Choosing What You Want For 2008

January is often a time when people are reflecting on the past year and setting goals for the new year (or for some, beating themselves up for what they didn’t do last year, cringing at what they did do and begrudgingly stating that they’re never going to set goals again!). But setting goals is really about making choices. Choosing to continue on the same path or choosing a new direction. It can be specific choices like choosing a new job, choosing to do your job differently, choosing social and recreational activities to take part in and so on. Or it can be less tangible like setting your intention to have more ease in your life, more money, more time for yourself etc. and being open to the opportunities that support this.

I’ve discovered that in order to do this, I need to acknowledge that where I am right now is a choice – even with the places, people and situations I’m not happy with. When we’re not consciously choosing where we are, we can be stuck in resistance or caught in victimhood. A lot of energy gets sapped in either of these two states. Think about it – if you’re resisting something you’re in effort, and if your feeling like a victim of your circumstances your energy is weighted down in hopelessness. In reality, wherever we are right now and whatever we’re doing is a choice. And we can choose again at any time.

Sometimes we want to deny that we have a choice, but then we feel powerless. Even if our options seem limited, there is still a choice - it may be between the lesser of two evils, but acknowledging that you are in the role of choosing feels more empowering. Then your energy is freed up from resisting or complaining and can be used to create new choices in your life.

Here are some insightful questions to ponder:

• What are you choosing in your life right now that you are happy with?

• What are you choosing in your life right now that you are not happy with?

• What choices would you like to make for yourself this year?

• For the choices you are happy with, what must you believe about yourself in order to have created this in your life?

• For the places where you feel stuck in your choices, what are your underlying beliefs about this situation? What are your underlying beliefs about yourself?

Here are some inspiring ideas to try:

• Often our choices in life arise out of our belief systems. You’ve heard the saying “if you believe you can you will and if you believe you can’t you won’t”. Once you’ve explored your beliefs (particularly core beliefs about yourself) that are positive and support you in having what you want in life, you can build on this by reminding yourself about these. Try writing them down and then have them ready to read over when your feeling disempowered – it’s a great way to pick yourself up again.

• For the beliefs you uncovered that are negative or limiting you in what you want to have or do for yourself, ask yourself where these came from and if they are really true or not. Beliefs are another thing we can choose. Most beliefs have been passed on to us from our families, teachers and society or from early experiences as we were growing up. Many of them are unconscious and run the way we live our lives. Once we become conscious of them, we can re-choose what we want to believe and what we know down deep is true for ourselves.

• Try making a list of what you want to believe and imagine moving into the future with these beliefs. What will your life be like, how will you feel? Reading over this list regularly will help to de-program the limiting beliefs you hold and reset your certainty and confidence for creating what you truly want in your life.

“We are what we think
All that we are arises with our thoughts
With our thoughts we create the world”
Buddha