Time for Exercise: five to 10 minutes

Properties Required: none


  1. Sit comfortably facing each other.
  2. Look into each other’s eyes.
  3. Inhale and exhale slowly and deeply together, in rhythm.
  4. The man leads the rhythm for 12 full breaths as the woman follows by matching her breathing to his.
  5. Switch. The woman leads for 12 full breaths as the man follows by matching his breathing to hers.


    • Circular Breathing: As the man inhales, the woman exhales. Follow this circular rhythm for another 12 slow, deep breaths. Switch again. The woman sets the rhythm, inhaling while the man exhales for 12 breaths.
    • Match your breathing rhythms when you are slow dancing (see Yin Yang Yes! p. 174).


      Do not speak during these exercises. Just be present in the moment. There is nothing to do, nowhere to get to, nothing to explain.

      These breathing techniques are excellent ways to begin lovemaking. They effectively stop the world, helping you let go of the demands of your busy lives and become grounded in the present moment together. At peaks of sexual arousal, gazing into each other’s eyes and breathing in unison takes your connection out of this world (see Yab-yum Yum). Breathing in harmony is also an excellent way to bridge from arguing to making up.

      Excerpted from our new book Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms of Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, Llewellyn, 2007

Author's Bio: 

Al Link and Pala Copeland own and operate 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra. They regularly host lover’s romantic weekends near Ottawa Canada, and weeklong retreats in exotic locations. For more information call toll free from Canada or USA: 1-800-684-5308 International long distance: 1-819-689-5308. Visit their websites www.tantra-sex.com, www.sexyspiritualrelationships.com and their blog www.askaboutloveandsex.com or send email: 4freedoms@tantraloving.com They have four books published including Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, New Page, 2003; The Complete Idiot's Guide to Supercharged Kama Sutra, Penguin, 2007; Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms Body, Heart, Mind and Soul, Llewellyn 2007; Tantra Step by Step: 28 Days to Ecstasy, Llewellyn 2007.

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