Husband Talks To Others But Not Me: Husband Talks To Everyone Except Me

When we communicate it means we are explaining our inner thoughts and our view on a particular situation. When we are communicating, what we say may not actually align with what is in our mind.

However, when the listener puts together our body language and words, they can almost certainly deduce what we are really communicating! Have you ever said something then realised that you meant to say something very different?

Communication and communicating can be a very demanding exercise but it isn't that hard to understand. If you want to save your marriage, then you must get this part right!

Relationships survive because of good communication. Whenever spouses recognise and understand what is in their partner's psyche, the relationship is usually a very easy one. Such as, when one partner is rather quiet. That certainly communicates something. This must be understood by the other partner. When both partners recognize the hidden clues and the exact significance of what is being said, they are able to establish a balanced relationship.

Generally speaking, men and women feel a lot better about themselves if they believe that they are understood by those that they communicate with. Understandably, (and who can blame them), they become annoyed if they're not understood by others. Regardless of their own poor conversation, deep down, they want to be understood by those they are communicating with.

This is the key to communication and any relationship, be it personal or business.

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Some relationships develop despite the poor communication to start with. The exhilaration both partners felt at the beginning of the relationship can hide any communication shortfalls. As is often said, "love is blind" However, deficiencies in communication will rise to the surface as soon as the passion settles down. Everyday life starts to intrude in the relationship.

If you experience poor communication with your spouse, then the most sensible action you can take is to talk to your partner. Don't assume what your partner might be thinking, or what might be wrong.

Try starting off with something like...

"Darling, I'm having problems with what you are trying to say. Can you please say it again, maybe using different words?"

It will help if you are genuine when you ask. Don't be condescending or spiteful.

Be aware of some nonverbal signals that your spouse may display e.g.

- A loud voice may indicate that they may not feel heard or maybe they are becoming angry towards you.

- Not making eye contact may be due to them not being interested in what you have to say.

- Folded arms are a classic indicator that they are closed off to you or any new ideas.

However, communication can be very effective when actions accompany your words. For example:

- Touch your spouse on the arm or hand when you ask them to listen to you or do something. This will get their interest right away and will put them in a more receptive mood to listen to what you want to say to them.

- Try to have your partner empathise with what you are asking them. If he or she can put themselves in your shoes then I'd say that you have communicated very well!

Above all, show your spouse that you simply want to understand them. If you use the above approaches and support your partner, then your communication and relationship will greatly improve.

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I was looking for ways on how to avoid a divorce when my marriage was on the brink of collapse. I know the pains of seeing your once happy marriage turn into a crumbling, unhappy mess. But it's not impossible to fix a marriage, regardless of how bad things are. I saved my marriage, and so can you. In this article I will lay out certain ways to rebuild your marriage when your spouse doesn't want you anymore.

The first step on how to avoid a divorce is to set it straight that you are going to change. If you have to fix your marriage, it's obvious that this "you" is not the way to go. You have to inspect yourself closely and be willing to make changes in order to attract your spouse again emotionally. When you sense that your partner doesn't love you anymore (or at least not as much as they once did), you can get angry, because you still feel the same love as in the beginning, and feel their inability to stay in love is their fault. However, in most cases this is not true. Preventing a divorce can never be accomplished by blaming your spouse! I cannot stress how incredibly important this is. Your spouse's feelings for you, and attraction towards you, can and do change according to your behavior. Never take your spouse for granted. Love doesn't stay in a person all by itself forever - it needs to be actively maintained. So, instead of blaming your spouse, focus on their good points. Be encouraging and supportive. Fixing your marriage Avoiding a divorce can be done only if your spouse knows (and believes) how much you appreciate this marriage (and your spouse). So, make an effort about this and repair your image.

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A marriage's most important organ is the communication between spouses. And the lack of communication can quickly undo even the most happy, loving, intimate and desirable of relationships. Maintaining a relationship is hard. Everyday life is hard. A marriage combines a relationship with everyday life - so it is extra hard! So how to avoid a divorce? By interacting and communicating. Things like bills, household problems and children can cause a lot of friction between you and your spouse even if you truly love each other. Those frictions cause fights. And if you have had a lot of fights, you and your spouse both instinctively may have chosen to have stopped communicating because you know that it will end up in another fight.

However, if you want to avoid a divorce, communication is the key. So, if there are any ongoing fights or issues, you have to deal with them. Most of the time this means you have to compromise, and you must do that. When you compromise and the fix the ongoing issues, the lines of communication will open again and this will go a long way in fixing your marriage and avoiding a divorce.

Even if both spouses love each other sincerely, at times they might find themselves getting more and more distant from each other and getting close to a divorce. But like me, you too can take some steps into saving your marriage and turning it into a satisfying relationship.

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An acquaintance of mine, who thinks of me as a "Marriage Guru," asked me for some advice to help him re-energize his marriage. I shared with him examples of what others are doing to freshen their own marital relationships.

To which he replied, and I speak verbatim, "If I share your examples with her, my wife will expect me to do the things you are telling me".

What a sad, sad state of affairs. He basically acknowledged that my ideas were sound; he just wasn't interested in improving his marriage.

This statement then got my mind whirling for the past few days, trying to understand the root of such a remark and how my learnings can be shared with you.

What I discovered is that change is based on three things happening. If one of them does not take place, then the marriage will not improve.

#1- The people involved must want to change
#2- You must understand the roots of the problem
#3- There must be some form of accountability to ensure progress and success

You see, this is why I believe that things like weight loss programs do not work.

The person may want to lose weight (#1), so they go to the weight loss clinic. There is accountability (#2), as the person must count their calories and exercise every day, then report the results to their "coach". But what is not addressed is the root of the problem. Why is this person overweight? Are there emotional or psychological issues that have caused the person to overeat? Perhaps these issues have gone away temporarily, or not been top of mind while focusing on the weight loss regimen. But then, at some point in the not too distant future, these "issues" resurface and the person goes back into a psychological state where they use food for comfort or as an outlet for their problems? As the weight loss clinics do not deal with the root of the problem, just the accountability, this is why I believe that most people that lose weight regress and gain it all back again.

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So how does this theory apply to marriage?

In the story at the top, the person clearly does not have an interest in changing. There are issues in the marriage that he simply does not choose to address. So no matter what he reads, understands or is held accountable, he will not work to improve his marriage.

But for the "average" couple, if there is such a thing, they simply need to reawaken the love and friendship in the marriage. It is not that they hate each other; it is just that they have gotten themselves into a rut and don't know how to get out of it.

That is where simple exercises can help them recognize what they need from each other and work on those things to rekindle the flame.

The problem with most couples is that they want to change and may be able to figure out the root of their problem. It is the accountability factor that prohibits them from completing the circle.

It is so easy to say to your wife that you will make a conscious effort to do this or that, but what happens? We are so busy with work and raising the kids that we may focus on the change factors for a day or two, if lucky, and then get right back into the old routine.

This is where some type of coach can be the key to actualizing the desired change of behavior and seeing real improvement in the marriage. A coach can complete the loop with accountability.

I will add that if a coach sees that the issues between the couple are beyond his scope and may require professional help, he will make that recommendation too.

So when you are thinking about how you can improve your marriage, don't just think about wanting to change and understanding what is wrong, find a way to be held accountable.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

Click here to save your marriage and rebuild it into a more connected, satisfying relationship.

When your marriage is in crisis, emotions run high and anger and tension build fast. Below are a few things that a lot of couples do that will actually hurt the marriage further. By learning what NOT to do, you will better understand what you CAN do, that will HELP your marriage to overcome these obstacles.

You have to fix it immediately

You can face your problems immediately, but having a blissful marriage tomorrow just isn't going to happen. It CAN happen, just not immediately. Just as it took time for your marriage to get this bad, it will take time for it to get better.

The Blame Game

Your marriage is having problems right now. One of the easiest things for people to do when problems arise is to blame it on someone else. The hard part is accepting the fact that there is a problem, and learning how to address it and fix it. When you blame your spouse or yourself, it will only make the problem worse.

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If your spouse has already given up on your marriage, then all hope is lost:

You can't control how someone else feels, even your spouse. You CAN control how you choose to react to his or her feelings, though. Even if your spouse has given up, and you truly believe that your marriage is worth fighting for, then do it!

Marriage takes strength and commitment. When a marriage starts to have problems, it is easier to run away from them than it is to deal with them. You have to believe, with all your heart, that these problems CAN be resolved.

When you keep a positive attitude, it is very likely to rub off onto your spouse.

When there is a problem in the marriage, talk to your spouse. Listen to their side. Come up with a solution together.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com