Passive Aggressive Behaviour.

I am becoming more and more aware that in my past I was a master at passive aggressive behaviour. I played head games with people to try and make them do things that I wanted them to do.

The reason for this awareness is because for well over the last year it has been being done to me. First, it happened on my birthday, when I was still in the hospital for cancer treatment. It was a lonely time. Yes, my wife visited me everyday that she could and when she wasn’t there we talked by phone.

Anyway, on that day I got an e-mail from a member of my birth family. They said happy birthday, said I’m probably going through a lot and said they never realized how disappointed I was in them. Then I was told to just get over it.

Just get over a childhood of abuse – mentally, physically, and sexually – just get over it. I called this member twice after my brothers death and both times got an answering machine. Both times I left my phone number. Both times, I never received a return call. Disappointed? Why would they say that? SMH! Just get over it! SMH!

Now, I’ve run into a punk. A kid who is 20 years younger than me but acts like he is built like Rocky and smarter than Einstein. I’ve called him out on some of his stories… fantasies… whatever you want to call them… how about just lies? And every time I do call him out, he acts like a spoiled child. Throwing temper tantrums, slamming doors and cursing.

His latest one involved a third person. It happened where I worked. A customer asked for permission to leave a possession of his for a moment while he took care of business. Without going into detail because I don’t want to get my company or his company in trouble, I gave this gentleman permission to do so.

Well this kid saw what I did and quickly was against it, until I explained that I talked to the guy and everything is cool. I could tell that he didn’t like that I handled it logically and quite well. So within a few minutes, he said another guy can’t do anything because what I did made everyone else a captive until this guy returned. I looked outside and no one was near the location and no one seemed out of place with it all.

A half hour past and he said I could be in trouble for giving this permission. As he said it, a voice from about 20 feet away said thanks to me. He was there having a cigarette with friends. Now this punk made it sound like he gave the permission. Back to SMH.

Recognizing this behaviour has shown me that I can be myself and be OK. I don’t need to please others or cry for their acceptance, which is all this 40 year old child craves.