Steps of effective communication to boost yourself socially

1) Look into the eyes for the person when he is talking, this gives him an assurance that you are listening
This is a good conversation skill and people who are not able to do it are considered insecure and shy.

2) The spoken to heard ratio must be less than one
If you speak less and listen more, you are understood as a listener. Leaders listen a lot and speak crisp. This may not hurt you much if you do not follow it, but it will surely give an impression to the other person that you need to talk more to get an upper hand in the conversation. Try to attain respect from the other person by listening to him completely and giving him all the time he needs to complete his part. Sometimes there are people who just need to talk and talk, there are tricks to get out of the conversation. Keep the ratio as less as possible, but listen all. Take your eyes down sometimes while listening. Compliment and agree excessively and satisfy him, so that he is happy to end the conversation sooner than expected. It is as giving him what he wants a lot quicker and avoid further discussions. There are people who will just come to talk and keep talking if you have a good personality and a peaceful nature.

3) Do not be monotonous in your speech
Vary your tempo and volume often to give an impressive speech. Do ot overdo it, and remember, do not vary it in between the sections. Let me explain,
"You can very well judge a person by his speech, but the point is, if 'you' can have the ability to infer correctly or not..."
Now in this sentence you can vary your tempo and volume in three sections ie; between the commas. The highlighted word
'you' is to be stressed to be imposed powerfully, As the conversation is about the 'you' concerned.

4) There should be no blank spaces in the conversation.
The tempo of the conversation is to be made smooth. There should be no lags between the speeches. It is just like
maintaining a rhythm between the two speakers. If one stops other one continues and vice versa. The parts of the
speeches should be supplementary or complimentary to each other, there should not be abrupt topic changes if it is a
formal discussion. When you change the topic make sure the other person is finished too.

5) Speak confidently
It is confidant that makes you win discussions and debates, either be confidant of what you say ( truly or falsely ) or just keep quiet.

6) compliments
a) Everybody likes being appreciated, this is the quickest way to someones heart. Appreciate with your heart and never restrain yourself of doing so. Give true compliments and use your heart more than your mind.
b) Anything is taken well when it is camouflaged as a compliment
You can say anything and really anything as long as it sounds like a compliment, you are likely to get a thanks back too. The world is crazy, every one likes to be appreciated at any cost. Many things can be ugly otherwise, but if they are given as a compliment or accompanied by a compliment, are usually taken well. Start with compliment and use phrases like 'but', 'it would rather be better if', 'still...', 'I suggest you...', 'don't mind but...'.

7) Be humble and respectful no matter what the temperature of the conversation may be, coz some one else may be judging you
If you are in a hot debate with some one, and the temperature is rising... try to keep your cool. Try not to make it a dog fight to the viewers. No matter who is right or wrong, in a debate, the impression of a person is just felt by the calm and composed communication. You need not be in the same tone as the other person is, maintain your uniqueness.

8) A question should never be answered with a question
This is a very wrong habit to have, it is just as if you are bouncing the ball back which is meant to be caught. You put an end to a conversation with it. many questions do not have a sense and are just meant to start a conversation. These questions are usually most irrelevant and the person asking the question, usually knows the reply. questions like;
If you are ready to go to bed, and someone asks, "Are you going to bed?"
Wrong reply- "What do I look like?" or "Do I look like planning for a meeting?"
Right answer- "Ya I feel sleepy.... "
If you still like to answer in the same sense then atleast give the answer correctly and add you question later
" Ya I feel sleepy, I am going to bed... , did it feel like I had a meeting or something?"
This way you cared to answer and still gave a taunt, the person is satisfied with the answer and you are satisfied with the taunt.

9) When trying to explain your point or saying something important, keep your tempo low and voice deep
This puts a psychological effect on the person hearing your point and the information is well absorbed by the listener. Usually as the person is waiting for you to finish, it makes him to concentrate more on what you are saying in order to look for an end to your speech. Tease him and he won't even notice and your purpose is solved too.

10) If the other person is trying too hard to put his point or rather say bullying you
wait for the moment and thrash him when you have the perfect moment, remember do not hurry. If he is climbing a wrong mountain, just don't stop him rather enjoy watching... there will be just two things
a) He finds that he is on the wrong path by himself, comes back down by himself.
b) He keeps on climbing without seeing anything and finally reaches the top, now he would notice that he is at the top of the fool's mountain or you may give him a hint.
Enjoy such kind of conversations this way only, don't try to pull him back, give a chance to prove himself... It doesn't matter.

In the end... ---Smile---Speak---Confidence---Compliment---

Author's Bio: 

Author is a young guy deciphering life @ http://www.DecipheringLife.com