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How honest are you willing to be with yourself regarding your intent?
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Sometimes, when there is conflict in a relationship, it's hard to tell if you are withdrawing ... Views: 1296
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
February 08, 2016
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Learning to discern the difference between mind and soul communication is essential to learning to love yourself. Learn how to tell when information is truth from Spirit or made up from the ... Views: 1294
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Discover that self-love and narcissism are actually opposites!
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It's interesting to me how often people confuse self-love with narcissism – because they are actually opposites in many ways.
Ramona ask a ... Views: 1269
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Do you have a misconception about what it means to be a strong and emotionally healthy person?
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Do you have an expectation that if you were emotionally healthy, you would not feel hurt in the face of others' ... Views: 1244
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Are you in a relationship with a man who is not sexual? You are not alone!
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In a question to me on one of my webinars, Melanie writes: "My husband is very loving, but not very sexual. I've tried to talk to him ... Views: 1238
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
March 14, 2016
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It is often tempting to tell others what to do, especially when it is obvious that they are not taking care of themselves. Discover why this usually backfires and what ... Views: 1221
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Do you sometimes have confusion regarding the value of a relationship?
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Jeanine asked me the following question at one of my free webinars:
"Hi Dr. Paul, thank you so much for your wonderful work and for ... Views: 1217
Do you try to control during conflict, or are you conflict avoidant? Neither works well to resolve conflict. Discover what does work!
Leslie asks:
"When I approach my partner to address an issue, he only sees me as controlling and creating 'controversy'. He can barely stand ... Views: 1216
If you grew up in a family where one or both parents used anger to control you, then anger likely plays a role in your life now.
Did you grow up with anger in your household? Did one or both of your parents use anger as a way to keep you in line and have control over you?
How did you ... Views: 1208
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We all deeply desire connection with others, but what is necessary for us to have this?
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When we were born, the most important thing to us was connection with our mother. We needed connection with her body for ... Views: 1194
Do you know how to lovingly manage and heal the loneliness and heartbreak of a breakup?
Breakups are challenging for most of us. However, on top of the heartbreak and grief of a breakup, we often make it worse by the things we say to ourselves. What are some of the things you tell ... Views: 1191
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
April 25, 2016
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Healing from a relationship with a narcissist is a learned process. Learn it now!
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Many of us have been there.
You met the person of your dreams – charming, ... Views: 1185
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Creating a loving relationship doesn't have to be as hard as you might think!
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As most of us know, relationships can be very challenging. We generally enter a relationship with ... Views: 1178
How is your relationship with your partner? What are the positive and negative aspects of your relationship?
What are the positive and negative aspects of your relationship?
When you and your partner are both operating as loving adults, you will experience many positive results. When one ... Views: 1169
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Do you continue to believe, in the face of all evidence to the contrary, that life should be fair? Discover a new way of looking at fairness.
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"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good ... Views: 1167
Have you ever wondered why God allows so much abuse, so much pain, so much war?
"God has no hands but these." - Mother Theresa
I am often asked by my clients, "If God is all powerful, why didn't he stop my father (or mother, or brother, or babysitter, or uncle ... Views: 1164
Dating provides many opportunities to learn and grow. Discover some of what you can learn that will be very valuable for you.
Franklin writes:
"I am a 68 year old male who was married for 27 years and now divorced 15 years. I have fallen in love with a woman after only three ... Views: 1149
Are you ready to discover the way to happiness? Are you ready to discover what Epictetus knew over 2000 years ago?
"There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will." ~Epictetus, AD 55-135
It's hard for ... Views: 1148
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Sometimes we are clueless regarding the subtle ways we are trying to control, while being very aware of a partner's controlling behavior.
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Tara asked me the following question:
"Dear Dr. Paul, How do you ... Views: 1147
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Pressuring yourself might be causing resistance, stress, anxiety, physical pain, insomnia and even illness.
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How many of you put a lot of pressure on yourself? How often do you feel anxious because of this ... Views: 1145
Are you being selfish if you do what brings you joy, even if others don't like it? Do you feel trapped, believing you can't really take loving care of yourself without being unloving to others?
One of the questions I often hear from my clients is, "If I take care of myself and do what brings ... Views: 1145
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Dealing with critical people, especially a parent, is a challenge for all of us. Here are some options for dealing with a critical mother.
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Having a critical mother is a big challenge. I know, because I grew up ... Views: 1144
Discover why you may be sabotaging and punishing yourself with your self-judgment and self-rejection.
Would you love to manifest your dreams and have the life you want? Most people would unhesitatingly respond with a resounding "YES!" Yet, do you sometimes find yourself ... Views: 1143
Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
February 29, 2016
Are there people in your life and wounded parts of yourself who want to limit you from being in your personal power?
How many of you had the experience growing up of being told in various ways to not claim your personal power and instead limit ... Views: 1138
Are you afraid to open your heart to love, for fear of getting hurt? Learn how to lovingly manage the hurt.
Is it possible to fully love without getting hurt? The answer is unequivocally NO!
Is this because love hurts? Again, the answer is NO!
It is not love that hurts. It's ... Views: 1134
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Are you perplexed regarding why you so often feel rejected by others?
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Alana asked me the following question:
"My whole life I have felt that I don't fit in with others - in my family, school, work - and ... Views: 1131
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Is being duped something you avoid at all costs, or are you willing to be duped in order to keep your heart open?
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No one likes being duped. It feels awful to realize that someone has pulled the wool over our ... Views: 1130
Many people confuse boundaries - which are a way of taking loving care of yourself – with controlling behavior toward others.
Marilee told me in one of our early phone sessions: "I set a boundary. I told him that he couldn't speak to me that way any more."
Jackson said to ... Views: 1119
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Are you conflict-avoidant? Does conflict terrify you? Discover how to heal this.
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Angela writes:
"I avoid conflict as much as possible because I cannot handle the anxiety it produces in me, as if I am going ... Views: 1108
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Do you get addictively stuck on the Internet and can't seem to find your way out?
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Our society provides many ways we can avoid our feelings addictively. Many people today are addicted to being on the Internet ... Views: 1103
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Love is not something that can be described – it needs to be experienced, and when you experience it through loving yourself, you will know how to love.
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We read many things about what love is and what it isn't ... Views: 1101
Have you found yourself in relationships where you feel empathy for your partner but your partner lacks empathy for you?
Were you born with the ability to feel others' feelings? I was, and one of the issues that I had to face was that not everyone is empathic.
This was very confusing to ... Views: 1101
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Are you seeking the formula for attracting the partner of your dreams? Here it is!
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Rochelle asks:
"If I assess myself quite objectively, if I know my accomplishments as well as my drawbacks, is there a ... Views: 1098
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Do you find that as soon as you really like someone – whether as a friend or as a partner – you 'lose your cool?'
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Relationships offer us more opportunities for personal growth than just about anything else in ... Views: 1095
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
April 18, 2016
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Have you wondered if you have an abandonment issue? Discover the answer to this question in this article – and what to do about it. ... Views: 1090
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Do you often feel overwhelmed with demands, tasks and life in general?
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Most of us lead very busy lives and it is easy to become overwhelmed with all we need to do. In addition, about 15% to 20% of us are born ... Views: 1089
Discover whether or not it is loving to yourself to give someone the benefit of the doubt.
I was having a Skype session with Raul. He was feeling down because a woman he has recently met rejected him. He was confused because he hadn't actually really liked her on their first date, but he ... Views: 1088
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Are you aware of the vast difference between expressing gratitude from your ego wounded self or from your loving adult self?
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"Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all ... Views: 1085
Is there something you've always wanted to do but have never done? What’s stopping you?
“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” –Chinese Proverb
How often do you say to yourself, "I wish I had…..?"
... Views: 1084
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Do you find yourself getting hurt over and over in relationships? Discover why.
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Do you find yourself falling hard for someone and then ending up feeling rejected and not good enough when it ends? This is the ... Views: 1082
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If you are single, do you relate to any of these false beliefs about being in a relationship?
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I have discovered that many of the single people I work with have a number of false beliefs about relationships. If ... Views: 1080
Are you a complainer? Are you ready to do something different?
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain." - Maya Angelou
Do you complain? If you do, why?
___I complain as a form of control - in the hopes ... Views: 1076
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What was valued and approved of in your family as you were growing up?
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When you were growing up, how did you learn to define your worth? Here are some of the things my clients have said to me:
• In my ... Views: 1069
You might not think you are selling your soul, but is this true?
What have you given up for money and possessions?
Have you given up kindness to get ahead?
Have you given up family time for a bigger TV?
Have you given up fun for a new car?
Have you given up hobbies for a ... Views: 1064
"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. --Michael Jordan, Former Professional Basketball Player and ... Views: 1059
Are you limiting your life – allowing fear to stop you from doing what brings you joy?
"There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." ~Nelson Mandela
Do you feel passionate about your ... Views: 1056
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Are you aware of the system you have created with your partner that may be causing you pain?
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I have worked with couples for 44 years, and one thing I can tell you for sure: relationships are a system, and each ... Views: 1054
If you are hard on yourself, do you believe that this is helpful to you? You might want to re-evaluate this false belief.
Are you hard on yourself? Do you think this is a good thing? Do you believe this motivates you to do better? Think again. If you are doing well, it's likely in ... Views: 1054
Do you have problems committing to a relationship, or are you involved with someone who has a fear of commitment?
Louis wrote to me:
"I have been dating an amazing girl, but recently ended it because I am not sure if she is good for me. Our relationship has ... Views: 1037
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Are you staying in an abusive relationship because you believe you can change it or not be bothered by it?
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The question of when to leave a relationship comes up over and over with my clients and with the ... Views: 1031