The Secrets to Being Unstoppable

The slogan “press on” has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
—Calvin Coolidge, 30th U.S. president

We all start our journey of aspirations with visions, goals, and plans. That seems to be the easy part of the journey. The question is, how do you sustain your inspirational electricity until you get to the finish line? How can you be as unstoppable as the wind? The secret is to keep asking yourself these four questions whenever you feel stuck:

• What conclusion am I making about this person, place, thing, or idea?
• Am I trying to make others fit in with my views, beliefs, and positions?
• Am I designing my environment such that it supports my goals?
• What is my commitment?

Let us look at these questions in a bit more detail.

What conclusion am I making about this person, place, thing, or idea?
As human beings, one rather automatic thing we do is judge and make conclusions about people, places, things, or ideas. An event occurs, and we draw our own conclusions about it. These conclusions then become “reality.”

A businesswoman I will call Jane told me her take on why a prospect she had been trying to contact seemed to be avoiding her: “Maybe it’s because of my race,” Jane said.

I pointed out to Jane that that was just her interpretation of what occurred. Her prospect could be away on vacation or choosing to do business with someone else because he is her boyfriend’s cousin. The fact is that people make decisions on whom to do business with for a variety of reasons, some of them as superficial as whether they are even in the mood to buy at a particular time.

The idea is to separate what occurred from one’s conclusion about what occurred, and move on.

Am I trying to defend or preserve my views, beliefs, and position about people, places, things, or ideas?
Of all the things that stop people, this is the most common obstacle. We go through life making our minds up about the people, places, things, and ideas around us—we have points of view, beliefs, and positions that we seem to have to defend or preserve, and we will challenge anyone or anything to ensure that those opinions, beliefs, and positions live on.

This is a block that stops us because we either do not want to deal with the people, places, things, or ideas that we perceive as not agreeing with us or because we chase people away when we insist on making our views and beliefs prevail.

A friend I will call John has been married for over 40 years. He lives with his wife, but they hardly talk to each other. The reason? He decided several years ago that she was not “growing” at the rate that he was and that she was not supportive of him and his business. So he set out to find evidence to prove that his opinion was right, and that became the obstacle in their relationship.

I refer to this tendency to be positional as a sneaky benefit because it lets us remain in our comfort zones—we now have an excuse to stop taking risks or reaching out to people. While we are busy “enjoying” this sneaky benefit, we might not realize that it is costing us our joy and our relationship with people. It is also costing us our growth.

The idea is to “unhook” from being positional, and move on.

Am I designing my environment such that it supports my goals?
According to psychologists who study the relationship between our physical environments and our psyches, we usually—consciously or not—choose and arrange our physical spaces to reflect our lives. Conversely, that means that we can intentionally design our environment so that it propels us toward our goals. Then we can rely less on willpower and more on supportive environments to call us into action.

You may have been to a motivational workshop and come back all psyched up, only to lose the high after a few days. Often it was because you did not design your environment to support your new perspective—you were still hanging around the same people, having the same conversations, and living in the same cluttered space, for example.

Thomas Leonard, the founder of the International Coach Federation and CoachVille, defined our environments as constituting nine elements: spiritual, mimetic (ideas, concepts, information), self, relationship, body, physical, financial, network, and nature. This expansive definition unveils many possibilities and points to the fact that we can choose the people, places, things, or ideas that inspire rather than drain us. That way, inspiration becomes something real that exists outside our heads.

What is my commitment?
One of the best ways to be unstoppable is by asking the question, what is my commitment? Often we get so caught up in the busy-ness of day-to-day life that we forget what we are committed to and why we do the things we do.

Not only is this question an effective excuse-buster, it is also very useful for making the myriad of decisions we are often confronted with.

As the parent of a four-year-old, my commitment to my son is to ensure that his formative years are spent in a secure, loving, and nurturing environment, where he has direct and constant access to at least one of his parents for part of the day. With this commitment as the backdrop, I could then decide on the kind of business I needed to have, its size, and the rate of growth that was compatible with spending a significant amount of time with my son—in other words, I had to be careful to tame the momentum of my business and not be so carried away that I lost track of my original commitment.

By the same token, if you knew what it was you were committed to in your career, business, or relationships, you would not let obstacles stop you. You would keep going.

It is time to start living the life you have imagined. See you at the finish line.

** This article is one of 101 great articles that were published in 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life. To get complete details on “101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life”, visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/greatways3.html