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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- Mother Wounds: Why Would A Man Attract Abusive Women? - by Submitted on Aug 07, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperOver the years, a man may have been with a number of women who were anything but nurturing. These women may have undermined him in a variety of different ways and made his life a misery. Once his time with one of these women came to an end, it might have taken him a number of months if not ...
Views: 242 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Fear Women If He Had A Cruel Mother? - by Submitted on Oct 14, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperMost if not all of the experiences that a man had during his formative years might have been forgotten about by his conscious mind. Therefore, most of what took place during this stage of his life could be a mystery. Nevertheless, while this might be the case, it doesn’t mean that what took ...
Views: 242 - Self-Assertion: Can Child Abuse Stop Someone From Being Able To Assert Themselves? - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAs one is an individual that has their own needs and feelings, there will be moments when they don’t want to do what another person wants them to do or agree with what they say. During such moments, it will be in their best interest to do something else or express a different viewpoint. If ...
Views: 242 - Self-Sabotage: Can Early Derivation Cause Someone To Carry Different Entities Inside Them? - by Submitted on Jan 02, 2024 from Oliver JR CooperRight now, someone could have a few areas of their life that are going well and a few that are not. This could be how their life has been for as long as they can remember. Due to this, they could have well and truly had enough and be desperate for their life to change. But, if this has been ...
Views: 242 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Have The Need To Be Perfect If They Had A Highly Critical Parent? - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was brought up in an environment that was extremely conditional and there was very little love on offer, it doesn’t mean that this is something that they will be aware of now that they are an adult. In fact, if they were to think about this stage of their life, they might not be able ...
Views: 241 - Child Abuse: What Can Happen If Someone Was Both Idolised And Demonised During Their Childhood? - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAs a child, someone generally needed to be treated as though they deserved to exist and were valuable and lovable, among other things. If this is what took place, now that they are an adult, there is a strong chance that they will have developed a strong sense of self and be able to feel good ...
Views: 241 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Struggle To Be Loved By A Woman If His Mother Was Unable To Love Him? - by Submitted on Oct 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperRight now, a man could be in a relationship with a woman who is not really interested in him. Or, if he is not in a relationship with a woman like this, he could be dating or seeing a woman who is. Consequently, he is going to be into or really into her but she is not going to feel the same ...
Views: 241 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother-Enmeshed Man Engaging In A Struggle For Love? - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he is seldom there for himself and spends a lot of time doing things for his mother, he is going to be depriving himself of what he needs. Based on how he behaves, it will be as though he doesn’t have many needs. However, although this is something that may ...
Views: 241 - Anger Problems: Can A Man Use Anger To Mask His Hurt? - by Submitted on Nov 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for a man to feel angry and this could be something that the people in his life are only too aware of. The reason for this is that he could often come across as intense and rude. It might go further, though, as there could be moments when he is violent and destroys ...
Views: 240 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Have The Need To Always Be On The Go If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Oct 07, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to spend most of their waking hours on the go. So, from morning until night, they are seldom going to just be, and, even if they were to sit down, they might not be able to simply relax. To settle themselves down, they might need to have something to drink or ...
Views: 240 - Child Abuse: Why Would Someone Have Been Treated As Though They Were Nothing By Their Abusive Parent? - by Submitted on May 13, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may see, if they were to step back and reflect on their early years, is that they were often treated as though they had no value and were worthless. So, they might have often been physically harmed and verbally put down and largely been deprived of the emotional nutrients that they ...
Views: 240 - Emotional Self: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their Emotional Self? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they are typically out of touch with how they feel, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of this. But, if this is how they how been for quite some time, there will be no reason for it to stand out. And, as they are likely to live in a society that is full ...
Views: 240 - Shadow Side: Does Someone Incarnate With A Shadow Side? - by Submitted on Aug 02, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperThere are those who had a childhood that was very nurturing and then there are those that didn’t. Along with this, there are those that had a childhood that was in the middle; neither very nurturing nor overly depriving. When it comes to someone who had a very loving childhood, it can seem as ...
Views: 240 - Child Abuse: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Feel Deeply Vulnerable? - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to spend a lot of time by themselves, away from others. When they are by themselves, they could typically feel comfortable and at ease. This can also be a time when they will be connected to what is taking place inside them, too. When they are around others, ...
Views: 239 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Carry A Lot Of Hurt If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone can be carrying a lot of pain, it doesn’t mean that they will realise this. The reason for this is that their brain can generally keep this pain out of their conscious awareness. Along with this, there can be a number of things that they will do, secondary defences, to keep ...
Views: 239 - Emotionally Empty: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone Look Towards People, Places And Things To Feel Whole? - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone can feel emotionally empty, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. But, what they can be aware of is their need to attain, achieve and experience different things. They can then be someone who describes themselves as driven and this could be how a number ...
Views: 239 - Needs: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Believe That Their Needs Won’t Be Met? - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone will have a number of needs, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of all of them. As a result of this, it is not going to be possible for them to meet all their needs. By living in this way, they are going to be depriving themselves of a lot of what they need. They can ...
Views: 239 - Self-Rejection: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Reject Themselves? - by Submitted on May 28, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to be there for others and to ignore a number of their own needs and feelings. But, although they will have abandoned themselves, it doesn’t mean that this will stand out. However, even if what is going on doesn’t stand out, living in this way is still going ...
Views: 239 - Self-Worth: Can Someone’s Worth Be Externalised If They Experienced Conditional Love As A Child? - by Submitted on Nov 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperSomeone could spend a lot of time doing things and very little if any time relaxing and taking it easy. This could be how they have been for most of their life, though, so it might not be something that stands out. Nonetheless, if they live in a society that is generally focused on the doing ...
Views: 239 - Happiness: Can Someone Feel Guilty For Being Happy If They Grew Up With A Depressed Parent? - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone feels happy, they could soon feel uncomfortable and their inner state could change thereafter. This could be something that is the rule as opposed to the exception. But, if this is something that is normal, it might not be something that stands out. As a result of this, they are ...
Views: 238 - Human Doing: Can Early Deprivation Turn Someone Into A Human Doing? - by Submitted on Feb 06, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIt is part of the human experience for someone to spend time asleep and time awake. One way of looking at this would be to say that they will then spend part of their life being and part of their life doing. At the same time, this wouldn’t be completely accurate as there will need to be ...
Views: 238 - Loss: Can Early Deprivation Make It Harder For Someone To Handle Loss? - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter someone has experienced a breakup, lost a loved one, or had a pet pass on, for instance, they could end up embracing how they feel and allowing themselves to grieve. This is then likely to be a time when they won’t behave as they usually would. So, they might no longer have the desire ...
Views: 238 - Mother Wounds: Can A Fear Of Abandonment Cause A Man To Be A ‘Nice Guy’? - by Submitted on Jul 07, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIn general, a man could be easy-going, needless and do his best to please others. He is then rarely if ever going to assert himself, express his needs or disagree with what another person says. But, although how he comes across won’t be a reflection of who he really is; he could believe that ...
Views: 238 - Early Deprivation: Can Someone Feel Invisible If They Had A Narcissistic Parent? - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone will exist and, thus, will be able to be seen and heard by others, it doesn’t mean that they will typically feel seen and heard. If they were to think about how they generally experience life, it could be as if they are not real. When they are around others, then, it could ...
Views: 237 - Early Deprivation: What Can Happen If Someone Grew Up In A Family That Was Physically Close But Emotionally Distant? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to look back on their early years, what could soon stand out is that they grew up in a family that was very close. Therefore, if it was put forward to them that they were neglected, they are likely to dismiss what is said. They could say that this is not true as their family ...
Views: 237 - Inner Security: Can Early Deprivation Stop Someone From Developing Inner Security? - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to feel all at sea internally or to be in a shut down state and unable to feel anything. Experiencing life in this way is likely to make it hard for them to appreciate their time on this planet. Due to how unstable they often feel, then, their need to feel ...
Views: 237 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Would A Woman See A Mother-Enmeshed Man As The Problem? - by Submitted on Feb 25, 2024 from Oliver JR CooperIf a woman is with a man who is overly focused on his mother and is out of reach emotionally, she is likely to wonder why she is even with him. Ultimately, he won’t have much time for her and even when he is around, he is unlikely to be very present. Based on how he behaves, it will be clear ...
Views: 237 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone’s Brain Make It Hard For Them To Realise That They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Apr 02, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt the beginning of someone’s life, they might have been deeply traumatised, but, now that they are an adult, they might not be aware of this. This stage of their life could be a complete mystery to them, or they could say that it wasn’t that bad, for instance. However, even if this stage of ...
Views: 236 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To See His Mother As Just Another Person? - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhile a man whose whole life practically revolves around his mother is likely to have other family members, these people are not going to receive the same amount of attention. And, even if he only has one other family member, this is still going to be the case. His mother is then going to be ...
Views: 236 - Unlovable: Can Someone Find It Hard To Accept That They Are Lovable If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Dec 21, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to step back and reflect on their relationships, what might soon stand out is that they have pushed at least one person away. They could find that this person was warm and that the relationship was going well and then, before long, it ended. Being in a relationship that was ...
Views: 236 - Breakups: Can It Be Harder For A Man To Handle A Breakup If His Mother Was Emotionally Unavailable? - by Submitted on Sep 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperNot too long ago, a man may have experienced a breakup. Then again, this might not be something that took place recently, with his relationship having ended a number of months or years ago. However, irrespective of how long ago this took place, he could now be in a very bad way and find it ...
Views: 235 - Early Deprivation: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Have A Fear Of Being Alone? - by Submitted on Jul 03, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to spend time by themselves, is that they feel deeply alone. This is then not going to be a time when they are able to enjoy their own company; it will be a time when they have a strong need to be around another or others. However, while this is something ...
Views: 235 - False Self: What Can Happen If Someone Was Brought Up To Be An Extension Of Their Parent? - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone is a separate human being, who has their own needs and feelings and life to lead, it doesn’t mean that they will act like one. What can be normal is for them to focus on others and to do what they can to please them. As a result of this, they will typically act as though ...
Views: 235 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Woman Powerless If She Continually Ends Up With Mother-Enmeshed Men? - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being with a number of men who were overly focused on their mothers, a woman could question if she will ever meet a man who is actually available. To say that she will feel pretty hopeless when it comes to this area of her life could be an understatement. But, as she has gone through ...
Views: 235 - Anxiety: Can Unmet Developmental Needs Play A Part In Why Someone Feels Anxious? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperThere are those who experience anxiety from time to time and those who more or less always feel anxious. When someone can relate to the latter, they might want to lose the ability to be anxious. This may show that they have experienced life in this for a few months or a number of years. But, ...
Views: 234 - Child Abuse: Is An Abusive Parents Lack Of Self-Awareness A Defence Against Pain? - by Submitted on May 05, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone could find, if they were to speak to the parent who mistreated them during their formative years – assuming it was only one - is that they are unable to make much headway. Based on how this parent responds, it could be as if they are talking to someone who wasn’t actually there ...
Views: 234 - Early Deprivation: Does Someone Engage In Repetition Compulsion To Avoid Their Emotional Truth? - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were able to step back and reflect on their life, is that they continually end up in situations where they feel unloved, unwanted and even invisible. Now, this could mean that they have had a number of relationships that have been anything but fulfilling. But, ...
Views: 234 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Realise That His Life Is Important? - by Submitted on Sep 07, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man’s whole life practically revolves around his mother, it is going to be clear that he has a number of beliefs that are not serving him. Most likely, these will be beliefs that are just outside of his conscious awareness. As a result of this, he won’t realise that what he believes is ...
Views: 234 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Can’t A Mother-Enmeshed Man Accept That He Is Overly Focused on His Mother? - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he spends a lot of time doing things for his mother and very little time doing things for himself, this might be something that he is aware of. Being this way will allow him to do what he needs to do to gradually change his life. This might have been something ...
Views: 234 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Wouldn’t A Woman Be Able To Accept That She Doesn’t Randomly End Up With Mother-Enmeshed Men? - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperTo have been with one man who was overly focused on his mother would have been a lot to deal with, and, therefore, if a woman has been with a number of men who were like this, it is not going to be a surprise if she is well and truly fed up. For however long, she will have wanted to be with a ...
Views: 234 - Emotional Problems: Can A Man Feel Isolated If He Has Mental And Emotional Problems? - by Submitted on Nov 18, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is not in a good way, it doesn’t mean that they will end up reaching out for the support that he needs. He might not even share what is going on for him with his friends or family, for instance. As a result of this, he could have a number of people in his life that would be happy to ...
Views: 233 - Existence: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Believe That They Don’t Deserve To Exist? - by Submitted on Mar 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to sit with themselves and was able to connect with how they really feel, what they may soon find is that they don’t feel as though they deserve to exist. As opposed to being worthy of being here, then, they will feel like an intruder. After this, they could look into why this ...
Views: 233 - False Self: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Create An Inflated False Self? - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperThere are some people that are not very confident and are full of doubt, while there are others that are full of confidence and don’t really experience doubt. Due to this, those that can relate to the former often achieve far less than those that can relate to the latter. If one was to meet ...
Views: 233 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Wouldn’t A Mother-Enmeshed Man Be Able To Face Reality? - by Submitted on Sep 21, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be hard for someone to comprehend is why a man wouldn’t be able to see that he is focused on his mother and is neglecting himself. Now, the impact that his behaviour has on them is likely to depend on the type of relationship that they have with him. Naturally, if this relates to a ...
Views: 233 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Treat Themselves Like An Object If Their Parents Treated Them Like One? - by Submitted on Dec 30, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone is a human being that has a number of needs, feelings and inherent value, it doesn’t mean that they will realise this. Instead, they could treat themselves like they are nothing more than an object that only has a few basic needs, no feelings and no value and purely exists to ...
Views: 232 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Feel Ashamed Of Their Body If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone’s body is part of them and is, therefore, not something that they can get rid of, it doesn’t mean that they have embraced it. As a result of this, they may overlook this part of them or they could do just about everything that they can to change it. What this will illustrate ...
Views: 231 - Early Deprivation: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Believe That They Are Unlovable? - by Submitted on Jun 30, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone believes that they are unlovable, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. But, even if this is not something that they are aware of, it is still going to have a big impact on their life. So, a lot of their time and energy could be spent doing things to make ...
Views: 231 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have The Need To Possess A Woman If He Had An Unavailable Mother? - by Submitted on Nov 02, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being with a man for a little while, a woman could feel as though he is too much for her to handle. This is because she could feel controlled and as if her ability to freely express herself has been taken away. However, there is a strong chance that she didn’t feel this way in the ...
Views: 231 - Mother Wounds: Did An Abusive Mothers Childhood Cause Her To See Her Child As A Burden? - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone were to look back at their early years, what might stand out is that this wasn’t a time when they were generally loved and cherished. Instead, they could see that this was a time when they were typically treated like they were nothing. This can be how their mother and perhaps ...
Views: 231 - Mother Wounds: What Can Happen If A Man Wasn’t Seen By His Mother During His Developmental Years? - by Submitted on Sep 01, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperA man might not remember a great deal about what his early years were like but that doesn’t mean that he will have truly moved on from this stage of his life. However, if this stage of his life has more or less been blocked out by his brain, he won’t be able to realise this. As a result of ...
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