Divorce Articles

Anger - it's a dirty word, isn't it? After all, if you've got too much, you may have to participate in "Anger Management." Being described as "angry" implies something deep, dark and heavy going on inside. When it's used to describe someone, it's NOT a compliment.

When To Leave A Marriage With Kids: Should You Stay Married For The Kids It isn't unusual to overhear conversations like this. One lady told another that she should NOT stay in her marriage for the sake of her children. She offered the usual: make yourself happy; why should you be punished to stay with that guy just because he fathered your children; over time the kids will be better off. She added more but these generally covered the subject. In those conversations, certain

Life after divorce can be a challenge. Wait...let me restate that...life can be a challenge. Divorce can make the challenges feel insurmountable. At least it did for me. I fell madly in love at 19 and spent the next 18 years building a life with my soul mate. We created a life that appeared, from the outside, to be everything a happy couple would want. The problem was that it turned out I didn't want it. Truthfully, I didn't know what it was that I wanted. I only knew that I

Is this the year you will attract your prince? Or instead, will you attract frogs? This can be the year that you meet “Mr. Right”. If you haven’t done so, NOW is the time to set the spiritual and energetic foundation for achieving your dream marriage. With every year that passes, the ...

I’m often asked: ‘When is a good time to start dating?’ One of the difficulties women face when they’re ready to start dating is where and how to start. Starting too soon or for the wrong reasons is not going to help re-build your self-confidence or help you become open to new intimate relationships. Let’s not overlook the fact that you may be the one who wanted the divorce because you were already in a relationship with someone else. I suggest you start by simply getting together with friends or work colleagues for fun, relaxation and enjoyment.

Getting psyched up to tell your children about your pending divorcen-- or separation? Not sure what to say? When to say it? How tonsay it? What to expect after the conversation? What to do next? How do deal with your special circumstances? What therapists,nmediators, atto eys, clergy and other ...

When it comes to making the best decision about which lawyer to hire for their divorce, many people rely on getting a referral from a friend of relative. Although this is a common way to choose a lawyer, it can lead to a mismatch in expectations between how the client thinks that their case will proceed and the way that the lawyer usually handles their divorce cases.

Children of Divorcer Easing their Pain - and Yours - with Openhearted Boundaries By Kelly Tobey What can we do to make divorce less devastating for children? In an ideal world, all children would be fully loved and supported by their blood parents who, in turn, would totally love and support each other. But back on planet earth, this ideal seems to be in short supply. Even though a parental breakup is clearly not ideal for the children involved, in some circumstances it w

If you and your spouse agree that you want to get divorced as easily and cheaply as possible, a Califo ia divorce kit could be just what you need to achieve your goal. As long as the two of you are willing to cooperate, you can work together to do your own divorce without lawyers and save a ton of money on legal fees. But you will need a comprehensive and up-to-date Califo ia divorce kit. Key Elements of a Good Califo ia Divorce Kit So what should you look for in a divorce kit? To work well for you, the kit should include the following elements:

Psssst, wanna know a little divorce secret? Your daily divorce drama is an illusion. Sure, to you, it can feel all too real, but the fact is we get stuck in the drama mud because we have never been been taugt how to break ourselves away from it. People love to tell you to hold your head up high, and to be like Teflon, but during divorce nobody bothers to dig deeper into why you feel like crap, and how you can use that reasoning for getting unstuck.

For many of us, the holidays can feel dark, lonely, and stressful—especially if we are going through or recovering from divorce. And instead of looking forward to the beautiful decorations, smell of baking pies, and holiday songs on the radio, we instead may feel triggered by sadness. Moving on from divorce and our lives does not mean that we cannot enjoy the holidays. In fact, we can even make them better than over before when we remember the following. Manage expectations, but remain optimistic.

-4 Words That Changed My Life…”I Want A Divorce”-nBy: Scott ThayernThe scoreboard reads the following… bottom of the 9th, bases loaded, 2 outs, 3 balls and two strikes. You are up to bat and the weight of the entire season is on your shoulders. You strike out, the season is over, you get a hit and the run scores from 3rd sending your team to the World Series. No pressure right? Ya, right, pressure like you have never felt before would be a better way t

As a mediator, I work with many couples who must agree upon a Child Support amount that makes sense to them and benefits their children the most. In the State of Illinois, where I practice, Child Support is based on a fixed percentage of the giver's "net" income. The more children you have, the higher the percentage applied.

There was a day, when I was 6 months pregnant, with 13-month-old twins when my 10-day estranged first ex-husband finally came home from a “business trip”, only to tell me, now mom at home, that he did not love me anymore and needed to leave “to figure out why”. Ten minutes later, he packed up a bag and slipped into the night. I could not speak or breathe after that sucker punch for what felt like hours. That was the beginning of a very long, lonely and stressful period of my life that would continue to evolve with the complicated and overall, messiness, of divorce.

Often you lose two things in a divorce: your marriage and what feels like a piece of your identity. Marriage has a funny way of making two people seem inextricable, two sides of the same coin to use a cliché. But then somewhere in the marriage, its sanctity fell apart and you’re left wondering what happened and possibly harboring negative thoughts about your marriage, your spouse, and/or yourself. Just know this—what you’re going through is common, and you’re not alo

Roommates, you may have had one when you were in college or just starting out so that you had someone to share the burden of expenses while you worked to become financially independent. Then eventually you met someone, took the leap of marriage and rather than having a roommate you now had a spouse. I actually had both! Yep, I was married about 5 years or so and one day my husband informs me that a friend of his will be coming to town to work with him in his new business venture. I asked "when is he coming". Husband says "he's on his way now"!

As human beings we have a remarkable capacity to adapt to our environment. Usually, we make adaptations because they help us feel better in some way. I like to think of the natural personalities we're born with as being like an amoeba - not well defined, kinda free-form and readily changeable to suit the environment. Changing and adapting our natural personalities is something that we all do during the course of growing up. It's part of learning about who we are, our place in the world, and what the world is like.

Two Kinds of Alimony: Contractual and Court Ordered maintenance There are two kinds of post-divorce alimony in Texas: contractual alimony and court ordered maintenance. The Texas Family Code also provides authority for the court to order temporary alimony which occurs while a divorce is ...

OK, I admit it. I like football. This season has been especially exciting to watch. Although I don’t understand all the strategies just yet, I enjoy watching the carefully planned plays. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don’t, but nevertheless, very fun stuff to watch. As I’m watching ...

You know that feeling. Some of us know it all too well during divorce and after divorce. When one of your grown children, after spending the weekend with your ex, tells you about the "new friend" that is at your ex's house. Or when you hear about the trip your ex is taking to Europe while you’re struggling to make ends meet. Ah, jealousy. The Green Eyed Monster that consumes us, when what we should really be doing is focusing on our own divorce recovery.

When we are experiencing or recovering from divorce after 50, remembering to find joy in everyday things can be difficult. One of the reasons that, despite our best efforts, we can find it almost impossible to move on is when we are prisoner to one of the ugliest feelings of all. Being bitter and resentful. Resentment is nasty. Unlike feelings of guilt and shame, what makes resentment so ugly is that it has a tendency to turn you, an otherwise kind and reasonable person, into someone who is so angry at their own life situation that it is impossible to recover.

When we are experiencing loss and sadness in our life, everyday can feel like a struggle. Whether it is recovering from loss of a loved one, divorce, a lay-off, or anything else, we forget to take care of ourselves and find joy at the time when we need it most. Learning how to reinvent ourselves, establish our independence again, and figure out what we want during this next chapter of our lives is a bit overwhelming. Oftentimes, we may forget to see all the wonderful things that await us.

There are many advantages to doing your own divorce. Three significant ones are: you'll get a better divorce, you'll save a lot of money, and you'll be able to keep things simple. Getting a good divorce Studies show that active participation in your divorce is the single most important factor ...

Surely divorce or the breakup of a long term relationship is one of the most difficult emotional experiences we have. Recently, I was working with Carrie Ann who had just painfully decided to end her 5 year relationship to Peter. She loved Peter very much. However, she had reached the realization that her values and Peters’ had grown to be very different, almost at opposite ends of the spectrum. Carrie Ann was committed to her personal growth, her career, wanted to get married and start a family within a year or two.

According to the Center for Disease Control's National Vital Statistics Report of 2002, 50% of first marriagesnended in divorce and 60% of remarriages end in divorce. But, the Center for Disease Control also found that 96% of Americans express a personal desire for marriage, andnalmost three-quarters of Americans believe marriage is anlife long commitment. I imagine that there are somewhatnsimilar statistics worldwide. With these kinds of statistics, its easy to see howncomp

DISCLAIMER: The following is NOT legal advice, nor is it a substitute for legal advice. If you are in Family Court you will need legal advice, so please see a lawyer.nnDivorced dads face many problems during Christmas and other holidays with their children. But there are solutions. Let me share a story about my experience with you:nnThe worst Christmas that I ever had was spent watching Godfather III in a theater after handing over my kids at 4:00 p.m. to their mom. But there

You have had a fight and quarreled with your ex over something and now you have had a break up..! Was it worth it? You and your partner love each other mad but these quarrels have been getting out of hand and finally the moment came when you called quits. It is only wise that you work on getting back to him/her and making up instead of going your own ways. Relationships have their own way of working and whatever happened was for the good of both of you. Learn from the lessons

Today, are going to take those lessons and learn how to apply that divorce gift so you can continue to move on with your life. Don’t think of yourself as just a “divorcee.” You are so much more than that. For years, you probably defined yourself as spouse, partner, and caregiver. Those definitions are all great, but they only make up a part of you. And when we tie ourselves to those definitions, we forget about all the things we once were. But you are now given the incredible gift of redefining yourself. What do you identify with? Are you are dreamer, thinker, and doer?

Divorce is one of the most traumatic things that can happen to you. Coping with the loss of a partner is incredibly hard and quite often friends and family won’t understand what you’re going through. Whether you’re the ‘dumper’ or the ‘dumpee’ (I apologise for the horrible terms but they are the best descriptio I’ve found) you are likely to feel shell-shocked when the split first happens. You are used to having another adult in the house and suddenly you’re alone, even if you have children, you will probably feel lonely.

I was speaking with a acquaintance of mine the other day who was a eager ‘watcher of people' as he names it and he asked me “are guys more content after Separation? He was puzzled as I seemed content and well adjusted (currently), while he knew an extra guy who was totally down and lost his job a short time ago and he had been broken up for 2 years! He of course had seen a number of divorced females in various states and was not really certain who was better off in terms

At this point in your divorce journey, you may have already done some research. You may have already talked to a lawyer. You may have already gone on some support forums to see if others have experienced the same crap that you are feeling right now. Some of what others on the forums, or what some in your support group say may make you feel better, and that’s great. But many times, that’s just a one-time feel-good solution that you soon forget the next time some BS comes your way.

Sadly, celebrity divorces make all the headlines for all the wrong reasons. They showcase the most unconscious behavior, especially when it comes to relationships. Kim Kardashian’s marriage gone off tracks after such a short time is just one more example.

Not a day goes by without at least one or more of these questions. We hope this list will help you in your decision. 1) Is my spouse entitled to half of everything I own?r

Can the emotional firestorm you are experiencing during divorce make you sick? Not only can divorce make you sick emotionally, it can definitely impact your health in many negative ways. In his book, Deadly Emotions, Don Colbert, M.D. explains that "The body cannot differentiate between stress that physical factors cause and stress that emotional factors cause. Stress is stress."

How To Stop My Wife From Leaving: How To Convince Your Wife To Stay With You Your wife wants out and you do not know what to do, obviously you still care for her or you would not be asking this question. You are determined to save your marriage, but are lost as to what should you rightly do. Read on to find out what you should you learn to make her stay and give you another chance. Find the real reason/s for her to take this step Firstly, you have to find out what has led her

Today, a lot of states and countries have the law of divorce and many people are getting a divorce just so easily. Every country and every state that has a law of divorce has their own different system on how to apply for a legal separation in their country. Indeed, divorce around the world is a lot interesting. What are the facts that you need to know about the divorce around the world? Why is it important to know these facts about the divorce around the globe? What other re

Many adults now acknowledge the benefit of a supportive professional as they face the challenges a divorce inevitably brings. But many parents are unsure at what point their child may be exhibiting signs that indicate a need for professional counseling. Many of these signs are similar to the symptoms adults experience when undergoing severe stress. Sleep disturbances Some children wake with nightmares or have great difficulty going to sleep, saying they are afraid (of monst

This article on Califo ia divorce separation will make the topic simple and easy to understand. You will know the difference between a divorce and legal separation by the end of this article. Since I'm a Califo ia Family Law atto ey, I'll explain this topic according to Califo ia divorce law. When a couple wants to end their marriage, there are three different ways to do so: nullity, dissolution, and legal separation. They can be a bit confusing at first, so let me give you a brief explanation on what makes these three processes different from each other.

Coping With Depression After Divorce for Men can be a difficult thing when everyone seems to have turned against you. I know a couple of months after my separation, after I finally realised that this was not going to go away I fell into a state of extreme sadness that it seemed would never leave me be. This is the case for many guys, even if they wear a big smile or laugh about it when you see them. In the hearts of many guys, a misery that threatens to destroy them is there

There are few things that can negatively affect your retirement plans more than a divorce in a community property state like California. If you face a divorce, there are many aspects of your short-term and long-term finances that must be worked out between you and your ex, either in the courts or by settlement. A face-to-face meeting with an experienced San Jose family law attorney is recommended before you proceed with the divorce. Generally, when you know what to expect bef

Are you scared to be alone? First of all, let me tell you that it is perfectly natural for you to have these feelings. I remember that just the thought of having a Friday night with no plans terrified me - not to mention actually enduring it. What happens is this: Your mind stops being busy with activity - activity - activity! You then have some space to remember and feel that your heart is broken. It's uncomfortable. It hurts. Therefore, in order to escape the pain, you do another activity - activity - activity!

The church I attend had a Burning Bowl ceremony this past Sunday, New Year's Eve. I'd never heard of anything like that before. It turned out to be a great idea. As the ceremony was explained, I remembered doing something similar with my two kids several years back.r

Divorce can be a very stressful time in your life. There are a number of issues you have to deal with such as custody, if you have children and dividing up property. But when the relationship between the two parties is toxic, that can make the situation far worse. The one thing a person cannot do when facing divorce is slip into a depression and feel as though their entire world is crumbling. Regardless of how tough it gets, you have to keep your chin up and realize that ever

At what point do you just let go after divorce? The emotional over whelm can become life consuming with legal issues, child custody battles and financial transitioning. What about the feelings of loss, how and when do you let go of it all? Divorce, as we all know, affects everyone involved. It’s not just the couple once in love, but children, parents, grandparents, friends, co-workers, teachers and on and on. Anger, frustration, feeling deceived or just plain hurting to the

As if dealing with the emotional roller coaster of divorce isn’t enough, the debt and financial challenges that go along with it, can frighten even the strongest of souls. Although it can be a very confusing time, there are some simple steps you can take to keep debt in check. Take things one ...

This important part of the Petition-Marriage, the “Statistical Facts”, is often overlooked by people anxious to complete the Petition for Dissolution of Marriage. In determining the correct date of marriage, the biggest challenge is usually poor memory. If you can’t remember when you were married, look at your marriage license. Some people who don’t want to be bothered with looking for their marriage license just guess, or put the month and year, which is acceptable. Using

You can have a better divorce and get more from your atto ey by following this advice from award-winning author and divorce expert atto ey Ed Sherman, founder of Nolo Press. Start with the right information. Before your first visit with your atto ey, find out about the rules and procedures ...

Psssst, wanna know a little divorce secret? Your daily divorce drama is an illusion. Sure, to you, it can feel all too real, but the fact is we get stuck in the drama mud because we have never been been taugt how to break ourselves away from it. People love to tell you to hold your head up high, and to be like Teflon, but during divorce nobody bothers to dig deeper into why you feel like crap, and how you can use that reasoning for getting unstuck.

People often think that they cannot leave a violent relationship for many reasons, not the least of which is retribution. However, the truth is that if you stay in a violent relationship you may never get out. To have the courage to stop the violence and create an exit strategy appears to be the ...

DON'T lie to your children with stories like "Dad is visiting relatives". Children know if you are trying to hide something, even if the purpose is honorable.nnDO talk to your children. Give them simple and straight-forward answers without vilifying ornblaming the other parent.nnDON'T put your children in the middle. That means don't ask them where they want to live or who they want to live with.nnDO explain to your children that the divorce is not their fault. This message i