody is a genius? I love this quote by Einstein because ... Views: 3312
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Are you seeking the formula for attracting the partner of your dreams? Here it is!
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Rochelle asks:
"If I assess myself quite objectively, if I know my accomplishments as well as my drawbacks, is there a ... Views: 1218
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Dating is challenging for many. Here are some tips to turn it into a learning adventure.
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Sometimes, dating can be discouraging, or it can be a learning experience. One of the things I encourage my dating ... Views: 2665
How long should your child breast-feed?
Should your child go to pre-school?
Should your child sleep with you or by him or herself?
What about home-schooling vs. attending school?
Most people who choose to have children want to be good parents, and they have many questions about what would be ... Views: 2225
Do you have problems having truly connected friendships?
Friendship is a big topic. There are people who always seem to have many friends, and others who can't seem to find the way to make friends. Some people have deeply connected friendships, and others have only superficial ... Views: 1184
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
February 15, 2016
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The state of Divine Grace is a most wonderful experience, and it's available to all of us – even if you are an atheist. ... Views: 1333