If there is one single skill required for self-evolution and for the creation of a better reality for the whole planet, it is the skill of self-love. This is the capacity to unconditionally, and actively, care for and accept who you are no matter what the challenges.

Imagine how community health would improve if everyone took responsibility for their bodies. Imagine how emotionally safe your world would be if everyone cleared their fear and anger. Truth would more easily flourish if every one of us faced and released the illusions born of self-righteousness. These are the acts of a self-loving person.

There are many ideas, definitions and attitudes about self-love in the literature on spiritual growth. Unfortunately, self-love is too often equated selfishness or the pride of the negative ego. However, as I define it, self-love of the foundation principle for allowing the spiritual aspects of a person to find a nest within life on earth.

The soul needs to have a safe and caring human home in which its expression can be supported and nourished. What value is the love of the higher self and spirit if your personality self will not accept your right to care for yourself? And this is particularly true in times of transition such as we are experiencing on the planet right now. The safety provided by self-love is essential to protect a person or a group from the hazards of rapid change.

Self-loving acts do not rely upon expensive purchases, time-consuming activities, or once-a-year holidays. Contrary to common assumption, self love does not exclude loving others. In fact, self-love improves the ability to love others for if you do not care for yourself, how can you can you be in a position to care for others? A pauper has nothing to give others.

Self-love is not achieved by applying other people’s solutions to your own situation. The self is unique and the application of self-love to your life is also unique. Self-love is an attitude of caring for the self that seeks to discover what might in the moment bring about a greater sense of safety and well being.

The door to the self-love is opened by asking these two questions:

1. In this moment, am I responding to myself and my life in such a way that I am gaining, regaining or sustaining a sense of well-being?

2. Am I actually caring for myself mentally, emotionally, physically and energetically?”

And where the answer is, no, authentic self-love means that you will act to improve your well-being.

Begin the active self-love process by honest observation of how you are treating yourself. Are you telling yourself what a fool you are for having allowed this or that to happen to you? Are you beating yourself up for feeling angry and disappointed? On the other hand, are you self-righteously wallowing in negativity, denying reality, and avoiding using those techniques and skills that would allow that discomfort to release? Apart from clearing and cleansing, are you giving yourself opportunities for comfort, growth, pleasure and a joyful participation in life?

Maybe when you will look at yourself you will be shocked at your current lack of self-love. If that is so, don’t continue your habits of lack of self-love by falling into a panic about the enormity of your problems: that will be your negative ego telling you how hopeless life is.

Begin the change by adopting an attitude to yourself that you would have towards a loved child. Be kind, reassuring and practical. Calm your fears, avoid self-punishment and stop procrastinating on those inner or outer actions that would help you to gradually bring more pleasure, safety and freedom to your life.

Author's Bio: 

Suzie St George is executive director of the Reach Potential Learning Centre for Heart-Connected Success. She conducts online mentoring and workshops for those who wish to learn how to utilise brain-change techniques to align physicality with the core soul potential. You can download a free e-book on Mastering the Art of Change from http://www.reachpotential.com.au