"When I lose my temper, I find it difficult to forgive myself. I feel I've failed. [But] I can be calm in a crisis or in the face of death... which may be masochistic of me." - Emma Thompson

Many of us relate to this quote. We have endless compassion and forgiveness for others, but we cannot forgive ourselves. Many of us, even we are surrounded by good things, we replace smiles with doubt or self-sabotage? Many of us do this because we have a core belief system that is negative. Our core doubts and beliefs can be learned or they can be karmic in nature. The first step to removing negative core beliefs is to recognize them. So, if you are truly ready to live the life you choose, balancing all 7 aspects of wellness, and to radiate happiness, complete the following exercise to identify your roadblocks and core beliefs.

Exercise: Identify Your Roadblocks

Take a look at this list of common automatic thoughts. On a piece of paper, jot down the common roadblocks that sound familiar to you. Some will resonate strongly, while you’ll feel a vague connection to others without knowing exactly why. If there’s a spark of recognition when you read it, write it down.

  • “I’ll be embarrassed.”
  • “I must be an awful person for this to have happened to me.”
  • “I’m going nowhere.”
  • “People only pretend to like me.”
  • “I’m going to get hurt.”
  • “But it’s not perfect.”
  • “This is hopeless.”
  • “This is too complicated for me to learn.”
  • “This isn’t going to work.”
  • “People always do that to me.”
  • “Nothing can help me.”
  • “I’m going to be bored.”
  • “I’m doomed to always be this way.”

Now that you’ve written down a few, do any others come to mind? Write those down as well.

What about core beliefs? They aren’t always immediately apparent; in fact, they can be pretty tricky to identify. Let’s just take a quick look at some common core beliefs. Write down any of these that sound familiar, and if you think of any others, write those down, too.

  • “I am worthless.”
  • “I am unlovable.”
  • “I am incapable.”
  • “I am a failure.”
  • “I have to be perfect.”
  • “It is not okay to make a mistake.”
  • “There is something wrong with me. I am flawed.”
  • “Other people will always let me down.”
  • “The worst thing always happens.”
  • “There’s no point to anything.”

It can be sobering and even disturbing to see your automatic thoughts and core beliefs on paper. But think of these as assets. Once you know what they are and where they come from, you have the power to change them. You’re on your way!

Eventually, the work will be to shift these beliefs to fit the type of life you want to lead, but first you need to simply sit in recognition of how these core beliefs have affected your life. Where do you think they came from? What would it take to get rid of them. You are on your way to freedom the second you go inside to inspect yourself.

Author's Bio: 

Jessica Rhodes is a certified wellness adviser for the 123 Feel Better Company. The 123 Feel Better® Life Change System™ is a wellness program designed to help individuals reach their wellness goals and live fuller, more complete lives. 123 Feel Better is based on the 7 Aspects of Wellness™ model. Learn how to make real changes in the areas of Emotional, Physical, Spiritual, Environmental, Occupational, Social, and Intellectual Wellness to create a balanced life with 123 Feel Better and our free wellness resources at 123 Feel Better.