"Expats Living in Spain: Coping With Home Sickness"

by Debbie Jenkins author of 'Going Native in Murcia'
No matter how well thought out your move to Spain may have
been, there may be times when you feel a touch of home
sickness. You may miss your old friends or the speed at
which your post arrives, the theatres and shows or the
reliable electricity supply.

You may even miss the cold drizzle on a Monday morning and
the warmth of a good curry on a Friday night. Home sickness
feelings don't usually last for too long and often only
strike when you're feeling low.

Having a good strategy in place to ward them off and deal
with them if they do strike will keep you from feeling blue.

Wisdom has it that there are three common stages of
homesickness:

1. Exaltation - Everything is so new, fresh and
exciting. You're living in what amounts to an entirely new
world and every day is an adventure. This is kind of like
the natural high that occurs to holidaymakers. It usually
lasts for several weeks, or even several months in certain
cases; but unlike the tourists, you're not going back home
after soaking in a few days' worth of cultural sightseeing.

2. Frustration - Every high has to end sometime and usually
it comes down with a bump. What am I doing here instead of
going back home where I belong? I miss my friends and
family. I miss wandering round my hometown and reading
the local paper.

3. Acceptance - Well, things aren't perfect here, but things
aren't perfect anywhere. By this stage you've learned to
settle in and accept this society and your role here as it
is. It begins to feel like home sometimes. You start to make
a few friends among the locals, learn the language a bit and
adapt to the customs and social norms.

Here are some tips to help speed up the process of becoming
a happy native:

Talk About It
-------------
Don't think you're the only person feeling sad. Your
partner or neighbours may also get the blues occasionally
too. Sharing your feelings will help, and you may be able to
come up with ways to reduce them in the future.

Keep In Touch
-------------
Having a good connection with old friends and family
enables you to keep informed about their lives and will also
remind you of what you've got now.

Phone - make sure you get a good international cheap call
supplier and call home as often as your friends and family
can put up with you.

Snail Mail - the post in Spain is even slower than in
Britain and can sometimes be quite erratic. Don't feel too
heart broken if you think everyone has missed your birthday
- the hundreds of cards may just be enroute or mislaid!

Email - an infinitely more sensible and potentially more
reliable solution to keeping in touch with friends and family.
You also reduce the risk of becoming a pest as your loved
ones can respond in their own time. This solution requires
either a mobile phone device with email capability or
Internet connection.

Blog - Keeping a "web log" (online journal) of your
adventures in your new home gives you an outlet to share
your experiences and also enables your family and friends to
check in on you to see how you're doing. There are many easy
and free ways to set up a blog including keeping a diary
(with the best one each year being published) at
www.nativespain.com

Find People Like You
---------------------
Get in touch with other expats through online forums or
social events. You can find other expats, chat and make
contact at http://www.nativespain.com

Think Positive
--------------
Make a list of all the reasons you came to Spain in the
first place - make the list long and elaborate, with all the
reasons why you left your home country and all the reasons
why you chose Spain.

Really make an effort with this - include all your feelings
and thoughts, no matter how mad they might seem to someone
else. Then the next time you're feeling down, review your
list.

Get Involved in Your New Culture
--------------------------------
One of the fastest and most long lasting ways to beat the
homesickness blues is to make Murcia your home. Get involved
in the culture, the day-to-day living, the fun and fiestas.

Make friends in the ferretería and the fish shop. Gossip
with the gas man and girls in the sausage shop. It can be
tempting to only mix with other expats, especially if you're
living on a housing estate. This could be a mistake. Many
expats on the estates are only there sporadically, and
seeing them go "home" may make you feel worse. Ensure you get a
good grounding in the real Spain. Finally, if you're still
feeling unhappy, then you may need to make the decision to
return home. Don't feel bad about this - you wouldn't have
known if you didn't give it a go!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Debbie Jenkins is the co-author of "Going Native in Murcia"
and founder of http://www.NativeSpain.com a collaborative
online guide to spain written by expats for expats.
~~~~~~~~~~~

ENDS
WORDCOUNT 865

NOTES FOR EDITORS
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Photogrpahs
-------------------
Photographs of Debbie Jenkins, cover artwork or Spain
available on request: mailto:press@nativespain.com

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Review The Book
-------------------
Preview copies of "Going Native in Murcia" can be
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Email: reviews@bookshaker.com

Interview Debbie Jenkins
------------------------
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email... mailto:author@bookshaker.com