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The last couple weeks we’ve been talking about the important topic of suicide. In the United States, it’s the 10th leading cause of death. The strongest risk factor is depression. Chances are that you have had or will have a friend who is at risk. You may be reluctant to talk to him about his ... Views: 8
I was recently sitting in my favorite coffee shop, and remembering my dear friend who used to meet me there and who died not long ago. As I get older, I’m experiencing more and more loss, and so are my friends of a similar age. Those of us who survive loss still have to “keep calm ... Views: 113
Feeling lonely is painful. Often people who feel lonely exacerbate the situation by blaming themselves. Why am I lonely? Because other people don’t like me. Why don’t they like me? Because I’m a loser. It’s not hard to imagine how this internal conversation can go downhill very quickly and make ... Views: 119
Loneliness is a tricky thing to combat. Loneliness seems to beget loneliness. When you feel isolated you crawl into your shell and become more so. You feel separated from other human beings. You may have physical symptoms too, like an ache or a heaviness in your chest. It’s not a good ... Views: 116
Dear Dr. Romance:Thank you for your free articles, you have a lot of good stuff in there. A couple of the girls at work and I read your articles and get a good laugh. You're giving advice assuming that our lives are what YOU consider normal. You have a good job, make good money, live in a ... Views: 169
Dear Dr. Romance:
How can I sign up for your Happiness Tips newsletter? I want to read "The One Who Got Away." Also which article would you recommend reading in my case? I met a wonderful lady who loves dancing like I do, and for almost 8 months she has been getting her house ... Views: 229
Dear Dr. Romance:
My best friend isn't talkin with me since 2 months now. I'm frustrated. We are best friends since 3 yrs now. In feb suddenly she stopped talking. We just had a small fight as in regular nothing serious. When i asked she said she doesnt want to talk anything for ... Views: 282
While there are some needs that human beings will need to have fulfilled in order to survive, there are other needs that can go unfulfilled without leading to someone’s death. This is not to say that it won’t have an effect on someone’s wellbeing though.
For example: if one doesn’t receive ... Views: 249
The U.S. Department of Veterans’ Affairs reports that one in five combat veterans develops Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, either during or shortly after combat. The Mayo Clinic defines PTSD as having three main categories of symptoms: “re-experiencing symptoms,” “avoidance symptoms,” ... Views: 217
The U.S. Department of Veterans’ Affairs reports that one in five combat veterans develops Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, either during or shortly after combat. The Mayo Clinic defines PTSD as having three main categories of symptoms: “re-experiencing symptoms,” “avoidance symptoms,” ... Views: 219
I have a friend, Maggie, who has been my friend since 1968, and she calls me her “bestest” friend as a way of appreciating our connection. It always makes me smile, and I feel the same about her. Often, my clients have trouble learning to appreciate and trust themselves, and I think ... Views: 304
Have you ever found yourself doing the same things day after day and you begin to wonder, “Is this all there is to my life?” If you remember the movie, Groundhog Day, you get the picture. Also known as living in the comfort zone, this place can be seductive for all of us. We are often very ... Views: 310
Research conducted by Dr. Dean Ornish and others shows that the happiest and healthiest people are those who are well-connected to friends and family. But, in our mobile society, keeping friends is not always possible. Long-term friendships are wonderful and valuable, but if you dont make ... Views: 346
Tonight is my first night out with a mom's group. As a single mom, I haven't done much since having my baby. I don't really know what to expect. I know I shouldn't have any expectations, but it's hard not to when you are going into an unfamiliar situation. I don't know any of the ladies that ... Views: 316
Our connections through relationships are so important. Sometimes we get so busy that we intend on calling that special someone, or taking them to lunch, but before you know it’s the weekend and you have a full agenda.
It is easy to sit back and claim that this one didn’t return your call, or ... Views: 330
Overcoming social anxiety is hard.
Let me correct myself...
Overcoming social anxiety is next to impossible if you don’t have the right advice. If you’re suffering through anxiety knowing the most common mistakes can really make a difference when changing this part of your ... Views: 494
You know that moment when you realize you slipped up and said or did something wrong...and that feeling of dread comes over you?
Or you know you’re supposed to say something in a group but you can’t get yourself to do it...and you know others take notice of ... Views: 380
Flirting is a language of its own.
It doesn’t make sense logically.
And most guys fail at it when trying it with women.
Often times the girl will give that casual laugh of “yeah nice try”.
That direct approach to flirting rarely works, especially if you’re a shy guy. Direct approach ... Views: 385
So you want to learn how to overcome shyness. But the problem with learning how to overcome shyness is you don’t even know where to begin. Sure, some of us get advice from others like “Just be yourself” or “Just go out have fun”. But you know from experience that it’s not so simple.
Hope is ... Views: 397
Style is so important.
It’s the first signal that women pick up from you before you even get to say anything.
It’s a signal telling her if you “get it”.
If you’re with the modern times.
If you’re going to make her look bad if she hangs around you.
All sorts of things!
Women ... Views: 404
If you don’t have much experience in the dating field you might make the mistake of believing all women have the same personality types and treat them the same way.
You might already know that you have to approach different personality types with a different approach but not know what ... Views: 381
So you’re standing at the counter in the grocery store, there’s no one else in line and there’s a really cute girl at the counter.
What do you say to start a conversation?
Just saying hi usually doesn’t lead anywhere, and if you make it too obvious it’ll be embarrassing if you get ... Views: 357
How many times has it happened in your past where a date didn’t go the way you planned?
You planned out a whole romantic evening, you gave it a lot of thought, spent a lot of your time.
And surprisingly it went nowhere with the girl.
That sucks doesn’t it?
What’s worse is she didn’t ... Views: 362
Of course the answer is make new friends right? Especially if you wished you had a more active social life and you’re not social.
The reason I’m bringing up this topic is to discuss how we sabotage ourselves when it comes to the social success we want.
When you can figure out where ... Views: 346
Have you ever been in a situation where you get a girl’s number and you think everything went well, but when you get in touch with her she never returns your calls?
Suppose she wasn’t a stranger, maybe you met at a barbeque at your friend’s house.
Shouldn’t it be easier to get in touch ... Views: 351
The problem with shyness is it feels like you’ll never overcome it.
It takes a grip over you as soon you have to meet people or introduce yourself to someone.
And it grips you until the very end of the interaction.
To many of us with shyness it feels like an enormous wall that blocks us ... Views: 343
Let’s face it.
If you have shyness working against you then making conversations can be really tough.
But did you know that many great conversations can start from canned material? Meaning its stuff you planned to talk about ahead of time.
The problem is knowing what material to talk ... Views: 384
Yes, there is such a thing.
A meditation technique that helps you to overcome shyness.
It’s a meditation technique I’ve used for over 6 years and it’s helped me a great deal.
If you follow any of my articles or read about me then you know I’ve overcome shyness and gotten to the point ... Views: 373
We’ve all chased that girl in our life that caused problems for us.
To Ex-boyfriend issues.
To simply getting walked over.
By the time the relationship or interaction is over you feel exhausted and emotionally drained because you tried so hard yet it didn’t work ... Views: 414
Don’t do it!
This will save you a lot of humiliation and rejection if you just read this first.
Because women talk. And they’ll talk about how you tried to pick up on them to their friends, and if you have the same circle of friends that could mean somewhat of a ... Views: 354
I had a meeting last week with a new friend. It was only our second meeting, and I already feel like we have known each other forever. From the moment I saw her, we had something... not only is she the cutest thing ever, but we just have this synergy. We sat down and before I knew it, almost two ... Views: 350
They're so good at it they might as well host a "How To Trick A Shy Man Into Spending Money" seminar.
Now, I'm not talking about every woman. I'm talking about that particular woman who is just extra bit hotter, who has that extra bit of guys chasing her and who makes you ... Views: 406
The Circle - “Driveway Dwellers”
A few years ago when the children left home we scaled down to a new townhome. Having never lived in a townhome community before, and always benefiting from a neighborhood surrounded by long term friends and acquaintances, it was a challenge to make the ... Views: 474
How to be more outgoing has a lot to do with your environment. You’ll find that if you’re shy and socially awkward you’ll quite often be in environments that are probably low-key and something you’re familiar with. It can get very uncomfortable when you throw yourself into places like clubs and ... Views: 348
“Nice guys finish last” I’m sure many shy men can relate with this statement.
I’ve seen over the years that shy men have an air of “I’ll always be nice no matter what.” They are easily forgiving of others regardless of what the situation is.
Overly NICE guys also tend to remember things ... Views: 344
Rejection is pretty hard on the soul.
It can make you feel unwanted, lonely and frustrated.
It doesn't matter if you’re the average Joe or a big shot executive. It hurts just the same; and with today’s fast paced society the world can feel extra punishing.
When you can ... Views: 367
When you are comfortable with yourself you release all expectations of others. I say this in part because Valentine’s Day is approaching and there will be many hearts that get broken because they expect others to fulfill their wishes. There is an easy evaluation of this. If you squeeze a ... Views: 375
What will be my Valentine? Yes, you read that right!
We usually ask, Who will be my Valentine? - which can bring up a myriad of uncomfortable answers.
For those who are in a romantic relationship, we tend to think romance is a ‘shoe in’. Wait a minute – is it? Take a look at your ... Views: 423
Hello out there.
There's a news story that came out a little while ago that I have been reflecting on. I've attached the link for you if you'd like to check it out.
I wanted to share with you the thoughts that it brought up for me about the ... Views: 491
The Myth of Elderly Care
There has been much discussion about the rising cost of care for our aging population. We read about peoples’ life savings being swallowed up and leaving incapacitated pensioners without support at a time when they are least able to negotiate for better ... Views: 338
If human beings were inherently independent, it wouldn’t matter if someone had relationships with other people; as they would be able to just carry on with their life. But as human beings and everything else on this planet is interdependent, it means that relationships play a vital part in ... Views: 382
I was on the internet the other day having a little read, you know what it’s like. You start reading something, click a link to something else and then for the next 30 min you are going link to link reading about various different things!
Well during one of these sessions I stumbled across ... Views: 495
As children we’re taught to never talk to strangers, but as we age it seems like this advice becomes less and less applicable. By time we’re adults strong social skills are a necessity for a successful life; the tables turn, yet many of us never catch up and develop these abilities. Talking to a ... Views: 522
In the past we’ve discussed the importance of feeling loved and accepted. As humans we have an innate psychological need to feel like we belong, no matter the situation. That being said, a lack of acceptance can pose some serious hindrances to a healthy and productive life.
People in this ... Views: 476
“Purebred” schizoids shrug off their disorder: they simply don’t like being around people and they resent the pathologizing of their lifestyle “choice” to remain aloof and alone. They consider the diagnosis of Schizoid Personality Disorder to be spurious, a mere reflection of current social ... Views: 500
Throughout one’s life, they are naturally going to meet people they feel close to and people they don’t. And the people who they don’t feel close to are going to be in the majority. Special connections are going to be rare and this is because one won’t meet people like this all of the time.
... Views: 432
While someone can be by themselves, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will feel lonely. To be on their own and away from others could be something that they enjoy; with one feeling energised by it.
However, there are other people who can be by themselves and this makes them feel ... Views: 509
It’s that wonderful time of year again when the holidays fill us with anticipation and excitement. It’s also a time when some folks are barely putting one foot in front of the other due to illness or sadness. You probably know someone who could use a “leg up” during the holidays.
Here are ... Views: 913
When one thinks about the people in their life who support them, their friends will typically come to mind. Ideally, these will be the people who one can turn to for advice, encouragement and acceptance for instance.
So one is able to be themselves around them and doesn’t feel the need to ... Views: 424
Dealing with the holidays while you are grieving for a loved one can be stressful and emotionally exhausting. For most of us the holiday season magnifies the absence of the person lost. You may feel that long-held traditions can never be the same or could be awkward. It can be sad shopping for ... Views: 236