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Codependency Articles
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- Are You A Punching Bag - by Submitted on May 08, 2013 from Cindy OrtizIn some relationships, unhealthy ones to say the least, one person or the other uses their partner as a punching bag as a way of punishment; punishment for hurting them and making them unhappy. Instead of taking responsibility for their own happiness, they make you suffer. They may criticize ...
Views: 51 - Where There Is A Will There Is A Way - by Submitted on Apr 06, 2013 from Moreen DuFermontWhere There Is a Will There Is A Way The truth is that we are living in our physical bodies and have “this” one life to live. We each can only take it one day at a time! Of course, I know that this is nothing new to you. In fact, its a philosophy you’ve heard dozens of times before; ...
Views: 145(1 vote) - Breaking Free From a Toxic Environment - by Submitted on Mar 29, 2013 from Yol SwanAna (not her real name*) came to see me because she was having second thoughts about her job and relationship and was looking for direction. She had the desire to switch to a holistic career and had taken some reiki classes. She also remembered being able to see people’s auras when she was a kid ...
Views: 167(2 votes) - Are You an Enabler and What You Can Do about It. - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2013 from Darlene LancerEnabling is a term often used in the context of a relationship with an addict. It might be a drug addict (which includes an alcoholic), gambler, or compulsive shopper. Enablers suffer the effects of the addict’s behavior rather than the addict. Enabling “removes the natural consequences to the ...
Views: 275(7 votes) - Sticks, Stones, And Words Can Break Your Bones - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Dominica ApplegateI grew up hearing a statement that went like this: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Really? I think not. Words can cause a great deal of pain to anyone and especially someone who struggles with codependency. Today I’d like to discuss a little about ...
Views: 184(1 vote) - Emotional Release Techniques For A Happy Life - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Dominica ApplegateAs human beings we all need to let go sometimes in order to experience a happy life. Keeping emotions locked up within ourselves is not healthy for us or for those close to us. This is why emotional release is a necessary thing. The problem is that many people have no idea how to perform this ...
Views: 216(1 vote) - Recovery and Codependency - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Dominica ApplegateIf you’re struggling with codependency, I want you to know that codependence recovery is an important part of getting through your issues and gaining some freedom. Not everyone’s path will look the same, but committing to some sort of recovery will be most beneficial to you. Breaking the ...
Views: 207(1 vote) - Recovery from Codependency - by Submitted on Jan 21, 2013 from Darlene LancerCodependency is often thought of as a relationship problem and considered by many to be a disease. In the past, it was applied to relationships with alcoholics and drug addicts. It is a relationship problem; however, the relationship that’s the problem is not with someone else, but the ...
Views: 926(8 votes) - Ascension & Leaving The Matrix, Part I: Mayan Calendar Shift, 12-21-12 - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2013 from Zarla LeahIf you find yourself alone, bored and empty inside during the holidays, then ask God to help you to find your people, your place, your focus and activities. If you are alone, that means that the people surrounding you where you are are not the right friends for you and you have chosen to not ...
Views: 391 - Are you a CAVE Dweller? - by Submitted on Dec 21, 2012 from Debbi DickinsonThere was an extended period of time in my life where I was a CAVE dweller. We all know people that are. CAVE is an acronym for Citizens Against Virtually Everything. CAVE dwellers are the people that look at life as a glass that is half full and complain about it. They complain loudly about ...
Views: 377(1 vote) - 6 Tips for Letting Go - by Submitted on Jan 21, 2013 from Darlene LancerHave you been told, “Just let go of it,” or tell yourself, “I have to let go,” but wonder, how? I’ve asked myself that question. Sometimes you want to let go of a worry or an obsession about someone else. You may try to detach, but can't. Other times when you can’t move forward after a major ...
Views: 742(8 votes) - Boundaries and healing the self - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2012 from Nikki HowesHave you ever felt you were giving too much to others? taking on their problems or allowing them to dump their problems on you? Is it hard for you to say no or tell another person how you are feeling without guilt or shame? These may be signs that your boundaries are fuzzy and could benefit ...
Views: 402(1 vote) - The Human Magnet Syndrome – We are all Human Magnets (Excerpt from Book) - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2013 from Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed. LCPC CADCINTRODUCTION About 30 years ago, my dad joked (or so I thought was a joke): “The soul mate of your dreams is gonna become the cellmate of your nightmares.” It takes some of us decades to realize that our parents were actually a lot smarter than we gave them credit for. What I thought was just ...
Views: 565(3 votes) - ***Intimacy is Scary – Are YOU Ready? - by Submitted on Oct 21, 2012 from Dr. Erica GoodstoneMost of us believe that we want to have a loving and intimate relationship with a significant other. But we may not realize what that actually means. We may not be ready to deal with and reveal our own inner demons, those parts of our self that cause us to feel hurt, insecure, ashamed and ...
Views: 1475(5 votes) - Breaking Up Is Hard to Do - by Submitted on Oct 20, 2012 from Amy TorresSaying the words, "I want to break up," whether with respect to a marital relationship or any other committed romantic relationship, is one of the hardest things a human being ever has to do. Making the conscious choice to end one of the strongest bonds we have ever made frightens us to our ...
Views: 625(2 votes) - Are You Codependent? - by Submitted on Oct 19, 2012 from Lisa EspichAre you in a relationship with an addict? Have your attempts at helping that person failed? Do you feel powerless? Codependency is a term used when one person develops unhealthy patterns due to the involvement with another person who has the disease of addiction. Some of the negative patterns ...
Views: 578(1 vote) - When the Narcissist and Codependent Reverse Their Roles - by Submitted on Oct 15, 2012 from Sam VakninSometimes, the breakup is initiated by the long-suffering spouse or intimate partner of the narcissist or psychopath. As she develops and matures, gaining in self-confidence and a modicum of self-esteem (ironically, at the narcissist’s behest in his capacity as her “guru” and “father figure”), ...
Views: 969(1 vote) - Countering Abandonment and Separation Anxiety - by Submitted on Oct 15, 2012 from Sam VakninClinging and smothering behaviours are the unsavoury consequences of a deep-set existential, almost mortal fear of abandonment and separation. For the codependent to maintain a long-term, healthy relationship, she must first confront her anxieties head on. This can be done via psychotherapy: the ...
Views: 764(1 vote) - "I am Terrified that S/he will Abandon Me! I will Do Anything to Avoid It!" - by Submitted on Oct 15, 2012 from Sam VakninClinging and smothering behaviours are the unsavoury consequences of a deep-set existential, almost mortal fear of abandonment and separation. For the codependent to maintain a long-term, healthy relationship, she must first confront her anxieties head on. This can be done via psychotherapy: the ...
Views: 480(1 vote) - Romantic Jealousy - by Submitted on Oct 15, 2012 from Sam VakninPathological envy is not the same as romantic jealousy. These two emotions have little to do with each other. Romantic jealousy is the product of a violation of trust; a breach of romantic exclusivity of intimacy; and a denial of possession. It also involves damage to the self-esteem and ...
Views: 461(1 vote) - Stop Selling Your Love and Be You - by Submitted on Oct 14, 2012 from Dr. Erica GoodstoneStop selling your love. Be You - The Greatest Gift of All. Become a love consultant, share your love freely and openly, and watch love easily and effortlessly rebound to you. Have you ever met someone who keeps telling you how wonderful they are, how caring and loving they are, and how ...
Views: 689(1 vote) - Are You Worthy of Love? - by Submitted on Sep 23, 2012 from Dr. Erica GoodstoneThe music industry is obsessed with love. Songs about love reach #1 on the charts over and over again. But the type of love sung about is often more like compulsion, neediness, personal inadequacy, idealization of another, mystery, novelty, unavailability, codependency and actually the ...
Views: 998(2 votes) - Being Brave and Sensible by coming to Jupiter Counseling for Addiction and Abuse Treatment - by Submitted on Sep 06, 2012 from Scott McCownNot everyone who takes drugs in an addict or even likely to become one, just as not everyone who drinks alcohol is an alcoholic. In fact here are many who, notwithstanding the campaigns against both indulge in substance abuse. Students are especially fond of acquiring a skin full and making ...
Views: 570 - Reality TV Wives/ Girlfriends, and WHY Relationship Dependency is Harmful to Women - by Submitted on Aug 31, 2012 from Merissa BuryIn the light of Chad Ochocinco & Evelyn Lozada’s domestic dispute, it’s not surprising that many people are speculating the reality of their high-status relationship. According to reports, Chad, ex-player for the Miami dolphins, head butt his new wife, Evelyn, after she confronted him about a ...
Views: 847(1 vote) - Shame - The Hidden Cause of Addiction and Codependency - by Submitted on Jan 21, 2013 from Darlene LancerShame is so painful to the psyche that most people will do anything to avoid it – even though it’s a natural emotion that everyone has. It’s a physiologic response of the autonomic nervous system. You might blush, have a rapid heartbeat, break into a sweat, freeze, hang your head, slump your ...
Views: 1055(2 votes) - What Is Codependence and How Does It Affect My Life? - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2012 from Suzanne E. Harrill, M. Ed., LPCCodependence is a new word that became popular in the 1980's. It has become a buzzword and important for you to understand in becoming the person you want to be. In less aware times codependence was considered normal. To be good, perfect, compliant, agreeable, giving, and selfless was rewarded ...
Views: 951 - Navigating You & Me With Love & Compassion: Pet Peeves: Accept Or Reject? - by Submitted on Jul 16, 2012 from Ragini MichaelsEveryday Dilemma: Should I keep my own counsel and accept my partner’s unpleasant behaviors? Or, should I let him know that I reject them and want him to change? There’s something very odd about us humans. We invite others to be our intimate friends, lovers, and partners because we either ...
Views: 943 - Four Key Steps for Setting Healthy Boundaries - by Submitted on Aug 12, 2012 from Lisa EspichThroughout the first sixteen years of my marriage my husband, Dean, struggled with his addiction to alcohol, prescription pain pills, and crack cocaine. As his addiction continued to get worse, my ability to set healthy boundaries failed. This didn’t happen overnight -- it was a gradual process ...
Views: 1445(1 vote) - Navigating You And Me With Love And Compassion: Two Sweeteners for Intimate Interaction - by Submitted on May 31, 2012 from Ragini MichaelsEveryday Dilemma: Do I honor my thirst to be alone for awhile, or do I follow the longing in my heart to be together with friends and family? For years I believed intimacy meant being together with my beloveds - all the time! Everyone I knew suffered greatly from my youthfully exuberant ...
Views: 921 - Navigating You & Me With Love & Compassion: Our Dualistic Dance of Relating - by Submitted on May 31, 2012 from Ragini MichaelsThe Everyday Dilemma: Do I take care of myself now, or everyone and everything else first, including my career? Most of us truly wish to infuse our lives with love, compassion, and caring. And, you have probably been enticed by the common notion that bringing these words to life requires ...
Views: 837 - Dilemmas of Codependent Men - by Submitted on May 26, 2012 from Darlene LancerThe dilemmas of codependent men aren’t talked about. Unlike women, men don’t discuss their relationship problems with friends and family. Instead, they internalize their pain. Many are in denial, suffer in silence, or become numb to their needs and feelings. They shun attention and try to do the ...
Views: 1403(2 votes) - Three Causes of Christian Codependency - by Submitted on May 15, 2012 from Karla DowningAre you looking for help for your Christian codependency? If so, one of the things you might be wondering is what caused your codependency. In the 1980s, codependency was originally used to describe the dysfunctional patterns of family members of chemically dependent people who were also called ...
Views: 888 - Are YOU with the best Partner for YOU? - by Submitted on May 10, 2012 from Rosemary PriceAre you with the best partner for you? Whether you are married to yours, living with them or contemplating spending a lot of time with them in the future it is a good idea to know if you are truly compatible with them first. Remember that sometimes your partner shows a certain side of their ...
Views: 1033 - Why Passive Aggressive Behavior is so Hard to Grasp When You Are in Love - by Submitted on May 09, 2012 from Neil WarnerIt seems to be a silent but growing epidemic of miscommunication between people in any kind of relationships. If you read forum comments, help requests are popping up everywhere, and the hurt from miscommunication seems to be a shared national pain. Several factors have contributed to the ...
Views: 1355(1 vote) - Christian Codependency: Changing the Beliefs Underlying False Guilt - by Submitted on May 03, 2012 from Karla DowningAre you struggling with Christian codependency? If you answered yes, then you probably experience feeling guilty often in your relationships. Codependents struggle with guilt in relationships because they hold untrue beliefs about relationships. They need to change their inaccurate beliefs about ...
Views: 903 - To Trust or Mistrust - Part I - by Submitted on Jun 09, 2012 from Darlene LancerMany people claim that they trust others until they have reason not to, but when you first meet someone, you don’t know anything about their integrity or past conduct, except what they tell you. Trustworthiness is proven over time by actions, not only by words. You can get hurt by believing what ...
Views: 1178(2 votes) - Rebuilding Trust - Part II - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2012 from Darlene LancerSatisfying relationships are built on a foundation of safety and trust that you won’t be hurt physically or emotionally. Whether you trust too little or too much is influenced by your past, but once trust is broken, your sense of safety is in jeopardy. You feel insecure and may begin to question ...
Views: 1142(2 votes) - 6 Scriptural Misunderstandings of Christian Codependency - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2012 from Karla DowningThe following 6 Scriptural misunderstandings form the basis of Christian codependency. They show how inaccurate Scriptural understandings contribute to Christian codependency. The cure is an accurate understanding of what the Bible says about ourselves and how we are to value ourselves compared ...
Views: 848 - What Makes Codependency Qualify As Christian Codependency? - by Submitted on Apr 09, 2012 from Karla DowningBefore we answer the question "What makes codependency qualify as Christian codependency?" we need to understand the history of the term. In the 1980s, codependency was originally used to describe the dysfunctional patterns of family members of chemically dependent people who were also called ...
Views: 788 - When Helping Becomes Enabling: Top Ten Enabling Behaviors - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2012 from Lisa EspichTake a close look at the life of any person struggling with addiction, and you will likely find at least one family member or friend 'helping' that person. Somebody making it easier for the addict to continue in the progression of their disease. This behavior is called enabling. The problem is ...
Views: 1017 - From Co-dependence to Confidence - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2012 from Michelle MorandHow do we relate to others? One of the key aspects which influences all our interactions with others is the extent of unconscious co-dependent behaviour that exists in us. Ask yourself this question: Is there anything in my life, right now, that I feel anxious about? Do I feel responsible, in ...
Views: 873(1 vote) - Codependent Problems in Relationships - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2012 from Darlene LancerEveryone laughs when I tell them that I wrote Codependency for Dummies. But codependency is no laughing matter. It causes serious pain and affects the majority of Americans, both in and out of relationships. I know. I spent decades recovering. There are all types of codependents, including ...
Views: 1233(2 votes) - Codependents are the Majority! - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2012 from Darlene LancerThe term codependency has been around for almost four decades. Although it originally applied to spouses of alcoholics, first called co-alcoholics, research revealed that the characteristics of codependents were much more prevalent in the general population than had been imagined. In fact, they ...
Views: 982(4 votes) - Do you know the 3 causes of all relationship problems? - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2012 from Dr. Erica GoodstoneWhat do YOU believe are the 3 causes of all relationship problems? * Inadequate Money? * Not enough or too much Sex? * Friends interfering? * Family triangles and intrusions? * Poor communication? * Emotional Imbalance? Relationships are more complex than many of us care to ...
Views: 1271(2 votes) - Worry Warts Anonymous - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2012 from Patricia PottsWorry Warts Anonymous By Patricia Potts Okay, I admit it. Worrying comes natural for me. In fact I will actually admit that at times I am addicted. When I became a parent then a grandparent my worrying accelerated. When my little ones lay cuddled in the warmth of blankets. I ...
Views: 997(2 votes) - “It's All My Fault for Having Provoked Him” - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2012 from Sam VakninHow often have you heard the following phrases coupled with the most horrific physical, verbal, and psychological abuse: "It's all your fault, you made me do it" or "look what you made me do!" Abusers have alloplastic defenses and an external locus of control. This means that they tend to ...
Views: 1362(1 vote) - “I Attract Abusers Like a Magnet” - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2012 from Sam VakninMany victims of narcissists are firmly convinced that they have been "chosen" by their abusers because of their capacity to empathize, their innate sensitivity, compassion, and their ability to love and care. Indeed, these qualities tend to attract exploitative psychopathic predators who ...
Views: 1288(1 vote) - THE TRAP OF CHARM - by Submitted on Jan 23, 2012 from narcissism curedNot all Emotional Abuse is obvious. In fact, behavior that belies Emotional Abuse often starts out feeling good. Have you ever met the charmer, the smooth talker? Everything you say and do he finds adorable. Narcissists are masters of charm and sweet talk. His doting and compliments feel good. ...
Views: 1003(1 vote) - Emotional Dependency - Damages Relationships - by Submitted on Jan 02, 2012 from Sarah ChambersTo become consciously aware you that your thoughts and feelings are dysfunctional can be a life-changing realization that is transformational. Any relationship built on the foundations of unstable emotions will be dancing on the knife-edge of emotional stability. If you are experiencing an ...
Views: 2361(1 vote) - Treating Love Addiction - by Submitted on May 09, 2013 from Jim HallPeople looking for the answers to overcoming their love addiction often ask two questions, “What does recovery really mean when it comes to breaking this problem”? ... and “What are key things I need to work on to successfully recover from love addiction”? When we are new to recovery, we may ...
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