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Articles from Margaret Paul | Selfgrowth.com
- ***Stop Escalating Conflict! - by Submitted on Aug 31, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you get into fights that turn ugly as the conflict escalates? Discover how to stop doing this. ________________________________________ A participant in one of my webinars asked: "Is there any way to resolve conflict if you have two 'escalating' ...
Views: 1917(1 vote) - ***The Power of Knowing What You Want - by Submitted on May 30, 2014 from Margaret PaulDiscover the great power in knowing what you want and not giving up. "What this power is, I cannot say. All I know is that it exists…and it becomes available only when you are in the state of mind in which you know exactly what you want…and are fully determined not to quit until ...
Views: 1877(1 vote) - ***Is There Such A Thing As Healthy Narcissism? - by Submitted on May 03, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Discover that 'healthy narcissism' is an oxymoron! ________________________________________ All of us have an ego wounded self who is narcissistic to one degree or another. For the purpose of this article, I am defining narcissism as abandoning ...
Views: 1841 - ***Are You Abandoning Yourself? - by Submitted on Aug 24, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you believe that feelings of abandonment are coming from others abandoning you - or do they come from self-abandonment? ________________________________________ When we think about abandonment, we generally think about being left by someone. But ...
Views: 1807 - ***Does Your Morning Routine Support Your Creativity? - by Submitted on May 25, 2012 from Margaret PaulHave you decided that you are not creative? Do you feel a deadness regarding creativity? “Everything about the way we start our day runs counter to the best conditions for thinking creatively,” wrote Annie Murphy Paul in an article entitled “Why Morning Routines Are Creativity Killers.” ...
Views: 1797 - ***"My Wife Won't Have Sex With Me " - by Submitted on Aug 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulIs sex mostly gone out of your relationship? There are always good reasons for this. Do you identify with Lawrence, whose wife won't have sex with him? In my work with individuals and couples, I often hear this complaint. Lawrence asks: "Would you please address how one deals ...
Views: 1783 - *** “I Don’t Fit In.” - by Submitted on Jul 20, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you believe that you are supposed to 'fit in?' You might feel differently after reading this article! ________________________________________ The other morning, I opened our carton of eggs to make my breakfast. I looked at the beautiful eggs we ...
Views: 1727(1 vote) - ***Is There Such A Thing As Healthy Caretaking? - by Submitted on Aug 03, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ A client of mine asked, "Is there such a thing as healthy caretaking?" Here is the answer! ________________________________________ I was trained by my mother and grandmother to be a caretaker. The messages were: "Your feelings are not important to ...
Views: 1724 - *** "I Keep Choosing The Wrong Partner" - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Discover the way out of choosing the wrong relationships over and over. ________________________________________ Do you find yourself choosing a similar wrong partner over and over? This is what Laura asks about: "How can I get past the point of ...
Views: 1705(2 votes) - ***Do You See The Obstacle Or The Goal? - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Where does your mind generally go - to the obstacles or to the goal? You CAN change your mindset if it is stopping you from having what you want. ________________________________________ Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your ...
Views: 1705 - ***Does Niceness Get A Closed Person Open? - by Submitted on Aug 03, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Were you taught that if you were nice others would be nice? ________________________________________ "I had this really terrible interaction on the phone with a customer on Tuesday," Carlton told me in our Skype session. "This guy was so closed and ...
Views: 1614(1 vote) - ***Addiction to Getting Others To Change - by Submitted on May 03, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you focusing on getting your partner to change to avoid a painful choice that you might need to make? ________________________________________ If you find yourself often focused on healing others or hoping you can get others to change, it is ...
Views: 1582(1 vote) - ***Are You The Person Your Dog Thinks You Are? - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2014 from Margaret PaulYour pet knows the truth of who you are! Many of us know how unconditionally loving most dogs naturally are – unless they have been abused. Even if you don't have a dog, you've likely seen the joy they express when their person comes home after being gone for even a few minutes. If ...
Views: 1580(1 vote) - ***"When Someone's Behavior Affects Me, What Can I Do?" - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2015 from Margaret PaulWhen someone's behavior is affecting you, what can you do, other than blame them? We Are Not Separate Some authors suggest that, when we are healthy enough, we will not be affected by others' unloving verbal behavior. We will rise above it and not take their words personally – that "Sticks ...
Views: 1572 - ***Addiction To Getting Things Done - by Submitted on Feb 22, 2013 from Margaret PaulDiscover when getting things done is healthy, and when it is unhealthy and obsessive. There are many addictive ways that most of us have learned to avoid our painful feelings, and focusing on getting things done is often one of these ways. It's not that there is anything wrong with ...
Views: 1562 - ***Can You Love Others? - by Submitted on May 17, 2012 from Margaret PaulWhat is loving to yourself and others is not always clear. This article presents some important questions to consider. "Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you." Wayne Dyer, Author ...
Views: 1548 - ***Are You Loving Yourself Or Avoiding Conflict? - by Submitted on Aug 26, 2015 from Margaret Paul-------------------------------------------------------------- How honest are you willing to be with yourself regarding your intent? -------------------------------------------------------------- Sometimes, when there is conflict in a relationship, it's hard to tell if you are withdrawing ...
Views: 1540(1 vote) - ***Living Alone Can Kill You - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Loneliness is a huge problem in our society. It doesn't have to be this way. ________________________________________ A study "followed nearly 45,000 people ages 45 and up who had heart disease or a high risk of developing the condition. Those who ...
Views: 1539(1 vote) - ***The Terror that Triggers Protective Behaviors - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you know what triggers you and why? ________________________________________ Have you ever found yourself suddenly feeling angry or scared or shut down when a moment ago you were feeling fine? People or situations can trigger us into rage, ...
Views: 1530 - ***Healing Celebration Anxiety - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are the holidays a joy for you or do you dread them? Are you ready to heal your celebration anxiety? ________________________________________ What were celebrations like in your home? Were they fun, connected family times that you looked forward to, ...
Views: 1518 - ***Getting Out of The Negative Relationship Cycle - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulShould you leave a relationship that is stuck in a negative cycle? It is quite common for me to work with clients who are stuck in a dysfunctional relationship cycle. Sarah describes a common cycle that she wants to resolve: "I am stuck in a two year uncommitted ...
Views: 1505 - ***Why Many Women Don't Think About Sex - by Submitted on Oct 05, 2012 from Margaret PaulAre you a woman who rarely or never thinks about sex? Have you believed that was something wrong with you? ________________________________________ Laverne wrote the following to me: "I have never had thoughts that picture me making love with my husband - or anyone else for that matter. I ...
Views: 1475 - ***Healing Love Addiction Within a Relationship - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2013 from Margaret PaulRelationships can provide a wonderful arena for healing love addiction. Many relationships flounder due to the issue of love addiction. Since people come together at their common level of woundedness – i.e., their common level of self-abandonment – if one partner is love ...
Views: 1467 - ***Getting Your Point Across - by Submitted on May 27, 2015 from Margaret PaulWhat happens in your relationships when you try to get your point across to someone who isn't open to your point of view? ________________________________________ One of the situations that often creates relationship conflict is when you become devoted to getting your point across. Most ...
Views: 1464 - ***The Power of Appreciating Yourself - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you often feel unappreciated? ________________________________________ "I'm a very nice person. I'm a good guy and I do nice things for people, but they never seem to appreciate me, and I feel angry about that," said Martin in one of our first ...
Views: 1463 - ***"Divorced and Reconciled – But It's Not Working" - by Submitted on Aug 09, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ After reconciling with your partner, do you find yourself back in the same pattern? ________________________________________ Nancy wrote to me asking the following question: "My husband and I were married for 15 years. Divorced. Reconciled after 9 ...
Views: 1459 - ***What Does It Mean To Be Love Addicted? - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ How do you know if you are love addicted? Discover the answer in this article. ________________________________________ Our culture seems to promote love addiction to such an extent that it seems like a healthy way to relate. While it is very common, ...
Views: 1458 - ***Learn To Love Yourself: Listen To Your Soul NOT Your Mind - by Submitted on Feb 08, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. February 08, 2016 _____________________________________________________________ Learning to discern the difference between mind and soul communication is essential to learning to love yourself. Learn how to tell when information is truth from Spirit or made up from the ...
Views: 1455 - ***Addicted to Porn? - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you addicted to porn and not feeling good about it? Discover the likely underlying cause and what to do about it. ________________________________________ I received the following question when I was conducting a webinar on sexual ...
Views: 1452(1 vote) - ***What Does It Mean To Love Yourself? - by Submitted on May 24, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Many of us know that we need to be loving to ourselves, but what does this actually mean? ________________________________________ Since most of us had little or no role modeling regarding loving ourselves when we were growing up, it's often ...
Views: 1449(1 vote) - ***"I Lose Myself Around Others" - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2013 from Margaret PaulHave you wondered why you are often able to take loving care of yourself when you are alone but you lose yourself in relationships? Discover the answer now! Do you find that you take loving care of yourself when you are alone, but that you lose yourself with someone you are ...
Views: 1438 - ***"Why Can't I Forgive Myself For My Mistakes? - by Submitted on Aug 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulDo you judge yourself for the past? Discover why and what to do about it. Brianna wrote to me, asking: "I am having a difficult time forgiving myself of past mistakes and it feels like it haunts me every morning and I get bogged down in swirling thoughts which only holds me ...
Views: 1428(1 vote) - ***"Can We Be Friends After A Relationship Ends?” - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2013 from Margaret PaulDiscover what you may need to address before deciding whether you can be friends with an ex partner. Elise writes: "My partner and I separated a year ago. My partner now wants to finalize the relationship but work on being 'friends'. I am having difficulty connecting as just ...
Views: 1425 - ***Anger And Other Forms of Control - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2015 from Margaret PaulIf you grew up in a family where one or both parents used anger to control you, then anger likely plays a role in your life now. Did you grow up with anger in your household? Did one or both of your parents use anger as a way to keep you in line and have control over you? How did you ...
Views: 1423 - ***"Why Didn't God Stop The Abuse?" - by Submitted on Nov 27, 2013 from Margaret PaulHave you ever wondered why God allows so much abuse, so much pain, so much war? "God has no hands but these." - Mother Theresa I am often asked by my clients, "If God is all powerful, why didn't he stop my father (or mother, or brother, or babysitter, or uncle ...
Views: 1422 - ***Self-love or Narcissism? - by Submitted on Oct 06, 2015 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Discover that self-love and narcissism are actually opposites! ________________________________________ It's interesting to me how often people confuse self-love with narcissism – because they are actually opposites in many ways. Ramona ask a ...
Views: 1418 - ***How to Talk about Sex - by Submitted on Dec 20, 2012 from Margaret PaulAre you stuck in your relationship not being able to talk about sex, or getting into power struggles about sex? Sean wrote in the following question on one of my free webinars about sexuality: "My wife and I have been married now for eighteen years and for the most part are ...
Views: 1416 - ***The Difference between Daydreaming and Imagining - by Submitted on Feb 22, 2013 from Margaret PaulOur imagination is a great gift - a connection with our Divine Source - when we use it from an inwardly connected loving Adult to create the life we want. "Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions." - Albert Einstein We are often ...
Views: 1411(1 vote) - ***Do You Have The Courage to Be a Loving Parent? - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you have the courage to risk loving yourself – even when you might encounter your children's uncaring behavior? Most of us really don't like it when someone is angry with us. We don't like it when someone goes into resistance to helping us when we need help, instead of caring about us. We ...
Views: 1404(1 vote) - *** Letting Go Of A Sugar Addiction - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2013 from Margaret PaulHave you tried unsuccessfully to heal a sugar addiction? Here's how! Are you sugar addicted? You are not alone! I used to be intensely sugar addicted. I craved it all the time, and it seems like the more I ate, the more I wanted it. The fact that it made me feel terrible – first ...
Views: 1403 - ***Change Your Life With This Simple Act - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2013 from Margaret PaulDo you understand the power of kindness to change your life? "Extend to each person, no matter how trivial the contact, all the care and kindness and understanding and love that you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same ...
Views: 1394 - ***Controlling Behavior: Are Your Eyes On Your Partner's Plate? - by Submitted on Mar 15, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 14, 2016 _____________________________________________________________________________________ It is often tempting to tell others what to do, especially when it is obvious that they are not taking care of themselves. Discover why this usually backfires and what ...
Views: 1394 - ***The Art of Conversation - by Submitted on Feb 08, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you have mostly one-way or two-way conversations? What kind of conversationalist are you? ________________________________________ What happens in your conversations with people? The kind of conversation you have with someone says a lot about both ...
Views: 1386 - ***Where Did The Passion Go? - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2013 from Margaret PaulDo you love your partner but find that the intensity and intimacy have become muted? Discover why. Patti asked the following question in one of my webinars on sexuality: I am now going out with the man of my dreams. I have wanted to be in relationship with him for so long. We used ...
Views: 1385 - ***The Art of Setting Boundaries - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2013 from Margaret PaulDiscover what a boundary is and what it isn't. Merilee wrote the following question to me in one of my relationship webinars: "Hi Dr. Paul -- One of my biggest struggles is being open to giving and receiving love, but also setting boundaries. I want to be loving, not ...
Views: 1384 - ***Overweight and Miserable - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you tired of being overweight and food addicted? There is a way to heal. ________________________________________ Pamela writes this question for my webinar on food addiction: "I am a 22-yr old female weighing 220 lbs with a height of 5.9". I ...
Views: 1383 - ***Healing From Infidelity - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2013 from Margaret PaulInfidelity is a huge challenge, but relationships can heal from this and actually become stronger. Sheldon wrote this question to me during one of my free webinars: "I am trying to repair my 20-year marriage after my infidelity. I was discovered by my wife two years ago. I ...
Views: 1382 - ***How Relationships Can Be Easy – 4 Keys to Loving Relationships - by Submitted on Oct 13, 2015 from Margaret Paul_______________________________________________________ Creating a loving relationship doesn't have to be as hard as you might think! _______________________________________________________ As most of us know, relationships can be very challenging. We generally enter a relationship with ...
Views: 1377(1 vote) - ***"My Wife Is No Longer In Love With Me" - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2014 from Margaret PaulAre you willing to do the inner work you need to do to possibly save your relationship? Many people, like Aaron who asked the following question, seek my help because either their partner is no longer in love with them, or they are no longer in love with their partner. Aaron ...
Views: 1375(1 vote) - ***"I Don't Know How To Give Her What She Wants From Me." - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you sometimes feel like you try to give your partner the connection he or she wants and can't figure out how? ________________________________________ I was having a Skype session with Andrea and Lawrence. Married for 18 years with two teen-age ...
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