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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- I Met A Special A Dog - by Submitted on Nov 02, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was out walking the other day, I ended up seeing someone who I usually talk to. Usually, I speak to him outside his house while he is working in his garden but this time he was out walking his dog. The last time I remember seeing the dog was when he was running around a field, ...
Views: 342 - Success: Can The Fear Of Being Unloved Stop Someone From Being Successful? - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone can have the need to grow and develop, it doesn’t mean that they will be able to do so. One could find that they have been working hard and doing the “right” things but that they haven’t been able to get very far. As a result of this, they could believe that, unlike others, ...
Views: 342 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother Enmeshed Man Need To See His Mother Differently? - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for a man to deal with an issue that he has, he will need to be aware of the issue; naturally, if he is not aware of it, it won’t be possible for him to do anything about it. The first step, then, if a man is emotionally entangled with his mother, will be for him to realise that this is ...
Views: 341 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man’s Wounded Inner Child Cause Him To Be Attracted To The Wrong Women? - by Submitted on Oct 13, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhat a man could find, if he was able to take a step back and reflect on his life, is that he has the tendency to end up with women who are unhealthy. There is the chance that he is currently with a woman who is like this. If he isn’t, it might be easier for him to realise what it was about ...
Views: 341 - Rescued: Can Someone Have The Need To Be Rescued If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone may not realise that they have the need to be rescued, this is something that they would soon see if they were able to reflect on their life. By doing this, the evidence would start to appear. Now, it could seem strange how someone could be in this position and not be aware ...
Views: 341 - Self Worth: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Feel Totally Worthless? - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone can lack a felt sense of worth, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. Even so, they may be aware of the impact of not having this in place. The reason they may be aware as opposed to will be aware of this is because how they experience life could just ...
Views: 341 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Find It Hard To Activate Himself? - by Submitted on Oct 09, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is overly preoccupied with his mother’s needs and just about his whole life revolves around her, he is going to be more like her parent than her son. But, although he will be neglecting himself, he can believe that he is doing the right thing. Along with this, there will be the ...
Views: 341 - Child Abuse: What Can Happen If Someone Was Regularly Humiliated During Their Childhood? - by Submitted on Feb 03, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperOne of the challenges with early abuse and neglect is that by the time someone is an adult, they can have no recollection of what took place at this stage of their life. This is not to say that once they get to this stage of their life, they will have chosen to block it out. No, what it comes ...
Views: 340 - Early Deprivation: Can Someone Believe That They Need To Earn The Right To Exist If They Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Feb 26, 2024 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to spend most of their time doing things. Therefore, they will rarely if ever take the time to relax and recharge. But, if this was pointed out to them, it doesn’t mean that they would be able to accept this. For example, they could say that life is too short ...
Views: 340 - Entitlement: Can Developmental Trauma Stop Someone From Developing A Healthy Sense Of Entitlement? - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat could stand out, that’s if someone was to step back and reflect on their life, is that they give a lot but they don’t receive much back. After this, they could find that they don’t believe that they deserve to have what they need and want. Due to this, it is not going to matter how much ...
Views: 340 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Find It Hard To Trust If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for a man to go to sleep at night and to leave his bed in the morning, he will need to have a sense of trust. Without this, he won’t be able to let go and fall asleep and he won’t be willing to leave his home and go out into the world. However, although he might be able to do this, ...
Views: 340 - Relationships: Why Would A Man Only Be Attracted To Women That He Can Control? - by Submitted on May 22, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt this point in time, a man could be with a woman who is anything but his equal, and this might be how it has been with a number of other women. Now, she might be the same age as him or very close to his age, or there could be a number of years between them. However, regardless of this, she ...
Views: 340 - Self-Ownership: Can Child Abuse Stop Someone From Developing A Sense Of Sovereignty? - by Submitted on Dec 16, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIn the same way that someone would say that they own their phone or their shoes, for instance, they could also say the same thing about themselves. When it comes to who they are, this will be their mind and body. By owing themselves, no one else will have the right to use their mind or body. ...
Views: 340 - Being Seen: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Engage In An Unconscious Struggle To Be Seen? - by Submitted on Jan 01, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperBeing seen is important but it doesn’t mean that everyone on this planet generally feels seen. When someone does feel seen, it will be a time when another person not only looks at them but also tunes into what is going on for them and displays empathy. Therefore, they are not going to see ...
Views: 338 - Emotionally Shut Down: Is Childhood Trauma The Reason Why Someone Is Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Aug 31, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough human beings are emotional beings, it wouldn’t be right to say that every human being on the planet comes across as one. There are those who are in tune with how they feel and there are those who are typically out of touch with how they feel. Consequently, there are those who appear ...
Views: 338 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother-Enmeshed Man Engaging In Repetition Compulsion? - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in touch with their own needs and does what they can to fulfil them, it will probably be hard for them to comprehend why a man would be so focused on his mother and her needs. To them, it will be clear that he is neglecting his own needs and living a very watered down life as a ...
Views: 338 - Needs: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Be Ashamed Of Their Own Needs? - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperHaving needs is simply part of the human experience and is not something that is bad or wrong. However, although this is the case, it doesn't mean that everyone on this planet feels comfortable with their needs. When someone doesn't feel comfortable with them, their life is going to be a lot ...
Views: 338 - Trust: Can Someone Find It Hard To Trust If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Aug 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn general, someone could find that they have the need to keep people at arm’s length, preferring not to get too close to them. They could find that this is how they have been for as long as they can remember. By being this way, they are unlikely to share a great deal about themselves. When ...
Views: 338 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Be Domesticated If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Dec 19, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIn the same way that an animal can be someone’s pet, a man can be in a very similar position. He will then, like the animal, be just about out of touch with his instincts and it won’t be difficult to control him. The difference is that while the animal will primarily be controlled at home, ...
Views: 337 - Healing Journey: Can Someone Try To Do Everything By Themselves If They Were Neglected During Their Early Years? - by Submitted on Jun 25, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter getting to the stage where they can see that they are not in a good way, someone can look for a way to change their life. There is a chance that they have been this way for quite some time. Either way, they will have taken a big step by becoming aware of what is going as if this hasn’t ...
Views: 337 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Does Mother Enmeshed Man Want To Rescue His Mother? - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhile both her son and his mother will be adults, he can have the need to essentially save his mother. It then won’t matter if he is not a doctor or a therapist, for instance, as he will do what he can to resolve all her issues. Now, this could mean that his mother is deeply unwell and has ...
Views: 337 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother-Enmeshed Mans Mother An Energy Vampire? - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man will look like an adult, if his mother used him to meet some of her adult and unmet childhood needs during his early years, he is unlikely to feel like one. Instead, he is likely to feel like a boy. However, he is unlikely to feel like a boy who has been treated well; he is ...
Views: 337 - Critical Thinking: Is Putin A Manifestation Of Humanity’s Shadow? - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWith what is taking place in Ukraine and the damage that is being done, it can seem as though the main problem is the president of Russia – Vladimir Putin. The reason for this is that he is at the forefront of what is taking place. So, if he was to change his mind and put an end to what is ...
Views: 336 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother-Enmeshed Man Waiting For His Mother To Liberate Him? - by Submitted on May 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man spends a lot of his time and energy doing things for his mother, it will be pretty clear to the outside observer that he is out of balance. That is, of course, unless he is seen as living in the right way. If he is seen as living in the right way, it could show that this person ...
Views: 336 - Relationships: Can Someone’s Childhood Set Them Up To Believe That It Is Their Responsibility To Save Others? - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat could be normal is for someone to continually end up with people who are unable to truly be there for them. When they are in a relationship, then, it could be as though they are with a child as opposed to an adult. There is a chance that they are currently in a relationship with someone ...
Views: 336 - Self-Abandonment: Can Someone Abandon Themselves If They Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Dec 03, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was able to step back and reflect on their life, what they might soon realise is that they are rarely there for themselves. In other words, they are going to be like someone who owns a dog but who typically leaves the dog outside and forgets to feed it. As a result of this, they ...
Views: 336 - Sense Of Safety: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Believe That It Isn’t Safe Enough To Exist? - by Submitted on Apr 01, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen it comes to living a life that is worth living, it will be essential for someone to have a felt sense of safety. The reason for this is that this will allow them to be connected to their body, so their needs and feelings, and thus to express themselves. This will mean that they will look ...
Views: 336 - Father Wounds: Can A Be Difficult For A Boy To Grow Into A Man If His Father Was Abusive? - by Submitted on May 16, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for a boy to not just grow into a man but to act like one, it will be essential for him to receive the right care and guidance. For this to take place, both his mother and father will play an important role. His mother will provide him with the care that he needs to emotionally ...
Views: 335 - Child Abuse: Is Someone Engaging In Repetition Compulsion If They Are Looking For Their Parents To Acknowledge They Were Abusive? - by Submitted on May 01, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter coming to see that their early years were anything but nurturing, someone could spend a fair amount of time trying to get through to their parent/parents. This could be something that hasn’t been going on for very long. Then again, this could be something that has been taking place for ...
Views: 334 - Relationships: Why Can’t Someone Just Leave An Abusive Relationship? - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf one was to hear about someone who is in an abusive relationship, they could wonder why they haven’t walked away from their partner. This could be seen as not just what is right but also what is logical. Now, this could be someone they know, or it could be someone who they have heard about ...
Views: 334 - Rescued: Can Someone Have The Need To Be Rescued If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone may not realise that they have the need to be rescued, this is something that they would soon see if they were able to reflect on their life. By doing this, the evidence would start to appear. Now, it could seem strange how someone could be in this position and not be aware ...
Views: 334 - Achievement: Why Would Someone Feel Depressed After They Have Achieved Something? - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt this point in time, someone may be working towards something, and this could be something that they hope to achieve in a few months or it could be slightly longer. And, due to how important it is to them, it could also consume a lot of their attention. So, throughout the day and when they ...
Views: 333 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Realise That He Is Not Responsible For His Mothers Well-Being? - by Submitted on Nov 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man might not be consciously aware of this, his main priority could be to make sure that his mother is ok. Then again, there could be times when it goes further than this, with him having the need to make sure that she is happy. As a result of this, it is likely to be normal for ...
Views: 333 - Needless: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Be Needless? - by Submitted on Feb 18, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNow, although someone is interdependent and therefore needs others, it doesn’t mean that they realise this. If they were told this, they could say that they don’t need others and are happy being by themselves. So, by being this way, they are going to see themselves as being independent and ...
Views: 332 - Belonging: Can Early Deprivation Stop Someone From Developing A Felt Sense Of Belonging? - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to step back and reflect on their life, what might soon enter their mind is that they often feel unwelcome and as though they don’t deserve to be somewhere. This could be something that they experience when they are at work, with friends and even with family. Due to this, they ...
Views: 331 - Childhood Trauma: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Slowly Kill Themselves? - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperA lot has been said in recent years about the number of people who are taking their own life and how this has got worse over time. Along with this, there are the people who often think about calling it a day. With this in mind, it would be easy to assume that if someone wants their life to ...
Views: 331 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Hide His Needs If He Had A Neglectful Mother? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperHaving needs is part of the human experience, and this means that they are not bad or wrong. However, although this is the case, a man can be in a position where he has the need to hide most of his needs. This can be something that typically takes place without him even being aware of what is ...
Views: 331 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Man’s Mother Have A Fear Of Being Abandoned? - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he is overly involved with his mother and neglects his own life, it could be said that while one of them will be getting something from this arrangement the other person won’t be. The man’s mother will have someone there to take care of her needs and her son, the ...
Views: 330 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Would A Mother-Enmeshed Man Feel Weighed Down By A Woman’s Needs? - by Submitted on Jul 16, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperNow that a man is in a relationship, what he could find is that he often feels overwhelmed when his partner expresses her needs. However, when they first started spending time together, this might not have been an issue. At this point, he may have felt free and been able to express himself in ...
Views: 330 - Past Life: Can Past Life Trauma Give Someone The Need To Hide Themselves? - by Submitted on Jun 07, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may see, if they were able to step back and reflect on their life, is that they rarely reveal themselves. This is going to mean that their true self, so their needs and feelings, will typically be covered up. When they are around others, then, they are largely going to put on an ...
Views: 330 - Relationships: Can Someone’s Childhood Cause Them To Play The Victim Role In A Relationship? - by Submitted on Jul 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperRight now, someone could be in a relationship that is not very fulfilling, and there could be a number of reasons why this is. Now, this could be because they are with someone who is incredibly abusive but, then again, it might not be this severe. Instead, they could be with someone who ...
Views: 330 - Submissive: Can Someone Be Submissive If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn general, someone can find that they are easy-going and rarely if ever assert themselves. They are then going to typically go with the flow and not act like a separate individual who has their own needs and feelings. It could be as though their own will is not very strong and even ...
Views: 330 - Withdrawal: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Withdraw Under Stress? - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone experiences stress, they could soon feel the need to get away from everyone and everything. As a result of this, they end up pulling themselves away from life. This could mean that they will spend a lot of time at home and only go out when they need to. They might rarely answer ...
Views: 330 - Early Deprivation: What Expectations Can Someone Have If They Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Feb 16, 2024 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often said that someone shouldn’t have any expectations. One of the reasons that is put forward is that, by having them, they are likely to end up being let down. However, even if someone is able to arrive at a place where they no longer expect anything, it doesn’t mean that they won’t ...
Views: 329 - Father Wounds: Can A Mans Masculinity Be Knocked Out Of Him If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhat a man could see, if he was to take a step back and to reflect on his life, is that he finds it hard to get things done and is often passive. Along with being this way, he could find that he spends a lot of time feeling depressed. So, instead of being able to ‘take life by the horns’, so ...
Views: 329 - Father Wounds: Can Man Be Disconnected From His Body If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperDuring a man’s childhood years, he may have had a father who was physically abusive. If this was the case, this would have been a time when he was regularly harmed by someone who was supposed to do the opposite - protect him. Therefore, instead of being able to feel safe and secure in his own ...
Views: 329 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Be Depressed? - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperDue to the mask that a mother-enmeshed man is likely to wear, he can create the impression that he is happy and is pleased with his life. Behind the facade that he presents to the world, though, will be what is actually going on for him. If he was to be with himself and embraced how he really ...
Views: 329 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Was A Mother-Enmeshed Mans Father An Enabler? - by Submitted on Oct 01, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being able to see that his mother used him during his early years to meet some of her adult and unmet childhood needs, a man can end up experiencing a lot of anger and rage towards her. What can make this even worse is that this can be what has also taken place throughout his adult ...
Views: 329 - Being Seen: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Continually End Up In Situations Where They Are Not Seen? - by Submitted on Dec 22, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperJust because someone has the need to be seen, it doesn’t mean that they will generally be able to fulfil this need. They could often feel invisible and as though they don’t even exist. But, if this is just what is normal, it is unlikely to be something that will stand out. This is then just ...
Views: 328 - Child Abuse: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Live In Flight Mode As An Adult? - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone is a human being, based on how they typically behave, they could be described as a human doing. The reason for this is that they could practically always be on the go. And, if they were to sit still for a short moment, they could soon end up feeling deeply irritated and end ...
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