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Browse published articles attributed to Tina Tessina, with full-archive search.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes: When you get the devastating news that your spouse has had an affair, how do you decide whether to stay or go? Because you feel betrayed, your first impulse is usually anger, and wanting to leave – fight or flight. But, after you calm down, you realize there’s a lot you’ll lose, and you may have children to consider.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes: Those of you who have read my articles know that I am always talking about the importance of good communication, urging better communication, and giving skills for being better understood. Communication is one of the most important aspects of relationships; positive and negative. However, talk is not necessarily communication; and there are lots of non-verbal ways to communicate.
Dear Dr. Romance: Almost all of my friends have boyfriends, (we're 22, turning 23) and i don't. i never have. i feel really alone during the wk bc all my friends are with their boyfriends. i basically work, take class, and that's it. i either need a boyfriend, or more friends, bc i'm lonely and hate it!! :( Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm in college in another country. I have relation with my girl friend since last 3 and half years ago. We have done sexual job in 4 times. She is very honest and easy going girl. But she stopped her study. I have a good relationship with her still today, As long as I know she has no objection to marry me.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes: There is so much unrest in the world today: we are still in two wars, terrorism seems to be endemic worldwide, and domestic violence still dominates the news. We still need to heed the old bumper sticker: TEACH PEACE. The more current one on my car says “Peace is Patriotic.”
Dr. Romance writes: Many of my clients come in with complaints about personal habits that feel toxic in their lives. Just as you can detox your body when you’re feeling sluggish, it’s also possible to detox your emotional life. Here are some of the most common ways your life can back up on you, and how to handle it. 1. Frequently late
A practical article connected into the broader SelfGrowth topic graph.
Dear Dr. Romance: I have had baby with this girl and we are planning to marry this year. Just last we were talking about things we do not like and the things that we like. I said she was unfaithful before we had the baby and she said that not true but that she was lesbian was sleeping With this lady she had started this with when she was in junior school.
Dear Dr. Romance: I enjoy reading your "Happiness Tips Newsletter" I actually want to ask you some questions. I know you are a psychotherapist, So i thought you might to explain the difference between the mental health unit of an hospital and a psych ward? Why would one feel ashamed to have stepped in there for one reason or another?
Dear Dr. Romance: I saw your article "Guidelines for Improving the Odds to a New Relationship with your Ex" in divorce360.com
Dr. Romance writes: We are such an inventive species. We are also a species with a sense of humor. I think the two are connected. It takes a sense of humor to be able to stumble around in an unfamiliar situation until you figure it out. Current research has indicated that humor, specifically laughter, counteracts the devastations of stress on the body and immune system. So, it’s obvious to me that a sense of humor would ease the stress of new situations.
Dear Dr. Romance: We'd been really close and intimate. I thought we were going to be in a special relationship soon because he told me we were having something special. No matter how tired he was, he'd had his dinner with me.
Dr. Romance writes: You have probably entered relationships madly in love, convinced that your feelings for each other were so strong your dream would carry you through the tough times, but wound up feeling more like you were living in a nightmare than a dream, struggling with conflicting wants and needs. If you don’t know how to work together effectively to solve the conflict, the resulting frustration, anger and battles make the relationship more and more unpleasant and difficult to sustain.
Dear Dr. Romance: I heard you on the radio and I thought of writing to you. This is about my daughter. She has been married for a couple of years. They are both professionals. Since you listen to many cases and have a vast experience on divorce cases, I would like to ask you based on the following situation, should my daughter cut the loss now and take divorce or should she continue the marriage with the hope that it will be o.k. -Last time when they had a fight, he told me that he will not hesitate to take divorce even if they have kids.
Last month, Dr. Romance received the following letter from a reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: I read your monthly "Happiness Tips" newsletter and thank you your advice. However, I noticed that you try to help resolve or forestall relationship problems. My problem is still meeting a man that I like. When I go out and see a guy I am attracted to, I do look towards that man and "let" him know Ilike him. That guy usually looks at me back , but just does not approach me.
Dr. Romance has heard a lot of whining and complaining lately, so I thought I'd give you some tips on dealing with disappointment:
Dear Dr. Romance: Why am i intimidating? after i start talking to guys and i've hooked up with them, some have told me i am intimidating and they become shy in person. I'm not like scary or creepy or anything. (i'm tall skinny, blonde hair n blue eyes.) but is there anything i can do to fix that? Is it a bad thing"? Dear Reader:
We were having lunch with our step-granddaughter, Natalie, 2 1/2 and her grandmother last week at Heritage Family Pantry in Lakewood, when a rather rotund gentleman with a flowing white beard, sweatshirt and jeans walked by our window and came into the cafe. Natalie's grandmother said he was Santa Claus, and at first, Natalie ducked her head and said "I scared." After a few minutes, though, she was craning her neck to see where he was sitting, at the other side of the cafe.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance, Should a man expect a woman to want to become involved with him when he is still best friends with is ex-lover--and he is a renter in her house? He claims it is all over between them, but I don't see how he or the ex-love should expect a woman to feel comfortable fitting into this arrangement. Please, I would love some perspective. Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance:
You and your new spouse are over the moon about having a baby, but the children from your previous marriage are acting strange and upset or distant. What's wrong, and how do you fix it? Tina B. Tessina, PhD, "Dr. Romance" licensed psychotherapist and author, gives you steps to follow to make sure everyone gets onboard with the blessed event.
Dr. Romance writes: In today's world, people don't often realize the importance of companionship until later in life. Staying fit and physically and socially active increases your odds of finding someone to date, and also increases your libido and your chances of successful sex. But, beware of too much focus on the surface, and not enough content. Such relationships quickly become empty and stressful.
Dear Dr. Romance: I am married 19 years and my husband and I have two children. We have a good marriage in so many ways yet we continuously cycle to a low point every couple of months primarily due to my change in mood and feelings about the relationship. A bad case of ambivalence on my part. We recently had a nice break from one another with my travel for work. We decided to let go of the past negatives we know about one another and our relationship and start fresh. I really like this idea.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: What suggestions can you offer for guests at funerals in regards to comforting families in morning? Thanks! Dear Reader: Your presence at the memorial or funeral, honoring their loved one who passed, is the most comfort, so go if you can.
Dear Dr. Romance: I knew a girl for a long time and had a huge crush on her. I'm in my twenties, and she is a year younger than me. I am a very shy person and would freeze up whenever I tried to tell her. We knew each other for more than a year and were good friends, so I told her, trying not to appear creepy and such. Luckily, she wanted more than friendship and we briefly dated (maybe a month), until she told me that she "didn't want to go out with with anyone".
Dear Dr. Romance: We are co-workers and I've know him for about two years. He's very nice, funny and in very good shape. We've built a pretty solid friendship. We hang out a couple times a month (when I'm home from school). But, lately he's been pushing for a relationship (seeing as how I'm graduating next year).
Dear Dr. Romance: When one hits a setback in life what are some healthy ways to keep moving forward? How can one build a healthy mental outlook when things go wrong? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: I am a university student majoring in English Translation in a Mid Eastern country. I find it difficult to attract other people's attention and it makes friendship nearly impossible. I love loneliness in a way that most of my friends don't approve. I feel happy sometimes but suddenly I do not like to be with anybody, even my close friends or loved ones. I just want to be alone.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I was browsing the net and came across one of your articles "From Friends to Lovers and Back" which I found very interesting as it relates to a situatio I am facing currently.
Dear Dr. Romance : I already know my heart's desire; it reminds me daily. I want to get married. I want a mate. I want children. My problem is, this is not happening now. I have been single for a very, very long time. I don't need to get to "know myself" because I've been alone, what seems like forever, knowing myself. I am self-assured in the person that I am. I am fully acquainted with who I am: A woman in my late thirties who wants a partner to share my life with.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance I met a girl about three years ago at work. We both saw a connection, but neither one of us followed up on it. We were both in relationships, she was married. Several months later she told me things weren't good at home and we had started talking. She and I became inseparable. She worked with me all of the time and we spent tons of time together. We did everything like we were a couple, best friends as well as lovers. She said I am the love of her life.
Dear Dr. Romance: