Developing leadership skills that children "get"

Most adults have grown up with the idea that leadership is a job, title or position, not a way of life that expresses your unique purpose in life. They think that you become a leader by your position in your job or your community and not by the daily actions you take. That is an erroneous example of leadership. The best way to teach children how to be leaders is to let them lead themselves in as much as they are capable of doing.

These early years are imperative in helping a child develop their own leader voice. As the adults we can stifle that voice, or we can give them a safe place in which they can cultivate and develop their true potential. In addition, the ever important -- modeling the behavior that you value -- even when you're alone, goes far in helping children learn leadership.

To develop leadership in a child that they truly understand, it has to be something very personal in nature that affects them directly. This can happen by giving the child some responsibility, praising the child for making choices, not being judgmental about the choices, and allowing the child to experience the consequences of the choices.

When children are in their early teens, they start expressing their leader voice a little louder -- sometimes in rebellious ways. This may be because we are either controlling them too much or we have let them have too much freedom with no responsibility or consequences. Both are equally dangerous.

As the parent or adult in the child's life our job is to ask the child the hard questions, and let them answer, so that they can teach themselves the "right" answers. Instead of giving a child all the answers, our answers, ask them what they think or feel. When the teenager insists that having pink hair is just expressing individualism, question why their best friend also has pink hair too(but watch your tone). Let the child explain their answer out loud.

Why is a powerful word that often goes unanswered.The more a child can explain why they do certain things, the more conscious they become of their personal motivations behind their actions. If it is to fit in, get attention, stand out, or make a statement, you can use this acronym to help a child critically their examine actions. I Wonder How You . . . This will lead to new dialogue that will help them and you better understand the behavior.