Browse published articles attributed to Tina Tessina, with full-archive search.
Dr. Romance: It is not necessary to argue about parenting your kids. Couples usually argue about how their parents raised them, and they want to do the same (or the opposite) of what their parents did. How Not to Pass Your Family Dysfunction on to your kids:
Dear Dr. Romance: I read your article on the Age Differences in Dating and found it to absolutely be brilliant. I'm wondering though since I'm dating a younger woman, what tips you have on dealing with that. Thanks. Any help you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Dr. Romance Responds:
Dear Dr. Romance: Why am i intimidating? after i start talking to guys and i've hooked up with them, some have told me i am intimidating and they become shy in person. I'm not like scary or creepy or anything. (i'm tall skinny, blonde hair n blue eyes.) but is there anything i can do to fix that? Is it a bad thing"? Dear Reader:
OK, guys, you're (gulp) ready to pop the big question. But you've seen those videos of lavish proposals that went wrong. How do you ask her in a way that's got an excellent chance of getting a happy "yes!" in response? Here's how to set yourself up for success and a lifetime of happiness. Dr. Romance on how to propose
If you and your partner are not on the same page sexually, you need to learn how to talk with each other about sex: Dr. Romance's Guidelines for Creating a Sexual Agreement: * Set up a problem-solving session: * Having a time to talk about sex will help you create trust and sexual openness which makes finding solutions much easier. * Begin with reassurance and good will, reminding each other of your love and of your desire that your sexual relationship be fulfilling for both of you.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Going through a divorce is devastating. You not only lose the marriage and break up your family; you also lose all the hopes and dreams you had for happiness here. Dr. Romance helps you to pick yourself up from the rubble and move on emotionally.
Dr. Romance writes: The divorce was ugly, your ex was a jerk, but you still need to have contact because of your kids or finances. You hate to have to deal with the ex, but you have to. What can you do to make it better for yourself and your kids? Here are ways to ignore your ex's loutishness or craziness and make the relationship work for you. Dr. Romance’s 3 tips to dealing with a difficult ex
Dear Dr. Romance: My question of the week is how to deal with family opposition of my inter-racial relationship. My dad, who is in his 70s, is vehemently opposed to my relationship with my fiance (who is white). He hasn't even met him and given him a chance. It is quite frustrating given that our wedding is in a few months and I'm not even sure he will come. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Dear Reader:
Dr. Romance writes: What do you do after you have tried everything and your partner, friend, child or colleague still won't negotiate?
We were having lunch with our step-granddaughter, Natalie, 2 1/2 and her grandmother last week at Heritage Family Pantry in Lakewood, when a rather rotund gentleman with a flowing white beard, sweatshirt and jeans walked by our window and came into the cafe. Natalie's grandmother said he was Santa Claus, and at first, Natalie ducked her head and said "I scared." After a few minutes, though, she was craning her neck to see where he was sitting, at the other side of the cafe.
A practical article connected into the broader SelfGrowth topic graph.
Dr. Romance writes: Sooner or later all of us question the meaning of life. The sooner we get to it, the better chance we have of finding a satisfactory answer. If you're at home alone, due to the pandemic, this is a great time to learn introspection, the awareness of self.
Dear Dr. Romance: How can one get over the nervousness of dating again when its been quite a few years since their last date? Dear Reader: If your last relationship lasted for a while, dating again can be a scary proposition. These guidelines can help: Dr. Romance's Guidelines for Successful Dating
Dear Dr. Romance: is it normal to like the feeling of glass cutting your skin? I like the feeling of getting cut.......this isnt good is it?... Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: What is more important in a relationship: being balanced or compatible? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance; I read your article "Age Differences in Dating" I am dating a man who is 22 yrs, younger than myself. He appeared older and I appeared younger to him. Now I'm afraid the age difference means our relationship won't work. Would you be able to help me with this dilemma?
Dr. Romance writes: Should you stay in your marriage? Marriage can be frustrating and disappointing, especially if you don't have the skills to fix it. But giving in to the frustration and leaving may turn out to be the worst thing you ever did. Consider these reasons to stay:
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a 23 year old single mother and believe me when I say my life has been crazy and very rough. I have no relationship with the father of my child. He's pretty much abandoned our four year old son after his 1st birthday. He doesn't help out, and blames everything on me, so I don't even speak with him anymore.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Many guys, especially younger ones, are well known for having 'courting behavior' and then relaxing into their old, slobby selves once you're committed. It's not that men are from Mars, women from Venus - it's more like all of us have grown up on different planets. Couples can get caught up in arguing about who's right, rather than focusing on what will work.
Dear Dr. Romance: I know I feel strongly about a certain someone. Do I surprise her with a gift or e-mail her with my recent feelings through a tough time? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance,
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: My husband and I are always getting into arguments and fights. I am writing to you through someone else's email because if I tell my husband about contacting you we will probably get into a fight. He does not want to go to a therapist or get any type of counseling. Do you think I should tell him anyway? I think about ending the marriage but then I go back thinking it will get better.
Work can be the ideal environment for falling in love: you are in close proximity for a long period of time, you may have developed a good working partnership, and from there it is a short step to romance. However, workplace romance can present big problems. Dr. Romance helps you figure out the right and wrong ways to do it.
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a single mother suffering in depression and stress.
Dear Dr. Romance: How can one be sure that a person they met through a dating service is not disturbed in any way? What type of safety precautions can one take? Dear Reader:
Dr. Romance writes: As a therapist, I have worked with many clients who had been going to a previous therapist for years, and getting nowhere. Some therapists just listen and sympathize, but will not challenge a client to move through and past trauma and stuck places. If talking to friends and family, or even your therapist, doesn’t help you move on past old traumas, let go of toxic relationships, or move through your grief and emotional pain, it’s time to get some effective therapy.
Dear Dr. Romance,
Dr Romance’s 3 tips for living with someone instead of marriage: It's way too easy, in the throes of a new romance, to decide to live together without considering the problems that might arise. Dr. Romance gives you some things to think about before making the leap, to guarantee success.
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a high school assistant and I fell in love with mother of one of my students. She doesn't know anything about and has some difficulty with her son's wife. I told her I want to help you to sort out your problem, but I have no idea how to help her and how about my love how do I forget it that she is married and I am single. Dear Reader:
Moving in together is a financial commitment, and so is marriage, so it’s important to consider the tough issues you’ll face as a cohabiting or married couple. Dr. Romance's Financial Questions to Ask Before Marriage or Moving in Together
Dear Dr Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a single mom, of a teenage son. I was never married to his dad (if you want to call him that). I have the hardest time finding a relationship cuz I am on SS income and I am judged by that. I am a loving person, the good guys want a woman that works or is very active. I'm not able to do either. So how can I find a good man to love me for me? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: Last year, my boyfriend he broke up with me 3 days before my birthday. On the actual day, he didn't even so much as text or call to wish me a happy birthday - or even send me a card. I was devastated, esp because I really made a big deal of his birthday last year - bought him a very expensive cake, made him dinner, got him a thoughtful gift and card, etc.
Dr. Romance writes:
Dear Dr. Romance: I saw you on the web and thought I would ask you about my attraction to my plastic surgeon. I am almost 50, and have been having procedures done for 6 months now. He is my age and married with 2 school-age children and a younger wife. I have very strong feelings for him and NO, it is not transference. I have felt that before while in therapy and this is different.
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a middle eastern single mother in my late twenties. suffering from depression and stress. As a child, I always wanted extra care and attention from my parents. I was closer to my father than my mother. When I was molested by an uncle, I complained to my parents but they did nothing. I used to cut myself and cry at night.
According to twentytwowords.com, Hugh said “You love each other — and respect each other. You truly want to be together.” Respect and caring are so important in determining who will stay together. Respect and caring create what I call mutuality in the relationship. Mutuality means that love, respect and caring are felt equally by both partners, and shown equally by both partners.
Dr. Romance writes: Love, commitment and relationships seem to be in disfavor these days. I'm seeing a lot of articles and TV shows saying love doesn't last, so why bother. No matter what the media is saying, I believe that all of us want to be loved, and I know from experience that a relationship can work, and that a great partnership is a joy not to be missed.
Dear Dr. Romance: