My Husband Is Confused About Our Marriage: My Husband Isn't Sure If He Really Wants A Divorce
Though you might 'sense' that there is something grossly wrong with your marriage, you can never be sure. It could be some issue completely unrelated to marriage that is bothering your spouse that is affecting your relationship. Even then, it is painful to live with such uncertainties; you want to be sure that your spouse still feels the same way about you and that all is well between the two of you. But, how do you know when your marriage is over?
Actually, it is not all that difficult, because the signs and symptoms of a failed relationship cannot be kept hidden for too long. Here are some tell-tale signs that go a long way to confirm your doubts. The whole idea to become aware of these signals early on is that the earlier you know, the better chances you have to recover the situation from deteriorating further:
How do you know when your marriage is over? It is on the verge of collapse unless not failed completely already, when there is a complete breakdown of communication. You could be talking about kids; school fees or about filling up gas in your car - but this is not the type of communication which can pull along a marriage. Watch out for the quality and quantity of communication you have with your spouse. Is it diminishing by the day? Remember communication holds the key to resolving a wide range of disputes and conflicts in a relationship. So if communication is erratic, then either or both of you are holding up emotions within you and that is dangerous in the long run.
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How do you know when your marriage is over? It is over when everything about your spouse irritates or offends you. You talk in riddles and no longer support each other. There is a constant one-upmanship that is happening round the clock.
Think hard whether you are living with your spouse as friends or competitors. Is there any semblance of the term 'compromise' still left in the marriage? Do you still understand each other's unsaid words? Do you feel like coming back home to be with your spouse? Does the thought of a weekend send shivers up your spine? If you no longer appreciate the company of your spouse - you know that your marriage is in serious trouble.
To answer your question how do you know when your marriage is over, the only redeeming point is that if you truly love and respect your spouse, you can still make efforts to revive the marriage and put it back on tracks. But the intention has to be mutual.
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You thought your marriage was OK - there may have been problems, but you could handle them. All of sudden, your spouse tells you that he doesn't love you anymore. Why stay married when your spouse tells you he is not in love with you? Here are a few ways to find out if he really doesn't love you, or if there is something else going on.
Relationships struggle sometimes. There is no way around it. Marriage troubles seem to be harder to deal with, but you can always solve problems in any relationship. When some people are under a lot of stress, they withdraw into themselves. Others need to talk about what is bothering them.
If you know he confides in his family and friends, go and talk to them. Tell them that you are afraid your marriage is falling apart, and he told you that he doesn't love you. This may be the truth, but it may very well be a way to hide the truth from you. If he has a different problem, he may think the easiest way to solve it is to get out of the relationship.
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His family and friends will know his true feelings. Even if he doesn't say much, they will see his eyes when they talk about you. Eyes tell the truth better than anything. If you are close to his family and friends, try to see if there are other things bothering him, so you can talk to him about them.
Tell him that you know he is going through some hard times, and that you are there for him. Let him know that he can share anything with you, and that you will be there, when he's ready.
What does it feel like when you're together? If you still feel like there is love there (even a little bit), then there is. It may just be buried under a pile of stress. Talk to your spouse about what is wrong, and then talk to them about how to fix it. Maybe they don't want to burden you with their problems, and they are trying to do it on their own.
The two of you loved each other enough to get married. That love is very deep - it does NOT just go away. Even couples who have gone through a terrible divorce still feel love for each other. There are many things that can make someone feel like they are incapable of loving someone anymore, and things that can be done to bring that love back into your marriage.
Are you tired of living in a relationship in which you feel neglected? Many married people find themselves feeling alone and rejected by their spouse. If you feel taken for granted, there's a way to change that now.
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What do you do when a marriage turns bad? Should you end it, or try to save it? The only person that can accurately answer that is you and only you. Regardless of how bad your marriage situation looks it can still be resolved. It is just going to take some time and effort to make your marriage work.
Make time to sit down with your spouse and voice you opinions, complaints, and concerns. More importantly than voicing your feelings is listening to what your partner has to say. After this sit down you should be able to determine if your spouse wants to continue in this relationship or leave. If your spouse doesn't want to leave and you know that staying together is what you want also, then it's safe to say you should try to save your marriage.
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Don't give up on your marriage simply because it's bad, because ending your marriage will affect more than the relationship you have with your spouse. Ending a marriage will affect the relationship with your family, friends, and your children negatively.
If you have tried and put your best foot forward to save your marriage then you can't feel guilty about ending it. However, if you haven't even made an attempt to rescue your marriage then you really shouldn't have gotten married in the first place.
It's no way around it, your marriage will have problems. How you deal with these problems will determine how bad your marriage suffers due to these problems. Take the time to evaluate the problems in your marriage, and then decide how to resolve them.
Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.
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What men want is a woman who knows how to inspire us. Inspiration is what causes motivation and motivation is what encourages people to achieve things that they didn't think they were possible of doing before. There are many women who can tell a man to do something, but women who can inspire their man to do something? That's rare. Remember, like I mentioned in a previous "What Men Want," us guys want to chase you, but we can't chase you if you aren't running. We want you to run and chase a goal, a dream, whatever. If we see that you're putting you're everything into it, just try and stop us chasing you. Here's 3 simple ways to inspire your man.
1. Keep doing what you did before marriage
There's a good chance that your man met you because he saw you in your element doing something that you absolutely love. It's when you're at your most vulnerable, and when you're at your strongest as well.
Maybe you sang or performed in some other way. Maybe you were passionate in a speech you gave. Here's a general tip: men who admire their women before marrying them are more likely to stay together with them in the long run.
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2. Prove us wrong
Us guys love a good argument. If we argue with you, it's only because we want you to respond. We don't want you to get angry; we just want to see the fighter in you. As I mentioned earlier, a lot of the time when you get up and do something, we'll follow suit.
Women achieving something that women don't achieve is a great selling point for women. On the surface, it just seems like something we can brag to our mates about, but in reality, we're proud that you're our wife. It shows that you've got strong character.
3. Hold the fort
Sometimes, us guys feel a little bit down and out. Whether it be because we get slack from work, or maybe because we are just plain tired, we have to retreat from the front line and rest and recuperate for a while.
If the woman could basically act as "the man of the house" for a while, just try and stop us from loving you. We want a woman who's feminine, but to have a woman who's strong as well shows us that we made a good choice in a wife.
Can you do these three things? If you can, your man will appreciate, respect and love you all the more for it.
Now Listen Carefully-
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Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.
Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com
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