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Articles from Margaret Paul | Selfgrowth.com
- ***The Myth of Explaining and Defending - by Submitted on May 12, 2011 from Margaret Paul"What's the matter with you?" "How could you do that?""Explain yourself, young lady/young man.""Why are you dressed like that?""Why are you late again?""What did you do to your hair!"How often did you hear some variation of this when ...
Views: 2890 - ***The Need for Touch - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Margaret PaulWe are born with the need to touch and be touched, skin-to-skin. If you were not held and touched with love as you were growing up, then this might be a very deep need for you. But even if you were held and touched with love, you still need it today. It is a basic need.But not all touch meets ...
Views: 2399 - ***The Power of Appreciating Yourself - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you often feel unappreciated? ________________________________________ "I'm a very nice person. I'm a good guy and I do nice things for people, but they never seem to appreciate me, and I feel angry about that," said Martin in one of our first ...
Views: 1581 - ***The Terror that Triggers Protective Behaviors - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you know what triggers you and why? ________________________________________ Have you ever found yourself suddenly feeling angry or scared or shut down when a moment ago you were feeling fine? People or situations can trigger us into rage, ...
Views: 1618 - ***The Wanting Mind, Part 1 - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2008 from Margaret Paul"This force [that keeps us always wanting] is known in several Buddhist traditions as the Wanting Mind. The Wanting Mind is always craving an experience different from the one it currently has." --Brent Kessel, It's Not About the Money There is nothing wrong with wanting - wanting more time, ...
Views: 3474 - ***Trusting Others Starts With Self-Trust - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2015 from Margaret Paul_______________________________________________________ We want to be able to trust others to be honest and reliable. Yet are you honest and reliable with yourself? Do you trust your own inner knowing? You will not be able to trust others until you are trustworthy with ...
Views: 1280 - ***What Are You Waiting For? - by Submitted on Jan 24, 2014 from Margaret PaulIs there something you've always wanted to do but have never done? What’s stopping you? “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” –Chinese Proverb How often do you say to yourself, "I wish I had…..?" ...
Views: 1238 - ***What Does It Mean To Be Love Addicted? - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ How do you know if you are love addicted? Discover the answer in this article. ________________________________________ Our culture seems to promote love addiction to such an extent that it seems like a healthy way to relate. While it is very common, ...
Views: 1552 - ***What if You Knew That You Are Never Alone - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2014 from Margaret PaulYour spiritual guidance is always here for you, but you need to know how to access it. Connecting with Spirit is simple, but not always easy. ________________________________________ What if you knew that you are never alone - that you are always being guided by a personal source of ...
Views: 1075 - ***What Prevents You From Loving Yourself? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Margaret PaulIn your daily life, are you guided by fear or by love? What are the fears that block being loving to yourself and others? How often is the question, "What is loving to myself and others - what is in my highest good and the highest good of another?" the question that guides your actions? Is ...
Views: 1327 - ***When Not To Start A Relationship - by Submitted on Jan 28, 2008 from Margaret PaulHave you recently ended a relationship or are you recently divorced? Are you thinking about dating again? Many times, putting yourself back into the dating scene is a good idea. But how can you know when it is time to start a new relationship? Here are some questions to ponder: 1. Are you ...
Views: 2778 - ***When To Compromise…And When Not To Compromise - by Submitted on Dec 19, 2014 from Margaret PaulDiscover when compromise is healthy and when it's self-abandoning. Compromise! What does this word conjure up for you? Is it is a positive or negative word for you? Does it bring up a sense of loving resolution, or a sense of losing yourself and losing your integrity? When you think about ...
Views: 1015 - ***When You Are Being Nice, Are You Loving Or Controlling? - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 21, 2016 ________________________________________ There can be a big difference in intent between being nice and being loving. Being nice might be manipulative, while being loving means being authentic. ________________________________________ Our ...
Views: 1346 - ***When You Love Yourself, You Love Others - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2015 from Margaret PaulAre you being selfish if you do what brings you joy, even if others don't like it? Do you feel trapped, believing you can't really take loving care of yourself without being unloving to others? One of the questions I often hear from my clients is, "If I take care of myself and do what brings ...
Views: 1483 - ***Where Did The Passion Go? - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2013 from Margaret PaulDo you love your partner but find that the intensity and intimacy have become muted? Discover why. Patti asked the following question in one of my webinars on sexuality: I am now going out with the man of my dreams. I have wanted to be in relationship with him for so long. We used ...
Views: 1475 - ***Where Kindness Comes From - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you allow your natural kindness to shine forth? "Kindness is an inner desire that makes us want to do good things even if we do not get anything in return. It is the joy of our life to do them. When we do good things from this inner desire, there is kindness in everything we ...
Views: 1200 - ***Who Are You Attracting to Yourself? - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2014 from Margaret PaulAre you happy with who you are attracting into your life? "Everybody is like a magnet. You attract to yourself reflections of that which you are." Dr. David Hawkins, Psychiatrist, Physician and Researcher, author of Power vs. Force Are you happy with who you ...
Views: 1073 - ***Who Is In Charge of Your Decision Making Process? - by Submitted on Sep 19, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. September 19, 2016 Which part of you – your ego wounded self or your loving adult – is in charge of your decision making process? Which part of you makes your day-to-day decisions, as well as your major decisions - your wounded self or your loving adult? Which ...
Views: 1058 - ***Why Can't I Commit? - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you have problems committing to a relationship, or are you involved with someone who has a fear of commitment? Louis wrote to me: "I have been dating an amazing girl, but recently ended it because I am not sure if she is good for me. Our relationship has ...
Views: 1195 - ***Why Do We Seek Approval? - by Submitted on Sep 08, 2011 from Margaret PaulMany years ago, I became aware of feeling anxious much of the time. Since this feeling had been with me as long as I could remember, it had seemed normal - until it stopped being okay with me. It stopped being okay when I went back to school to become a psychotherapist. I realized then that, ...
Views: 2813 - ***Why Have Animals In Your Life - by Submitted on May 15, 2015 from Margaret PaulDiscover the many good reasons for having animals in your life. “Until a person has loved an animal a part of the soul remains unawakened." ~Anatole France People who love animals know that there are many very good reasons to have animals in your life. Love and Presence Animals who ...
Views: 1389 - ***Why Loving Yourself Creates Sexual Passion With Your Partner - by Submitted on Feb 13, 2017 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, PhD February 13, 2017 Discover the great benefits to your relationship in learning to love yourself! What creates sexual passion? • First, there needs to be sexual chemistry between two people. Sexual chemistry can sustain passion for a while, but it isn't enough ...
Views: 1066 - ***Why Many Women Don't Think About Sex - by Submitted on Oct 05, 2012 from Margaret PaulAre you a woman who rarely or never thinks about sex? Have you believed that was something wrong with you? ________________________________________ Laverne wrote the following to me: "I have never had thoughts that picture me making love with my husband - or anyone else for that matter. I ...
Views: 1544 - ***Why Racism? - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2014 from Margaret PaulDiscover some of the underlying causes of racism and what is necessary to heal this scourge of our society. I do not pretend to be an expert on what causes a person to be a racist, but I would like to explore some ideas based on the principles of Inner Bonding. Those of you who have worked ...
Views: 1057 - ***Why We Take Things Personally - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2016 from Margaret PaulMargaret Paul, Ph.D. January 18, 2016 __________________________________________________________________ When others are mean or rejecting, do you tend to take their behavior personally? __________________________________________________________________ One of the biggest issues that ...
Views: 1410 - ***Will Your Next Marriage be Better? - by Submitted on Dec 07, 2011 from Margaret Paul“It’s time for me to move on. I’ve learned so much – I just know that next time it will be better.”“Our new relationship has a great chance, because we’ve both been married before and have learned a lot. We know that this time around we will do it so ...
Views: 2535 - ***You Want A Relationship, But Are You Emotionally Unavailable? - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 28, 2016 ________________________________________ Do you keep attracting emotionally unavailable people or are you stuck in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable person? ________________________________________ Do you believe that you are fully ...
Views: 1272 - *Diffusing Anger Or Feeding The Flames - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2008 from Margaret PaulHave you ever had an argument with someone - a partner, spouse, close friend, child, parent or other relative, or a business associate - that started small and spiraled into an intense conflict? Have you ever scratched your head, wondering how it got so out of control? Let's take a look at what ...
Views: 2871 - *Emotional Intimacy - by Submitted on Aug 07, 2008 from Margaret PaulExperiencing emotional intimacy with others is one of the most satisfying experiences of life. Emotional intimacy, or a sense of deep connection with another person or a group of people, occurs when each person is completely open hearted and devoted to taking 100% responsibility for their own ...
Views: 2636 - *Love And Marriage: Do They Really Go Together? - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2008 from Margaret PaulDo love and marriage really go together like a horse and carriage? For some they do but for many they don't. Why not? Why does love seem to die away in so many marriages? At the beginning of most relationships that eventually lead to marriage, the couple falls in love and believes that this ...
Views: 2675 - *Marriage Advice: Love And Fairness - by Submitted on May 18, 2008 from Margaret Paul"Love has nothing to do with fairness. Love is Love." --Susan Page, Why Talking is Not Enough "It's not fair!" How often have you heard this from young or adolescent siblings? I grew up as an only child, so I was never indoctrinated with the concept of fairness. Not growing up with it, I ...
Views: 2895 - *Relationship Advice: Be Willing To Have Your Partner Be Upset With You - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2008 from Margaret PaulAs a counselor, I often work with people who are unhappy in their relationship and thinking of leaving. They believe that they are unhappy because of their partner, but the real reason is that they are not taking responsibility for their own feelings within the relationship. For example, when ...
Views: 3375 - *Relationships: Letting Go Of Problem Solving - by Submitted on Sep 17, 2008 from Margaret Paul"We never seem to be able to solve any problems," Kaylee told me in a phone session. "Every time we sit down to solve a problem, we end up fighting. It doesn't really matter what it is about - it always ends up the same. Is this normal? Aren't couples supposed to be able to solve ...
Views: 2587 - *Relationships: The Power Of Good Will - by Submitted on Sep 04, 2008 from Margaret PaulResearch into good marriages indicates that the most important choice healthy couples make is to have good will toward each other. This may seems like a simple requirement, yet many couples have anything but good will toward each other. Instead, they make it far more important to: Attempt to ...
Views: 2890 - *Saving Your Marriage When You Have Children - by Submitted on Apr 06, 2008 from Margaret PaulResearch indicates that, unless there is violence in the home, children are better off being raised by an intact family. Whenever clients who have children call to work with me on their marriage, I always encourage them to do all they can to save their marriage. Leah is a good example of a ...
Views: 2751 - --- Love Yourself: 30-Day Inner Bonding Experience - by Submitted on Feb 17, 2018 from Margaret PaulThe next 'Love Yourself' Course starts February 21, 2018. Are you ready to learn how to love yourself? Love Yourself: A 30-Day Home-Study Inner Bonding Experience with Dr. Margaret Paul, to self-heal anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, addictions and relationships. "I feel like I have ...
Views: 949 - --- Love Yourself: 30-Day Inner Bonding Experience - by Submitted on Feb 17, 2018 from Margaret PaulThe next 'Love Yourself' Course starts February 21, 2018. Are you ready to learn how to love yourself? Love Yourself: A 30-Day Home-Study Inner Bonding Experience with Dr. Margaret Paul, to self-heal anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, addictions and relationships. "I feel like I have ...
Views: 1015 - ---Loving Yourself by Getting Organized - by Submitted on Feb 26, 2018 from Margaret Paul"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone." - Pablo Picasso Do you struggle with: -Procrastination -Clutter -Overwhelm -Disorganization -Being late -Guilt over not getting things done or not following through with commitments -Anxiety over things ...
Views: 957 - 5 Actions For Successful Relationships - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2006 from Margaret PaulCouples that have a very good relationship are not just lucky. Successful, loving relationships do not just happen. The couples that have loving relationships are taking specific actions that people in unsuccessful relationships are not taking. ACTION 1 - KINDNESS TO SELF AND OTHER Think for a ...
Views: 2402 - 5 Relationship Killers and How to Avoid Them - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2006 from Margaret PaulAs a relationship counselor, I am constantly being asked why so many relationships fail. In the 37 years that I have worked with couples, I have discovered five major relationship killers: CONTROLLING BEHAVIOR Most people enter a relationship with a deep fear of rejection, and this fear ...
Views: 2893 - A Major Cause of Emotional Suffering - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2018 from Margaret PaulIs there one thing that is the primary cause of emotional suffering? Yes! Discover the one choice that underlies your emotional suffering. Is it possible that there is one major cause of emotional pain and suffering? Yes! The major cause of suffering is UNKINDNESS - to yourself and to ...
Views: 1252 - Actions of Love - by Submitted on Jan 09, 2006 from Margaret PaulMyrna, 38 and a successful physician, sought my help because she often felt inadequate. While she really valued herself as a doctor, she did not value herself in her important relationships with friends and family. In addition, she said she wanted to be in a loving relationship but she took no ...
Views: 3351 - Addiction to Being "All Together" - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2009 from Margaret PaulI often have the experience of someone showing up at one of my 5-day Inner Bonding Intensives and presenting themselves as "all together", or "fine." "I'm not sure why I'm here," they state. "I really don't know what to work on. I've been through years of therapy and to a ton of workshops and ...
Views: 3332 - Addiction to Numbness - by Submitted on Sep 11, 2007 from Margaret PaulLinda sat opposite me at one of my five-day Inner Bonding Intensives. She had decided to attend the Intensive because her depression, which had plagued her for years, was not being helped by medication or by the numerous forms of therapy that she had tried. As she sat opposite me, telling me ...
Views: 2493 - Addiction to Perfection - by Submitted on May 03, 2005 from Margaret PaulThe following email was sent to me by Karen, a member of our website: “For no obvious reason this morning, I was feeling anxious and depressed. I looked at it and realized that the false belief creating all this was that I have to be perfect in order for me to allow myself to feel happiness. ...
Views: 2367 - Addiction to Self-Judgment - by Submitted on May 01, 2006 from Margaret Paul“I’m such a jerk. How could I have said that?” “I’m a looser. I’ll never get anywhere.” “I’m so stupid. I should have learned this by now.” “I don’t fit in. I don’t belong with these people.” “I’ll never be good enough. I’ll never do it right enough.” “I’m permanently emotionally damaged. I’ll ...
Views: 6815 - Anxiety: A Lack of Reality - by Submitted on Jun 05, 2007 from Margaret PaulBrent started to work with me after his wife, Carla, suddenly decided to leave the marriage. They had been married five years and Brent thought everything was fine. Then Brent became ill and Carla withdrew. And then she was gone. Brent was devastated. He loved Carla and wanted her back. ...
Views: 3274 - Are You an Optimist or a Pessimist? - by Submitted on Jan 19, 2009 from Margaret Paul"I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else." - Winston Churchill When you notice your thoughts, which kind of thoughts predominate? Do you find yourself often thinking pessimistic thoughts such as: I'll never get where I want to go. I'm a loser.I'm not smart enough to ...
Views: 6051 - Are You Stuck in Your Life? - by Submitted on Jan 23, 2007 from Margaret PaulAre you constantly reading self-help and motivational books yet nothing changes? Have you tried many different forms of therapy yet still feel unhappy, anxious, depressed and alone? Do you often have the answers for others but not for yourself? The problem may be that you are intent on ...
Views: 3256 - Attracting Your Beloved - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2019 from Margaret PaulA 30-Day At-Home Course The next course will start on April 3rd, 2019 https://innerbonding.com/video/mp4/Beloved-Landing-page.mp4 This course is offered twice a year. Are you ready to find the love of your life? Attracting your Beloved: A 30-Day Home-Study Experience With Dr. ...
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