Have you ever faced a big decision and felt paralyzed with fear and torn about what to do? l have worked with many clients who have been faced with wonderful new opportunities and yet they felt overwhelmed by the task of determining how to make the best decision.
Big decisions are challenging when there are many factors to consider and when all the choices have positive potential. When faced with a big complex decision, it is important to break your decision making process into manageable steps and to use all of the tools that you have available.
The 4 Steps that will Guide You to Make the Right Decision
Step 1: Goal Setting Quadrant
Each quadrant of the Body Light Wellness Wheel has strategies to guide you and decision making tools to assist you. Depending on the complexity of your decision, you may need to complete one or two quadrants or all four quadrants. From the Goal Quadrant we learn about the power of writing things down. Consciously, you have the power of your mind to use logic and to analyze your options.
Review Your Goals
First, review the goals that you have written down in the past and determine which choice brings you closer to your goals. This step alone may be the key to helping you make the correct decision.
Create a Pros and Cons List
If reviewing your goals did not give you a sense of clarity about your decision, take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. At the top in the first column, write “Pros” and in the second column write “Cons”. List out all of the Pros and Cons you can think of. Add up the number of Pros and the number of Cons. You may have 5 Pros and 3 Cons. Become aware of how the numbers of each of these columns makes you feel. If you feel relief at seeing the 5 Pros, you may have found the answer you were looking for.
Determine the Weighting Score of Your Pros and Cons List
If you feel no relief when seeing that the Pros list is larger than the Cons list and are still feeling uneasy, it is time to put a Weighting on each item on the lists. This weighting is either: 1, 2 or 3.
For the Pros, give a weighting of: For the Cons, give a weighting of:
1 – If it is a Good Pro 1 – If it is a Small Bad Con
2 – If it is a Great Pro 2 – If it is a Medium Bad Con
3 – If it is an Amazing Pro 3 – If it is a Big Bad Con
After you have weighted each item and add them up, you may discover that all of your 5 Pros have a weighting of 1, which adds up to 5. The list of the 3 Cons may show that they are all weighted at 3 and showing a total of 9. This may confirm what you knew to be true – that even through there seem to be many Pros and there are only 3 Cons, the weighting of the Cons outweighs the benefits of the Pros.
Work with a Coach
One of the most powerful ways to accomplish your goals is to work with a trusted Personal Goals Coach, who keeps you accountable to attaining your dreams. Working with a Coach can allow you to face the decision making process more objectively, help you form the list of Pro’s and Con’s, and help you assess and review the weighting of the items.
A Coach also listens and can reflect back to you what they are hearing from you. A Coach acts as a mirror to help you gain clarity of your thoughts and hopes and fears. Although some people might be tempted to simply work with a friend or a family member for this step, there are dangers to be aware of. Well meaning friends can be jealous about your opportunities (even if it is unconscious) and caring family members can be fearful of change and you leaving them (even if it is unconscious) and these can play havoc in the reflecting back process. For important decisions, it is good to work with a trusted Coach who can be objective and help you in the process of uncovering the best decision for you.
Step 2: Self Discovery Quadrant
From the Self Discovery Quadrant we learn about the power of analyzing the messages in our dreams. Perhaps you have heard the expression that “All the answers are inside of you” and yet you wonder where they might all be hiding. Your unconscious has wonderful wisdom that it tries to share with you nightly.
In the Dream Course we learn how to tap into that wisdom. When faced with a big decision, before you go to bed write your question in your journal and as you fall asleep keep repeating this question to yourself. In the morning, write your dreams down and look for potential answers that you have received.
Taking the Dream Course and working with a Dream Circle can really help you crack your own dream code so that the answers can benefit your decision making process.
Some people find it helpful to have a card reading to uncover insights into their thinking and their decision making process. Working with a trusted Card Reader and using a card deck that you feel comfortable with are the key to your success.
Step 3: Healing
From the Healing Quadrant we learn about the power of healing. When navigating the muddy waters of the decision making process, it can be a very stressful time going through the process. Stress can add unwanted adrenaline to your body and confusion to your thought process. It is important to continue to give yourself good self care.
An excellent way to reduce stress is to have a massage. For those who have experienced the gentle approach of an Energy Treatment, they know that often when the body and mind are relaxed, insights are able to easily bubble up. These insights can come from both the client and the practitioner during the treatment. Discovering your answer to your big decision is very healing.
Step 4: Yoga
From the Yoga Quadrant we learn about the power of exercise. Going for a long run, walk or rollerblade, playing an intense game of squash or tennis, doing an invigorating yoga class, are all great ways to clear your mind.
By engaging in exercise, you reduce the stress in your body and increase your endorphins. During your workout, focus on the task at hand and let go of the angst around your decision making process. At the end of your workout, your mind will feel clearer and you may also receive an insight about your decision.
By following the wisdom contained in the Body Light Wellness Wheel, you will be able to make the best decisions that you can. If you are faced with a decision and would like help, please feel free to contact us at www.BodyLightYoga.com
Janet Williams is a Certified Primary-Junior Teacher and Yoga Instructor. Her diverse experiences have provided her with insights designed to teach and assist others in their exciting journey of self-discovery. Janet is the owner of Body Light™, which focuses on physical and mental wellness. The unique Body Light™ Wellness System utilizes the power of Yoga, Goal Setting, Healing and Self Discovery to promote health. Janet’s new children’s yoga book “What I See, I Can Be” is focused on helping parents and teachers provide a safe, age appropriate and fun work out.
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