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Articles from Margaret Paul | Selfgrowth.com
- ***How to Attract a Healthy Relationship - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2015 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you keep attracting narcissistic or emotionally unavailable partners? You CAN learn to attract a healthy partner! ________________________________________ Have you found yourself continually attracting the same kind of unhealthy person into your ...
Views: 1268 - ***Loving Yourself As An Introvert in Groups - by Submitted on Nov 29, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, PhD November 28, 2016 Do you often feel out of place and like an alien in some groups? Discover how to love yourself in group situations. "She's very shy," my parents used to say to people when I was quiet. From their tone, I thought it wasn't a good thing to be shy. I ...
Views: 1267 - ***Do You Put Pressure on Yourself? - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2014 from Margaret Paul______________________________________ Pressuring yourself might be causing resistance, stress, anxiety, physical pain, insomnia and even illness. ________________________________________ How many of you put a lot of pressure on yourself? How often do you feel anxious because of this ...
Views: 1260 - ***The Aftermath of a Relationship with a Narcissist - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul Ph.D. February 22, 2016 Have you been in love with a narcissist? Are you now going through pain and confusion as a result of the relationship ending? Have you been in a relationship with a narcissist? Many people are very vulnerable to getting into a relationship with a ...
Views: 1258 - ***Are You Confused About Boundaries in Relationships? - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2014 from Margaret PaulMany people confuse boundaries - which are a way of taking loving care of yourself – with controlling behavior toward others. Marilee told me in one of our early phone sessions: "I set a boundary. I told him that he couldn't speak to me that way any more." Jackson said to ...
Views: 1257 - ***How Do I Stop Sabotaging Myself? - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulDiscover why you may be sabotaging and punishing yourself with your self-judgment and self-rejection. Would you love to manifest your dreams and have the life you want? Most people would unhesitatingly respond with a resounding "YES!" Yet, do you sometimes find yourself ...
Views: 1257 - ***Learning to Love Your Sacred Being - by Submitted on May 01, 2015 from Margaret PaulDo you know who you are in your essence? If you knew that your core Self, your essence, was a sacred being, an individualized expression of Spirit, would you treat yourself differently than you currently do? There is a wonderful story about a king who went into a downtrodden village, a ...
Views: 1255 - ***When You Are Being Nice, Are You Loving Or Controlling? - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 21, 2016 ________________________________________ There can be a big difference in intent between being nice and being loving. Being nice might be manipulative, while being loving means being authentic. ________________________________________ Our ...
Views: 1255 - Loving Yourself When Your Partner Shuts You Out - by Submitted on Mar 21, 2017 from Margaret PaulWhat do you do when your partner shuts you out? Do you know that being shut out and stonewalled is even more hurtful than being yelled at? Children would rather get yelled at or even hit than ignored. This is why the worst punishment for prisoners is solitary confinement. Yet, along with ...
Views: 1255 - ***The Foundation for Abundance - by Submitted on Mar 29, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you aware of the vast difference between expressing gratitude from your ego wounded self or from your loving adult self? ________________________________________ "Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all ...
Views: 1252 - *** Avoiding Emotional Pain Causes Emotional Pain - by Submitted on May 30, 2016 from Margaret PaulWe all learned many ways of avoiding pain as we were growing up, but what once seemed to protect us against pain is now actually causing our pain. We all had to learn many ways of avoiding emotional pain as we were growing up, because we could not have survived the pain of childhood ...
Views: 1250 - ***Healing a 'Fix Others' Addiction - by Submitted on Jul 07, 2015 from Margaret PaulAre you addicted to fixing others? Do you believe this is loving rather than controlling? Many of us were raised to base our identity on helping or fixing others. Fixing others is often the addiction of choice for people who have a naturally deep level of empathy and who easily feel ...
Views: 1249(2 votes) - ***"Why Do I Seem to Attract Rejection?" - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you perplexed regarding why you so often feel rejected by others? ________________________________________ Alana asked me the following question: "My whole life I have felt that I don't fit in with others - in my family, school, work - and ...
Views: 1248 - ***"How Do I Deal With My Critical Mother?" - by Submitted on May 17, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Dealing with critical people, especially a parent, is a challenge for all of us. Here are some options for dealing with a critical mother. ________________________________________ Having a critical mother is a big challenge. I know, because I grew up ...
Views: 1243 - ***The Way to Happiness - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulAre you ready to discover the way to happiness? Are you ready to discover what Epictetus knew over 2000 years ago? "There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will." ~Epictetus, AD 55-135 It's hard for ...
Views: 1243(1 vote) - ***Do You Know How To Love? - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Love is not something that can be described – it needs to be experienced, and when you experience it through loving yourself, you will know how to love. ________________________________________ We read many things about what love is and what it isn't ...
Views: 1240(1 vote) - ***What Prevents You From Loving Yourself? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Margaret PaulIn your daily life, are you guided by fear or by love? What are the fears that block being loving to yourself and others? How often is the question, "What is loving to myself and others - what is in my highest good and the highest good of another?" the question that guides your actions? Is ...
Views: 1237 - ***Why Do I Attach To An Unavailable Person?" - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2015 from Margaret PaulAre you addicted to trying to get love from unavailable, unloving people? Have you found yourself repeatedly 'falling in love' with an unavailable person? Have you wondered why you keep doing this? This is the question Wanda asked: "What about our wounded self causes us to attach so ...
Views: 1230(1 vote) - ***Loving Yourself When Being Blamed - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2017 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, PhD February 20, 2017 Discover how loving it is to yourself to understand the amazing difference between blame and responsibility. Growing up, most of us had numerous experiences of being blamed. I was frequently blamed for things that I was too young to understand, ...
Views: 1221 - ***Are You Addicted to the Internet? - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you get addictively stuck on the Internet and can't seem to find your way out? ________________________________________ Our society provides many ways we can avoid our feelings addictively. Many people today are addicted to being on the Internet ...
Views: 1218 - ***From Atheist To The Joy of Divine Grace - by Submitted on Feb 15, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. February 15, 2016 _______________________________________________________________________________ The state of Divine Grace is a most wonderful experience, and it's available to all of us – even if you are an atheist. ...
Views: 1217 - ***I Fall Too Hard In Love - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you find yourself getting hurt over and over in relationships? Discover why. ________________________________________ Do you find yourself falling hard for someone and then ending up feeling rejected and not good enough when it ends? This is the ...
Views: 1214 - ***Staying Centered in Conflict - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you conflict-avoidant? Does conflict terrify you? Discover how to heal this. ________________________________________ Angela writes: "I avoid conflict as much as possible because I cannot handle the anxiety it produces in me, as if I am going ...
Views: 1212 - ***"How Can I Manage Overwhelm?" - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you often feel overwhelmed with demands, tasks and life in general? ________________________________________ Most of us lead very busy lives and it is easy to become overwhelmed with all we need to do. In addition, about 15% to 20% of us are born ...
Views: 1209 - ***Resisting Happiness - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2015 from Margaret PaulAre you stuck in misery? Do you resist taking responsibility for making yourself happy? Discover a possible cause of this. One of the issues I frequently encounter with my clients is the following: Sasha is in a long-term, on-again, off-again, relationship with Fabio. When Sasha is taking ...
Views: 1208(1 vote) - Help! I don’t Want To Be Like My Family! - by Submitted on Jan 30, 2018 from Margaret PaulAlexia asked: “My mother and my grandmother and most of the people I learned life from, never loved themselves. I know I don't want to be like them but the reality is I am! I have changed but not as much as I want. Can you please teach me how to fix this suffering from my wounded self?” I ...
Views: 1206 - ***Can You Emotionally Connect With Your Family Of Origin? - by Submitted on Nov 02, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, PhD October 31, 2016 Do you have major challenges in emotionally connecting with your family of origin? You are not alone! Are you happy with your family of origin? Can you emotionally connect with your family? If you can, you are fortunate indeed. Many people feel ...
Views: 1204(1 vote) - ***Single? What Are Your False Beliefs About Relationships? - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ If you are single, do you relate to any of these false beliefs about being in a relationship? ________________________________________ I have discovered that many of the single people I work with have a number of false beliefs about relationships. If ...
Views: 1202 - ***Are You Playing Too Small? - by Submitted on May 16, 2014 from Margaret PaulAre you limiting your life – allowing fear to stop you from doing what brings you joy? "There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." ~Nelson Mandela Do you feel passionate about your ...
Views: 1197 - ***Are You a Real Friend? - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you have good friends? Are you a good friend – both with yourself and with others? ________________________________________ "A real friend is one who helps us to think our noblest thoughts, put forth our best efforts, and be our best selves." ...
Views: 1196 - ***What Are You Waiting For? - by Submitted on Jan 24, 2014 from Margaret PaulIs there something you've always wanted to do but have never done? What’s stopping you? “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” –Chinese Proverb How often do you say to yourself, "I wish I had…..?" ...
Views: 1192 - ***Shyness - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you shy? Is your shyness getting in the way of your connection with others? ________________________________________ Have you struggled with being a shy person? Lily asks: "I try hard to overcome my shyness and reluctance to stand out, speak ...
Views: 1189 - ***How To Forgive - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. June 06, 2016 Do you want to forgive yourself or someone else, but you just can't seem to get there? Learn how to forgive in this article. _____________________________________________________________________________ It's one of the greatest gifts you can ...
Views: 1187 - ***Trusting Others Starts With Self-Trust - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2015 from Margaret Paul_______________________________________________________ We want to be able to trust others to be honest and reliable. Yet are you honest and reliable with yourself? Do you trust your own inner knowing? You will not be able to trust others until you are trustworthy with ...
Views: 1187 - ***"I Lose My Cool In Relationships." - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you find that as soon as you really like someone – whether as a friend or as a partner – you 'lose your cool?' ________________________________________ Relationships offer us more opportunities for personal growth than just about anything else in ...
Views: 1186 - ***How Can I Get My Partner To Change? - by Submitted on Jun 25, 2015 from Margaret PaulDiscover the things you might need to change in yourself in order to have a chance at creating change in your partner and in your relationship. ________________________________________ How much energy do you spend trying to get what you want from your partner? Think about it for a moment - ...
Views: 1186 - ***"How Can I Get Him To Stop Hurting Me?" - by Submitted on May 24, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you aware of the system you have created with your partner that may be causing you pain? ________________________________________ I have worked with couples for 44 years, and one thing I can tell you for sure: relationships are a system, and each ...
Views: 1183 - ***Finding The Partner Of My Dreams - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you seeking the formula for attracting the partner of your dreams? Here it is! ________________________________________ Rochelle asks: "If I assess myself quite objectively, if I know my accomplishments as well as my drawbacks, is there a ...
Views: 1183 - ***How To Trust Again - by Submitted on Aug 29, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. August 29, 2016 Learning how to trust again is a process, not an event, and it take both inner and relationship work. I received the following question about how to trust again: "My husband and I remarried after we both got divorced and went through a number of ...
Views: 1182(1 vote) - ***The High Cost of Physical Self-Abandonment - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2016 from Margaret PaulIf you are not concerned with your physical self-care, have you ever considered the high cost to those around you? I was sitting in the airport at my gate in Chicago, on my way home from the East Coast, having just completed a wonderful Inner Bonding weekend workshop at Kripalu in Lenox, MA. ...
Views: 1182 - ***Managing Challenging Families - by Submitted on May 11, 2016 from Margaret PaulSometimes the most loving act, both for yourself and for others, is to disengage from an abusive family relationship. This can eventually lead to some healing. We all know that families can be very challenging! Angie grew up in a family where she was the caretaker. The oldest of four, ...
Views: 1179 - ***You Want A Relationship, But Are You Emotionally Unavailable? - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 28, 2016 ________________________________________ Do you keep attracting emotionally unavailable people or are you stuck in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable person? ________________________________________ Do you believe that you are fully ...
Views: 1178 - ***Do You Define Your Adequacy By Looks and/or Performance? - by Submitted on May 24, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ What was valued and approved of in your family as you were growing up? ________________________________________ When you were growing up, how did you learn to define your worth? Here are some of the things my clients have said to me: • In my ...
Views: 1175 - *** Loving Yourself Through Heartbreak and Grief - by Submitted on Dec 05, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, PhD December 05, 2016 ________________________________________ Learn how to love yourself through heartbreak and grief, rather than continue to abandon yourself in ways that are hurting you. ________________________________________ Take a moment right now to ...
Views: 1173 - *** Succeeding Through Failure - by Submitted on Nov 22, 2013 from Margaret Paul"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. --Michael Jordan, Former Professional Basketball Player and ...
Views: 1172 - ***Is Unconditional Love Realistic? - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you have the expectation that you will receive unconditional love from a partner? Most of us would love the experience of being loved unconditionally by someone. This is the experience we needed when we were growing up, but most parents are not connected enough with themselves and ...
Views: 1168 - *** If You Learn To Love Yourself, Will You End Up Alone? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. October 03, 2016 If you learn to love yourself and you become happy and whole, will you end up alone? Will a partner want you if you are not needy? I had been working with Kathleen for a few months when we had the following discussion: KATHLEEN: I know that the ...
Views: 1166 - Whose Feelings Are You Responsible For - Yours or Others? - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2018 from Margaret PaulDo you believe you are responsible for causing others' anger, hurt, sadness or anxiety? Is this causing you to feel guilty? "My wife is so upset that I have to travel more on my new job," Chuck told me in our phone counseling session. "She feels so alone and lost when I'm gone. When I talk ...
Views: 1166 - ***Kind at the Beginning…Critical Later. Why? - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2016 from Margaret PaulMargaret Paul, Ph.D. January 11, 2016 ________________________________________ Have you been mystified when someone who has appeared to be very kind and caring suddenly becomes blaming, critical, or just disappears? ________________________________________ How often have you had ...
Views: 1163 - A Major Cause of Emotional Suffering - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2018 from Margaret PaulIs there one thing that is the primary cause of emotional suffering? Yes! Discover the one choice that underlies your emotional suffering. Is it possible that there is one major cause of emotional pain and suffering? Yes! The major cause of suffering is UNKINDNESS - to yourself and to ...
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