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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- Rage: Can A Man Carry A Lot Of Repressed Rage If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on Dec 22, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man may carry a lot of rage, this might not be something that he is consciously aware of. But, even if this is the case, it doesn’t mean that this won’t have an effect on how he experiences life. There is a strong chance that he will spend a lot of time in a collapsed physical ...
Views: 262 - Isolation: Can Someone Have The Need To Isolate Themselves If They Had Intrusive Parents? - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they typically need to be by themselves in order to feel settled and at ease. Along with this, this can be when they generally experience a sense of freedom and are able to be themselves. On the other hand, ...
Views: 261 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Expect To Be Treated Badly By Women If He Had A Cruel Mother? - by Submitted on May 28, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperOver the years, a man may have had a number of experiences with women that were anything but pleasant. This can mean that he has been in a number of relationships that greatly undermined him. Additionally, there can be all the interactions that he has had, both at work and in his everyday ...
Views: 261 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have The Need To Hide His Feelings If He Had An Emotionally Unavailable Mother? - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man was to take a step back and reflect on how he typically behaves, he could see that he has the tendency to hide how he feels. As a result of this, most if not all of the people in his life are not going to know what is really going on for him. This is going to mean that he will keep a ...
Views: 261 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Reject Love If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on Nov 14, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being in a position where he has wanted to be in an intimate relationship and to be loved for a little while, a man could end up sabotaging the very thing that he has wanted for all this time. Still, this is not to say that this is something that he will be consciously aware of. The ...
Views: 261 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Feel Like His Partners Possession? - by Submitted on Feb 19, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperDuring the beginning of a relationship, a man can look forward to spending time with his partner. So, when he is not with her, he can spend a fair amount of time thinking about her and the moments that they have shared and will share in the future. This will be a time when he experiences ...
Views: 261 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Woman Attract Mother-Enmeshed Men If She Has An Underdeveloped Feminine Aspect? - by Submitted on Jun 27, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being with a man who is overly focused on his mother for however long, a woman could be pretty fed up and feel drained. There can be a number of reasons as to why she is this way. First, there will be the fact she is sharing him with his mother, and, second, she is likely to be the one ...
Views: 261 - Self-Pathologizing: Can Someone Pathologize Themselves If They Have Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they are finding it hard to handle life, they could believe that there is something inherently wrong with them. They could often see themselves as useless, incapable and even stupid. Unlike perhaps the people in their life, who have it together or at the very ...
Views: 261 - Emasculation: Can A Man Be Emasculated By A Woman? - by Submitted on Jan 14, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a relationship with a woman who is undermining him, he could have at least one friend who finds it hard to accept why he doesn’t cut his ties with her. Over the days, weeks and perhaps months that he has been with her, this friend might have had a number of conversations with ...
Views: 260 - Emotionally Shut Down: Can Someone Pathologize Themselves If They Are Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Feb 16, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter someone has become aware of the fact that they are not connected to their feelings or are rarely connected to them, they might end up criticising themselves. They could even end up believing that there is something inherently wrong with them. If so, this is not going to be a time when ...
Views: 260 - False Self: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Have The Need To Adapt To Others? - by Submitted on Dec 25, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone went on a drive and a road was closed, they would need to change their route. As frustrating as this may be, it would be a minor inconvenience and it would, ultimately, allow them to reach their destination. This is then an example of someone adapting to a situation and, at the ...
Views: 260 - Father Wounds: Can Man Have The Need To Be Rescued If His Father Was Emotionally Unavailable? - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man will be an adult, it doesn’t mean that he will typically feel strong and capable. Instead, he could typically feel weak and incapable, which is likely to mean that his life will often be too much for him to handle. In general, it could be as though his circumstances are ...
Views: 260 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Does A Man Need To Realise That His Mother Can Handle Life Without Him? - by Submitted on Jun 05, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFor as long as a man can remember, he may see that he has been focused on his mother and done his best to meet her needs. Thanks to how normal this has been, it will have taken a while for him to see how out of balance he is. He may have been this way for twenty, thirty, forty or fifty years, ...
Views: 260 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Be Drawn To Women Who Are Abusive If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on May 12, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperOver the years, a man may have been with a number of women who were anything but loving. When he was with these women, he might have often been verbally put down, emotionally deprived and even physically harmed. Thanks to this, he might not have a strong desire to be in another relationship. ...
Views: 260 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Redefine Himself? - by Submitted on Nov 22, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man has spent most if not all of his life focusing on and doing things for his mother, he is unlikely to have a very empowering view of himself. Even so, this doesn’t mean that he will be aware of this. But, if he has been this way for a very long time, why would he be aware of this? How ...
Views: 260 - Passivity: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Be Passive? - by Submitted on Jan 01, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone could find is that they often lack energy and find it hard to do things. In general, they might only leave their home when they have to go to work and need food. Along with this, they could go out to see friends, watch TV and they may exercise every now and then. But, even when ...
Views: 260 - Being Seen: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Believe That They Don’t Deserve To Be Seen? - by Submitted on Feb 12, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAs someone is an interdependent human being, it will be important for them to have relationships where they are seen and heard. When this takes place, not only will their physical self be seen but their inner world will also be seen. This will take place by them opening up about how they ...
Views: 259 - Child Abuse: Can An Abusive Parent Be Too Wounded To Acknowledge That They Were Abusive? - by Submitted on Mar 26, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may hope, if they were abused as a child, is that their parent or parents will validate what they went through. This will then be a time when one or both of their parents will be able to both hear what they say and express remorse. But, what they may soon find is that this ...
Views: 259 - Child Abuse: Is An Abusive Parents Inability To Acknowledge Their Abusive Behaviour A Sign Of How Damaged They Are? - by Submitted on May 10, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter suffering for many, many years, someone may have come to see that they were mistreated during their formative years. Therefore, it is not that they were born this way and/or simply can’t get it together. No, it is that they were deprived of the love that they needed in order to grow and ...
Views: 259 - Emotional Collapse: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Be In An Emotionally Collapsed State? - by Submitted on Aug 09, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperThere are going to be moments when someone needs to be in an active state and moments when they will need to be in a passive state. They are, after all, not a tree and neither are they a machine. If they were more or less always in doing mode, they are likely to end up being burnt out before ...
Views: 259 - Invisible: Can Someone Feel Invisible If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Feb 05, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone finds it hard to be seen and they were to share this, another person might find it hard to understand. They could say that they can see them, so there is no way that this could be an issue for them. However, being physically seen is unlikely to be the real issue; what they will ...
Views: 259 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Carry A Lot Of Hurt If He Had An Emotionally Unavailable Mother? - by Submitted on Feb 08, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for a man to be out of touch with how he feels and to be in a collapsed physical state. Due to this, he can typically go through the motions in life, not feeling alive or as though his life has much meaning. But, if he has been this way for a very long time, he might not ...
Views: 259 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Would A Mother Enmeshed Man Feel Bad When He Doesn’t Focus On His Mother? - by Submitted on Jan 03, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter a man has come to see that he is overly focused on his mother and her needs, he could wonder what is going on. Also, what could soon stand out is that he has been this way for as long as he can remember. He will see that he has his own life to live and needs to meet but he will have ...
Views: 259 - Will: Can Someone Have A Weak Will If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Mar 05, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for someone to have a fulfilling life, they will need to be able to assert themselves and to go after what it is that they desire. The reason for this is that if they are unable to do this, they won’t be able to live a life that is in alignment with who they are and what they desire ...
Views: 259 - Working Through Emotional Pain Is A Lot Like Weeding A Garden - by Submitted on Aug 07, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperEarlier on, it occurred to me that when it comes to working through emotional wounds, it is very similar to weeding a garden. At this point, you might wonder how the former has got anything to do with the latter. Perhaps the reason why I was able to see this connection is that I have removed ...
Views: 259 - Depression: Why Would Someone Be Depressed Even Though They Have A Good Life? - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt this point in time, someone could find it hard to understand why they are experiencing life in a certain way. Based on the life that they lead, they can believe that they shouldn’t be the way that they are. The reason for this is that their life could be good in so many ways and yet they ...
Views: 258 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Be Highly Motivated If He Had An Emotionally Unavailable Father? - by Submitted on May 03, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is highly driven, he could often be seen as someone that has high self-esteem. Along with all the things that he has achieved, then, can be all of the positive feedback that he receives from others. However, although he may have high self-esteem, it doesn’t mean that he is being ...
Views: 258 - Fight Instinct: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Lose Touch With Their Fight Instinct? - by Submitted on Sep 24, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for someone to both survive and thrive, it will be essential for them to have the ability to stand up for themselves and make it clear when something isn’t acceptable. This will allow them to protect their physical, mental and emotional self. There will be moments when they will need ...
Views: 258 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Would a Mother Enmeshed Man Have Trouble Identifying His Needs And Feelings? - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperEven though a man will have his own needs and feelings, he could generally be out of touch with what is taking place within him. These parts, along with his desires and preferences, will be connected to his true self. Thus, if he is out of touch with what is going on within him and is ...
Views: 258 - Pedestalization: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Put Others On A Pedestal? - by Submitted on Sep 24, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was able to step back and reflect on their life, what they may find is that they have the tendency to elevate others. As a result of this, seeing another person as more knowing, more powerful and more capable will be normal. They are then going to be at one level and the average ...
Views: 258 - Survival: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Feel As Though Their Survival Is Constantly Under Threat? - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone can live a life where they often feel as though they are going to die, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. However, if they are not aware of this, they are still likely to suffer. What can be normal is for them to experience a lot of anxiety and ...
Views: 258 - True Self: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone’s True Self To Go Into Hiding? - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone is connected to their true self, they will be aware of their needs and feelings. This will mean that they will be in touch with their body as this will be where most of their needs and feelings will be found. By having this connection, they will be able to live a life that is in ...
Views: 258 - Depression: Can Shame Stop A Man From Being Able To Admit That He Is Depressed? - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is depressed, it doesn’t mean that he will be able to fully accept this. He can then do just about everything that he can to hide what is really on for him from both himself and others. One of the ways that he can do this is by more or less always being on the go and being focused on ...
Views: 257 - Early Deprivation: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Have A Dysfunctional Relationship With Their Sexual Side? - by Submitted on Dec 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen it comes to someone’s sexual side, it can be like another food that they have as part of a meal or it can be something that they have late at night. In other words, it can be something that is just part of a relationship that they are in or it can be something that they engage in with ...
Views: 257 - Emotional Self: Can Someone Be Out Of Touch With Their Emotional Self If Their Parents Were Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNow that someone is an adult, what they might notice is that they don’t have a strong connection with their feelings. In general, they might not know how they feel and be in a disconnected state. But, even if they do experience a feeling or a number of feelings, it doesn’t mean that they will ...
Views: 257 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Could A Mother-Enmeshed Man Live His Own Life If His Mother Wanted Him To? - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFrom the outside, it can seem as though a mother enmeshed man just needs to stop focusing on his mother’s life and to focus on his own. By doing this, he will be able to slowly transform his life and live a life that is worth living. With this in mind, it will be up to him to draw the line ...
Views: 257 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have A Strong Need To Be Seen By Women If He Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperA man could put a lot of effort into his appearance, with this being a way for him to receive a woman’s attention. This can mean that he spends a lot of time exercising, a lot of his money on clothes and is often at bars and clubs. When he receives attention from a woman who he finds ...
Views: 257 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: What Would A Mother-Enmeshed Man Find It Hard To Say No To His Mother? - by Submitted on May 31, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIt has been said that someone’s yes will only mean something if they also have the ability to say no. The reason for this is if they are unable to say no, they will say yes out of their need to please another person. On the other hand, if they felt comfortable saying no, they would be able to ...
Views: 257 - True Self: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone’s True Self To Withdraw? - by Submitted on Apr 16, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone doesn’t have a strong connection with their true self, it is going to mean that they are rarely going to be aware of how they feel and a number of their needs will typically be a mystery. In general, then, they are going to live in their head and be out of touch with their ...
Views: 257 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Feel Guilty For Putting Their Needs First If They Were Brought Up By A Self-Absorbed Parent? - by Submitted on Mar 29, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperHaving needs is part of the human experience but that doesn’t mean that everyone feels comfortable with their needs. When someone is in this position, it is likely to be normal for them to overlook their own needs. In fact, they might not even be aware of most of their needs and so they are ...
Views: 256 - Mother Enmeshed Man: Why Would a Mother Enmeshed Man Have Trouble Expressing His Needs And Feelings? - by Submitted on Jun 09, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough having needs and feelings is part of the human experience, it doesn’t mean that a man will feel comfortable with them. As a result of this, it could be normal for him to overlook them. There can be moments when this is something that he is aware of and moments when this is something ...
Views: 256 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Feel Unsafe Around Women If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on Jun 12, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIn general, a man may find it hard to feel at ease when he is around women. Due to this, he could often act in a very submissive and easy-going manner when he is around them. What this will mean is that who he is will rarely if ever show up when he is in the company of a woman. Instead, a ...
Views: 256 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can It Be Harder For A Mother-Enmeshed Man To Liberate Himself If He Is In Doing Mode? - by Submitted on Dec 01, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter a man, who is emotionally entangled with his mother, comes to see what is going on, he could end up having the need to change his life. Before this takes place, though, he could feel deeply frustrated and totally helpless. However, after a while, assuming that this doesn’t take place ...
Views: 256 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Has A Woman Unconsciously Recreated Her Childhood If She Has Ended Up With A Mother-Enmeshed Man? - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being with a man who is overly focused on his mother for however long, a woman could be well and truly fed up. Still, a part of her could hope that he will change before long and they will finally be able to have a real relationship. Yet, based on how he has behaved and is behaving, ...
Views: 256 - Being Seen: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Associate Being Seen With Being Humiliated? - by Submitted on Sep 18, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone will have the need to be seen, it doesn’t mean that they will feel comfortable being seen. This might be something that they are not consciously aware of or this might not be the case. If this is something that they are not consciously aware of, they could often feel ignored ...
Views: 255 - Child Abuse: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Be Full Of Self-Doubt? - by Submitted on Mar 27, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they find it hard to believe in themselves. By being this way, it is not going to matter if they are good at something as they won’t be able to accept it. Along with this, if they have made a plan to do ...
Views: 255 - Critical Thinking: Does Repression Allow Human Beings To Lose Touch With Their Own ‘Darkness?’ - by Submitted on Apr 03, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone has watched many films over the years and even if they rarely watch films, they are likely to be familiar with the good vs. bad scenario. There will then be one person or a group of people that are good, against one person or a group of people that are ‘bad’. However, without even ...
Views: 255 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can Early Deprivation Cause A Woman To Continually End Up With Mother-Enmeshed Men? - by Submitted on Oct 09, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a woman is with a man who is overly focused on his mother, she could be totally fed up and wonder if she should cut her ties with him. She might have been with him for a few weeks, months or even a number of years. Now, this might be the first time she has been in this position or she ...
Views: 255 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Realise That He Has Rights? - by Submitted on Nov 12, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he spends a lot of time focusing on his mother’s needs and neglects his own, it can be clear to the outsider that something is not right. After all, he will be an individual with his own life to lead; he won’t be here to act as an extension of his mother or anyone ...
Views: 255 - Unwanted: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Feel Unwanted? - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone wasn’t treated like they were wanted during their formative years, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this now that they are an adult. Yet, if this is not something that they are aware of, what took place is still likely to have a big impact on how they experience ...
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