Reach Out and Touch Someone

Busyness has become a way of life for too many people, especially women. We are constantly running the daily details of the home, organizing schedules, stretching the budget, straining to make ends meet, trying to be everything to everyone, and sleeping less than we should. We have too much to do with too little time in which to do it. Maybe it's time we all take a deep breath and ask ourselves: WHAT am I so busy with? WHY am I doing it? And for WHOM?

Has your life become inundated with repetitive daily routines that leave you always very busy, but frightfully unfulfilled? When I look down into the well of my life, it has come up dry, dull and dismal. Having no energy with each dreary day accumulating into weeks of doldrums is not how I wanted to fill the days of my life. I know I deserve more but couldn't figure out how to achieve it.

Slouching on our living room couch, I expressed my dilemma to my 20-year old son. He patiently listened as I rambled on about how I was so busy but also filled with so much nothingness. It felt like my life didn't much matter these days and the future looked equally dismal. I'm not sure where wisdom comes from but on that day my sensitive son waited for a quiet moment and then with absolute sincerity said, "Mom, have you been with any of your girlfriends lately?" His comment caught me off guard. My first thought was, "What does that have to do with anything?" But instead I answered, "No, not really. I guess." He respectfully and wisely gave me the assignment to call one of my long, lost girlfriends before the end of the day.

Reluctantly, but not wanting to disappoint my son, I called one dear friend, whom I had not seen in months, and asked her to go for a walk with me that afternoon. As we briskly walked my usual two-mile route, our conversation solved all the world's problems. But we came up desperately short when it came to solving her present need: how to be a single mom with nine children to raise and have enough money to pay the rent.
My weariness combined with her neediness produced an idea we knew was a perfect solution to some of our problems. I offered to host a yard sale in our front yard and would contribute my piles, my energy and my garage to the project. We enthusiastically planned the project together and relished the thought of cleaned closets, sorted drawers, and rent being paid on time. We shared a refreshing drink of water as we selected a yard sale date and my friend went on her way encouraged about our new plans. I took a deep breath and another girlfriend's name popped into my head.

One phone call can change your life's perspective, as well as that of your girlfriend's. My friend's world had just crashed all around her - this very day. Her boys were being kicked out of school and she had just found porn on her husband's computer. Devastated, we both sat with our phones to our ears, crying our hearts out as we tried to make sense of this life that had been handed to us. Life can appear so dark at times and yet, as I shared with her my own daily struggle with my son being in prison and the temptations my husband has battled for years we could both see 'light' at the end of the tunnel. No, our immediate problems were not solved, but as we carried one another's burdens we witnessed the overwhelming fear of the future dissipate into seeming hope.

Supporting each other, we felt like comrades on the same battlefield. Battle-weary mamas linked arm in arm. We were one another's reinforcement. We promised to meet each other once a week at a nearby park, so the children could play and we could gently smear salve on one another's wounds. I knew in my heart there would be better days ahead. I also felt the energizing power of reaching into another's heart and sensing the filling of my own.

A look at the calendar reminded me of a long lost friend's birthday and so I sorted through my scrap booking pile and found just the perfect colors and images to suit her tastes. As I creatively put together a customized birthday card, I thought of memories we had shared so long ago. Precious moments when days seemed rich with meaning. Yes, they were the days of diapers, baby bottles and sleepless nights - but they were also the days of giggles and new adventures. I smiled as I thought about how "young" life seemed then. As I wrote a personal note of tender words inside the finished card, I pondered all the personalized cards and letters I have received from friends and family over the years. Funny verses, joyful pictures, crayon filled images, $5 bills, pressed flowers and hand written words that span the years with encouragement, enrichment, refreshment and reinforcement. My life has truly been touched by so many friends!

As the day crept away from me and I crawled into bed that night I realized my son's wise comment had actually been the secret to brightening my dull world. The old T.V. commercial rang in my mind, "Reach out and touch someone..." I began to think of ideas to pursue. Volunteer to babysit for a young mother expecting her third child; take fresh-cut roses from the garden to that friend in the hospital; rake the elderly neighbor's yard; invite a couple of single college girls from church or the local college for Sunday dinner; give extra tomatoes from the garden to brighten someone's meal; gather clothing the children have outgrown and give them to a single mom.

The list was endless as my mind raced with ideas. To truly reach out and touch someone else's life causes a phenomenon unlike any other. To take our own miserable attitude and set aside just enough self to enter into someone else's world causes a domino effect. Giving a little and getting a lot in return is considered a good investment. Maybe the old adage, "it is better to give than to receive" really does make sense! The stock market fluctuates and our nation's economy may be unsteady and seemingly out of our control. But investing in the life and happiness of another woman brings immeasurable treasures worth a lifetime! And that is a guaranteed investment we CAN control.