Is He Done With Me For Good: When He Says It's Over Does He Mean It

"Hope is the denial of reality." -Margaret Weis

Are you in a relationship and asking yourself, "Is this relationship over?" The mere fact that you are asking yourself this question is your answer. And, 99% of the time, if you are asking this question, the answer is probably a resounding, Yes!

Unless you are in a relationship with someone who is an equal partner and says they want things to work out, or more importantly actually works at working things out, then you are in for an uphill battle and you know it.

And, don't kid yourself, you know when your relationship is over; when you feel bad most of the time, when you cry more than laugh, when you are constantly fighting with no resolve, when you are the only one trying to make things work, when you second guess everything you say and do and when you start asking yourself if you should stay or go?

The problem arises when you know the answer but choose to live in denial and when wanting a relationship becomes more important than wanting happiness. If you find yourself in an unhealthy, unhappy relationship and all of the crying, screaming, pleading, praying and trying isn't changing a thing, then it's time to face reality.

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If you choose to hide your head in the sand and continue to ignore all of the signs that's fine, but don't cry because you're miserable. Remember, you chose to look the other way. But if you face this situation head on and tell yourself the truth, then you can begin to accept the fact that it's time to start working on Plan B.

It may not be what you want to do, it may not be how you've always dreamed it would be and it certainly isn't what you signed up for but it's what you've got and now you have to make some hard decisions about your life and how you want to live it going forward.

Now is the time to "get real" with yourself. Ask yourself if this is really what you've always wanted? Does this person enhance your life or make your life worse? Are you a better person for knowing them? And, if this were your son or daughter, is this the kind of relationship you hope they find some day?

So, if you are wondering, "Is your relationship over?" Love yourself enough to be honest with yourself and then dig down and find the courage to take the first step forward into your new life and some day when you're through the worst of it you will be so glad you did.

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Everybody is aware that breakups are extremely painful and difficult experiences. However, if this pain and hurt has not deterred you from winning your ex boyfriend back, then you should learn the secrets of text messaging to do so. Despite all of the tactics you have tried in the past, you can be sure that these tips are highly effective.

Secret No. 1: Avoid texting him for a while.

When winning your ex boyfriend back, one of the things you have to do is to give each other space. No matter how much you want to be with him and be back in his loving arms, you have to show him how much his absence does not affect you. That means cutting off all means of communication, including texting, just so that he doesn't feel that you're the clingy and needy type. Your desperation will work against you in this game. Don't allow yourself to lose.

Yes, you're hurting but you mustn't let him see that. Show him that you can manage without having him by your side. Because, if he sees how attached you are to him, he can use that to his advantage and toy with your feelings. Don't give him that. Don't allow him to have the upper hand.

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Secret No. 2: Flirt with his friends through text.

While you're ignoring him, focus your attention on his friends and flirt with them a little. This will let his "caveman instincts" kick in and pursue you all over again just so that no one else will have you. Toy with his jealousy. Playing games like these will help you in winning your ex boyfriend back. If you want to know if your plan is working, let your girl friends in on the plan and have them investigate if your actions have had any effect on him and if he's starting to be attracted to you all over again.

Secret No. 3: Ignore the fact that he might have someone new.

Secret No.1 does state that you have to avoid texting your ex boyfriend for a while, right? This means, you can go back to communicating with him again after a month or so. However, avoid asking about how his love life or if he's seeing anyone at the moment. Act like you don't care. Exude an air of nonchalance and simply ask him how he is. Never show him that you want him back. Your goal in winning your ex boyfriend back is to make him run after you - remember that.

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It's too late now. Mistakes have already been made and there's no time machine to go back and start over. You screwed up and you know it. If you could take it all back, you would but since you can't, you're now faced with getting your ex boyfriend to take you back when you're the reason he left.

If you've made a mistake and pushed your ex boyfriend away, the first thing you need to do is not chase him. In every relationship, you have choices. With choices come consequences.

When you know you've made bad choices, then you must accept the consequences and take full responsibility for them. Getting your boyfriend back may not be possible, but your best chance at this point is to give him space and time.

Realize he may be angry and may say mean and hurtful things toward you. Let him vent, weather the storm, and don't chase him. He needs to sort out his own emotions before there's any chance of reconciliation.

Your boyfriend may not respond to your texts or phone calls. However, it's still important to apologize. Try a handwritten letter that says something like:

"Hi Brad. I know you're upset and you have every right to be. I screwed up and I know it. I'm sorry for (fill in what you did, but be brief). I agree with and accept your decision to end the relationship and hope we can still be friends at some point."

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A hand written letter can be effective in this situation because it's unusual. No one hand writes letters anymore. He'll likely read it out of curiosity if for no other reason.

A letter like this shows you're sorry without being needy or desperate. He's expecting you to beg and plead with him to take you back, so when you approach him with a letter like this, it shifts his thinking.

Instead of only being mad, he starts to think about possibly losing you for good. He realizes if he still wants to be with you, then he can't stay mad forever because you might move on. It will shift him into deciding whether or not he wants to repair the relationship, and that's really what you need to know.

If he does, then you can move forward with working things out. If he doesn't, then you can accept it, learn from the experience, and move on.

Getting your ex boyfriend to take you back will take time. Once you've apologized, it becomes a waiting game. Don't keep apologizing over and over. It's much better to focus your energy on thinking of ways to fix the situation rather than repeatedly apologizing for things you can't go back and change.

Don't contact him, and give him space. When he's ready, he'll come to you.

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You cannot just wait around for your ex to take you back, because he/she could easily just find someone else! Now, that is exactly why you need to act quickly to get your ex back, otherwise you are putting yourself at risk for a lifetime of heartache and regret! Here is how to pull your ex back before it's too late...

Have your friends make your ex believe that you are better off without him/her - If your ex was to hear from someone else that you are doing great, and your life is even better since the breakup, your ex will instantly feel like he/she has done something wrong. You see, what will happen is that your ex will think that he/she never made you happy when you were together, and they will feel like they were the one holding you back. Then your ex will feel guilty, and will want to prove that they can still make you happy.

Play hard to get - Believe it or not, but this is actually possible, even if your ex is not dating you. Now, the reason this will work with your ex, is because he/she loves a challenge. People want what they cannot have, first off; and secondly people want things which are harder to get. So the instant you start ignoring your ex a bit, and you begin to stop calling etc... your ex will immediately start feeling challenged to get you back.

Being happy - Since the breakup, you may have taken life very hard and become depressed. Showing this side of you to your ex, only makes you look weak and makes your ex want to run away from you. But, if you were to start acting happy, even if you find it hard, your ex will feel attracted to you again, without even realizing it! People are naturally drawn to be around those who are succeeding and simply by changing your attitude, you can make your ex feel differently about you, and you can make your ex want you again, without your ex even realizing it!

Timing is critical when getting your ex back. Ex partners often consider a rebound relationship or just casual sex to get over you. You need to act right now. What you need is a complete, step-by-step system to take your hand and show you exactly what to do next to get your ex back in 30 days or less. For the whole system and all you would ever need to know, check it out here right now: Get Back My Ex

Author's Bio: 

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