How you do love is how you do money?

How you do love is how you do money?

How are marriage & owning  a business the same?
 
I've noticed that some women are very good at pointing out how  their significant other could have done things better, point out their faults and punish them for perhaps not meeting your needs or supporting you when you think they should. All of this only leads to disconnects and distance in our relationships. Yelling and nagging is just disrespectful and honestly, not very effective. Expecting our spouses to do and think exactly as you do, does not and will never work.
 
However, once  you find that happy place in understanding what special things each person brings to the table, what their true gifts are and realize that we all have our quirks and faults and actually embrace these, this is when the magic and loving comfort is brought into the relationship. Where peace and endless , loving support occurs.
 
So my tip here is to quit waiting for your spouse to earn your respect. Begin acting respectful in a loving way towards him or her and eventually they will do the same back.
 
Though you may not agree on everything, you both will respect and support each other and stand up for each other at times that it is needed. What  also begins to happen, is that you allow the other person to grow when they need to, at their own pace.
 
Marriage is an ebb and flow during life. Sometimes it's exciting, sometimes it's mellow, sometimes it's challenging but as long as you always remember the reason why you fell in love with this person in the first place, are respectful and supportive, you will be at peace during the high and the low times.
 
So what does this have to do with our customers? Well, when you begin to treat your customers with respect  and allow them to grow at their own pace, give them room to actually step up to their own success, but hold them true to their own empowerment by giving a respectful, gentle push to keep them moving forward, they will achieve what they need  to within their business.
 
We can not expect our customers to "get" everything we teach. We also can't expect to be able to relate to everyone.  AND, we definitely can not do the work for our customers, we can only guide them to their own true greatness.
 
This is why it's so important to create your idea of who your perfect customer is so that you can relate to them, their problems, their goodness, their quirks, their gifts and embrace all of it, the whole package - just like you do in a marriage. Because having a thriving, growing business is all about working together and creating relationships.
 
Everyone learns differently and at their own pace, so this is the other reason I suggest teaching the same subject in many different formats, ie written, audio, video, action workbooks, etc. Another tip is to bring in other experts that really compliment your business because many times you may say something to your customer but they won't get it, but once they hear it from some one else, or in a different format - such as audio vs written, finally they will.
 
Just like in our marriages, our customers sometimes need us  to be the strong one and hold the other  up, encouraging them each and every step of the way and really help them to step into their own true empowerment.
 
Once you begin to step into your own empowerment is when you begin to blossom. You may have to challenge yourself to really stay strong and true in your own business as a coach until your client can get to the high level you are teaching. You must remember, that they have to do the work themselves and each person is accountable for their own success. You can only guide them and give them valuable information and the steps to create their own transformation.
 
You can assist in "helping" them stay accountable in a loving, firm way versus pushy, demanding and being cynical. Done by keeping their best interest in mind will help them get to exactly where they need to be.
 
As an example of this is, when you are doing a 6 month to 1 year long coaching program your clients have paid a lot of money for you to teach them whatever you have promised, but they (and you) have to remember that they still need to do the work to get there. 
 
In the beginning they are full of energy and excited (just like dating). Around month 4-5 their eyes are opened to any challenges and reality that their dream brings. This is where the work begins. Many even want to quit at this point, yes, even after they have made the big investment to get the coaching they want. Where they may have dropped the ball, is holding true to the commitment they made in the first place.
 
Another thing that can happen is this: clients will join your more extensive, high-end programs because they want to shift the responsibility of success or no success to the coach vs themselves. Which is just silly. The coach provides you the tools, guidance and support. You must do the work. Again, it's similar to all relationships, you can't blame someone else for your happiness.  If you are not happy inside, you are not going to be happy on the outside no matter what. 
 
It is up to you as their coach, to help them get over any challenges and this 4-5 month hump, and remind them  why holding true to their commitment was important in the first place.
 
Help your customer remember their bigger "why" and work through their challenges and fears until they feel invigorated and excited and empowered to do what it is they were meant to do in this life.  This time period is a huge turning point for many. Understanding your why and the reasons you wanted your own business in the first place will also help you through any challenges.  Yes, just like remembering why you married your spouse in the first place.
 
See, pretty much how you do love is how you do everything. I learned this from my mentor Kendall Summerhawk and didn't quite understand it until a couple of years later, crazy how that works!
 
You are doing your customer a disservice if you do not hold them responsible to their commitment. Done in a loving, caring and respectful way will have them thanking you in the long run for helping them get through the challenges and bumps in the road. Supporting and guiding them each step of the way will have them meeting and achieving the success they have always dreamed of. 
 
Apply these same strategies to your marriage and you will love your spouse no matter what,  you will get through the challenging times much easier, their quirks will become cute,  your love and connection together will become stronger and you will meet your life long goals together, as  a team.