Why I admonish folks about dating after divorce: when I left my spouse, I was so hurt and bewildered that I didn’t know who I was or what matrimony was really about. So the first “pleasant” guy who showed an interest in me, flattered me, asked me out – and wanted to tie the knot, pretty much got me. So I had a six month marriage and found out a) I didn’t know much about me – but was well on my way to learning and b) I surely didn’t know what it took to make matrimony work out – and was well on my way to learning.
So when is it correct to launch into dating after divorce? It’s up to you. Here are some inquiries to make of yourself to decide if you are really ready:
1. Can I leave my kids and not feel in the wrong? Are you aware that taking care of yourself keeps your children from feeling in charge of you as they grow up?
2. Have I begun to comprehend what was off beam with my marriage? Are you looking?
3. Am I willing be accountable for my part in the marriage? Are you still seeing it as all his/her responsibility?
4. Do I love myself? Do you need to date so someone else can let you know you are acceptable?
5. Have I learned to take pleasure in my own company? Are you dating so you don't have to be by yourself?
6. Do I have great support while I go on this new journey with my new self? If you have candid support – a friend, a Relationship Coach, a therapist – someone who isn't afraid to tell you what they see is true for you.
You can't make a mistake that you can make if you keep in mind that Life Is a School so don't be scared. It all works out OK.
Author's Bio
For years Maia played various key roles assisting best-selling author, John Gray in developing and promoting material from his books, including bestseller Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. She created, coached, trained and supported a worldwide community of 500 speakers enabling them to publicly lecture about the Mars Venus material to singles, couples, parents and corporations like AT&T. Additionally, she participated in training Oprah and staff in a private 3-day workshop.
Maia's clients benefit from her tender wisdom acquired from living what she teaches. Maia says about herself, "I have a natural ability to help people see what's good about what's going on in their lives."
Maia is noted for gentle intervention. If you are wanting strong, directive and authoritarian in a coach, that is not Maia. Participants in workshops with Maia have dubbed her 'Wise Fairy God Mother' and she has gratefully decided to accept it.
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