As someone who grew up cited as “phoebically shy and a stutterer I shocked most of my high school colleague when I was invited to speak, five years later at their annual state conference, coming back as some one who’d become a Wall Street journal journalist. In fact, when I walked in to give my speech, many who knew me in the audience looked started then laughed at me. My core message in my talk and life was-- and is -- the enormous benefits of having attracted extremely diverse allies with different talents, experience and temperaments. They included a pro football star, an Italian investigative reporter and a scientist. In fact that’s how I was able to became a public speaker on connective behaior and quotabiity. And I have seen that seeral Sausalito Yacht Clu members share those values and skills. So here’s some specific tips that can help us all.

Recognize the value of getting specific sooner with the specific detail, example or story that can prove a general conclusion yet not the reverse. Your specificity spurs your message’s credibility and memorability. Contemplate things that are most important to you so you can be more specific in citing them. Your early specificity is the straightest path towards greater clarity, credibility and memorability
Make Your Message (Almost) as Vital as A.I.R. Actionable, Interestingness & Relevance and Actionable.
Make your message bring out the better side in others and they are more like to feel, see and respond to your best sides. That trait works in friendships and in even in business actions. . For example, instead of criticizing Texans for dumping garbage on the roadside, a Texas public service campaign appealed to their Texans pride for their state by offering this pride-evoking, behavior-changing and actionable slogan, on their road signs: “Don’t mess with Texas.”

One Way to bring out others’ better side so they naturally see yours: when the spotlight’s on you, specifically shine it on them too by citing their positive, related action.
Also to get to know someone better ask follow-up questions. This evokes several mutual benefits: You can gain a deeper, more accurate understanding of what they meant and why plus you demonstrate an interest in the other person which spur that person to feel the same. And understanding eah other better spurs greater closeness plus enables you to attract diverse allies. And diverse allies – with different areas of expertise can collectively see more sides of a situations, including a potential problem or opportunity and can then make smarter decisions faster together, and thus for each other. Such experiences draw us closer and more aware of our complementary talents we can provide each other and be motivated to do so. That can put you on the path, early on to find a sweet spot of mutual interest that can help you, with others: growing a mutual motivation to learn from each other and help each other.
Hint: adopt a mutuality mindset.
One way to strengthen your relationships: Here’s the good news: If you practice speaking first about the other person’s interests, then about what you share in common, and only then about how that commonality relates to your interests, four amazingly powerful changes occur in how that other person relates to you. The person listens sooner, listens longer, remembers more, and assumes you have a higher IQ than if you first speak about your own interests.
Make it a habit, especially in potentially difficult situations, to speak to their positive intent, especially when they appear to have none. You are more likely to bring out their better side. Then they’re more likely to see yours.
Ways to Become More Frequently Quoted
Create A Captivating Turn Of Phrase Here’s three ways.
A. Use a familiar word in a new way and become associated with a new trend. Example: Futurist, Faith Popcorn, predicted five years ago that people would want to be “cocooning” in their home.
B. Be catchy, using one or more of these memorabiity-building devices:
Alliteration: “Peak performance” and “high tech/high touch.”Rhyme: “Jaws on Paws” (from earlier story)
Repetition: “First things first”, Steve Covey’s advice.
Puns: Tongue Fu!, title of book by Sam Horn.
C. Employ an unexpected turns of phrase: For example, I suggest that to forge a connection, “go slow to go fast.
Make Favorable Comparisons With Familiar, Admired Objects
Say it so they can see it in their mind’s eye. When people in your work world are immersed in jargon, your remarks can stand out from others, when you make a comparison with a well-liked product, person or situation from outside your profession or industry.
Example: At the high stakes J.P. Morgan Healthcare investors’ conference, venture capitalists hear 20-minutes talks by CEOs of start-ups and public companies who seek funding or favorable stock analysts’ reporters. The tension is high and the schedule is packed. Most presenters speak fast, using a mix of highly technical scientific and finance language. The CEO from bio-tech company, Amgen, walked past the podium to the center of the stage, pulled up one suit and shirt sleeve to bare his raised forearm. He opened his talk, saying, ” You will feel the effects of this medical patch faster than it takes a Porsche to go from zero to 90. ”

Author's Bio: 

Kare Anderson is an Emmy-winning former NBC and Wall Street Journal reporter, now connective behavior and quotability speaker, author and columnist for Forbes. Anderson’s TED talk on The Web of Humanity: Be an Opportunity Maker has attracted over 2.5 million views. Her clients are as diverse as Salesforce, Novartis, and The Skoll Foundation. She was a founding board member of Annie’s Homegrown, co-founder of nine political PACs, and author of Mutuality Matters, Moving From Me to We, Getting What You Want, and Resolving Conflict Sooner.
Anderson serves on the advisory boards of The Business Innovation Factory, Gloopt, TEDxMarin and World Affairs Council Marin.
As David Rockefeller Jr. said after hearing her speak, “Kare forever changes how you see yourself and your world.”