Self Improvement Site
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- True Self: Can Someone Believe That They Have To Hide Their True Self In Order To Be Loved? - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to go for a drive, they would be able to go wherever they wanted. So, if they wanted to go left, they could go left, and, if they wanted to go right, they could go right. Quite simply, they would have the ability to go wherever suited them and to adapt if it wasn’t possible for ...
Views: 178 - Self-Activation: Can Childhood Trauma Stop Someone From Being Able To Activate Themselves? - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to hear the term “self-activation”, they could wonder what it actually means. One way to understand this would be for them to imagine that they have a vacuum cleaner that can either be pushed around a room or it can go around a room by itself. When it is being pushed around a ...
Views: 177 - Loss: Can Someone Feel Guilty After A Parent Has Passed On? - by Submitted on Jul 05, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter having recently lost a parent, someone could find that they are now experiencing a number of different feelings. There can also be a sense of shock around what has happened, with them finding it hard to accept that they will never see this parent again. When it comes to how they feel, ...
Views: 175 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother Enmeshed Man Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperOne thing that a man could find, that’s if he was to get into a relationship, is that he is out of touch with how he feels. Prior to this, it might not have even occurred to him that he was this way. This would have just been what was normal and he may have been this way for as long as he can ...
Views: 174 - Mother Wounds: Can It Be Hard For A Man To Speak Up In A Relationship If He Had An Emotionally Unavailable Mother? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNow that a man is in a relationship, he may find that he has the tendency to swallow his words and not to express how he really feels when he is with his partner. In fact, he might not even be aware of how he feels a lot of the time. As a result of this, it is not going to be possible for him ...
Views: 174 - Resilience: Can Childhood Trauma Make It Hard For Someone To Handle Setbacks? - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIt could be said that no matter who someone is, there are going to be moments in their life when something won’t go to plan. So, instead of being able to go from A to B, they will end up going from A to A. For whatever reason, they will have come up against a hurdle and it won’t be possible ...
Views: 174 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Carry A Sense Of Violation If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Oct 23, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man was to take a step back and reflect on his life, he may see that he is often walked over and treated badly by others. There may have been moments when he thinks that the world is against him. Now, this could be something that he only experiences when he is in the company of other ...
Views: 173 - Grief: Can Someone Carry A Lot Of Grief If They Experienced Development Trauma? - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they often feel down and depressed. If they are not in this shut down state and they are in touch with how they feel, they could typically feel very sad. So, being out of touch with how they feel is not going ...
Views: 173 - Human Contact: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their Need For Human Contact? - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone will be an interdependent human being, it doesn’t mean that they will act like one. Instead, they can be happy spending time by themselves and rarely if ever be or reach out to others. If they are around others, it could be a sign that they are at work or out shopping. ...
Views: 173 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Doesn’t A Mother-Enmeshed Man Have Boundaries? - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperOne of the things that can soon stand out, when it comes to a man whose whole life practically revolves around his mother, is that he acts as though he is purely an extension of her. As opposed to being a separate from her, then, he will be a part of her that is not physically attached to ...
Views: 173 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Is It Hard For A Mother-Enmeshed Man To Break Out Of His Mother’s Mirror? - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperDeep down, a mother-enmeshed man will want to be in tune with and to freely express himself. However, although this is so, he will feel compelled to focus on his mother needs and to behave how she wants him to behave. He will then appear to have the ability to behave how he wants to behave, ...
Views: 173 - Relationships: Can Someone’s Childhood Set Them Up To Believe That It Is Their Responsibility To Save Others? - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat could be normal is for someone to continually end up with people who are unable to truly be there for them. When they are in a relationship, then, it could be as though they are with a child as opposed to an adult. There is a chance that they are currently in a relationship with someone ...
Views: 173 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Mans Fear Of Being Harmed Stop Him From Being Able To Break Away? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhen it comes to a man who is unable to live his own life, due to being emotionally entangled with his mother, it can seem as though it is due to what took place in relation to his mother very early on. So, at this stage of his life, most likely, his mother would have used him to meet some of ...
Views: 172 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone Carry A Wounded Infant If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone is an adult and thus their childhood will be well and truly behind them, it doesn’t mean that this is actually the case. Of course, they will no longer be a toddler, infant or even a child; that will be clear from their appearance. But, while this will be clear from the ...
Views: 171 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Would a Mother Enmeshed Man Have Trouble Identifying His Needs And Feelings? - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperEven though a man will have his own needs and feelings, he could generally be out of touch with what is taking place within him. These parts, along with his desires and preferences, will be connected to his true self. Thus, if he is out of touch with what is going on within him and is ...
Views: 171 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Are The Real Needs Of A Mother-Enmeshed Being Covered Up By His Unmet Childhood Needs? - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFor some people, it will be hard to understand why a man would be overly focused on his mother’s life and overlook his own life in the process. This will mean that he will do what he can to take care of her needs and spend very little time taking care of his own needs. Now, this is not to say ...
Views: 171 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Man’s Mother Have A Fear Of Being Abandoned? - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he is overly involved with his mother and neglects his own life, it could be said that while one of them will be getting something from this arrangement the other person won’t be. The man’s mother will have someone there to take care of her needs and her son, the ...
Views: 171 - Relationships: Do Relationships Allow Someone To Come Into Contact With Their Unconscious Mind? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperHuman beings have both a conscious and an unconscious mind; however, the latter is largely overlooked. Not only does mainstream society ignore this mind but a lot of people in the helping professions, those who are doing what they can to help peoples “mental health”, also do the same ...
Views: 171 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Does Mother Enmeshed Man Want To Rescue His Mother? - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhile both her son and his mother will be adults, he can have the need to essentially save his mother. It then won’t matter if he is not a doctor or a therapist, for instance, as he will do what he can to resolve all her issues. Now, this could mean that his mother is deeply unwell and has ...
Views: 170 - Mother-Enmeshed Man: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Develop A Relationship With Himself? - by Submitted on Jul 10, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man will have a relationship with his mother, if this could be called a relationship, he won’t have much of a relationship with himself. This means that he won’t be aware of most of his needs and is unlikely to value who he is. He will spend a lot of time in his head and being ...
Views: 170 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Realise That His Needs Are Important? - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFor a man who is emotionally entangled with his mother, it will be normal for him to focus on her needs. This is likely to mean that he won’t even be aware of a lot of his own needs. His mother’s needs are then going to consume him and it won’t occur to him that he is out of touch with ...
Views: 170 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Has A Mother-Enmeshed Mans Ability To Love Been Taken Away? - by Submitted on Jul 02, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhat a man could find, if he was to get into a relationship, is that it is difficult for him to connect to how he feels and to experience love. If this is so, he could wonder if he has the ability to feel and to feel love in his heart. Then again, he could come to the conclusion that he is ...
Views: 170 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Can It Be Harder For A Man To Break Away From His Mother If She Becomes Ill? - by Submitted on Jun 26, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is focused on his mother and is not living his own life, he might not even realise that this is the case. As he was probably trained to be there for her from a very young age, it is not going to be a surprise if it doesn’t occur to him that he is out of alignment with himself and is not ...
Views: 169 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Fear Leaving His Mothers World? - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he is emotionally entangled with his mother, it is likely to stop him from living his own life. Instead of being aware of his own needs and doing what he can to meet them, he is likely to be focused on his mother's needs and do what he can to meet them. As a ...
Views: 169 - Receiving: Can Someone Find It Hard To Receive If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Dec 05, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to take a step back and reflect on their life, what they may find is that it is often hard for them to receive what they need to survive, let alone thrive. So, when it comes to money, they may rarely have enough. Keeping a roof over their head is then going to be a challenge ...
Views: 169 - Critical Thinking: Does Humanity Need To Change Their Inner World In Order To Change Their Outer World? - by Submitted on Mar 25, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to think about changing the world, what could come to mind are all the things that they could do. This could be seen as the only way for them to have an impact on what is taking place out there. Sitting around and waiting for things to change could be seen as the only other ...
Views: 168 - Repressed Pain: Can The Mind Cause Problems When Someone Is Carrying Repressed Pain? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn today’s world, a lot is said about physical and mental problems, and this is a far cry from how things used to be. In the past, a lot used to be said about the former whilst very little was said about the latter. Taking this into account, it could be said that this shows how far society ...
Views: 168 - Repressed Pain: Does Someone’s Pain Disappear Once It Has Been Removed From Their Conscious Awareness? - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn today’s world, someone is often thought to begin and end with their conscious mind. Other than their physical body, then, this will be seen as who they are and there won’t be another part of them. Due to this, if someone’s “mental health” is not in a good way and they were to reach out to ...
Views: 168 - Emotionally Shut Down: Is Childhood Trauma The Reason Why Someone Is Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Aug 31, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough human beings are emotional beings, it wouldn’t be right to say that every human being on the planet comes across as one. There are those who are in tune with how they feel and there are those who are typically out of touch with how they feel. Consequently, there are those who appear ...
Views: 167 - I Ran A Half Marathon - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperTowards the end of September, whilst I was out I came across a sign that said there would be a half marathon taking place soon and, on this day, the road would be closed. When I saw the sign, it was just under three days until the race. This event pulled me in and I instantly started to think ...
Views: 167 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Did A Man’s Father Play A Part In Why He Didn’t Develop Boundaries? - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man spends a lot of time doing things for and focusing on his mother, it is likely to mean that he won’t have much of a life. To use an analogy: it will be like he has lent a beam to another person to keep their house in place. As a result of this, his house will be without the support ...
Views: 167 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother Enmeshed Man Trapped In His Mother’s World? - by Submitted on Jul 03, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperEven if a man is emotionally entangled with his mother, he will appear to be free to live his own life. Therefore, it will be hard for some people to accept that he doesn’t feel free deep down. He will be a separate adult but he will feel as though he is nothing more than an extension of ...
Views: 167 - Consciousness: Does A Large Part Of Humanity Feel Comfortable Being Enslaved? - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAt the height of the pandemic, it wasn’t possible for a lot of people to live as they usually would. This was a time when so many people had to isolate themselves from others and were only able to go out for the basics and perhaps to work, that’s if they were a key worker, for instance. As ...
Views: 166 - Critical Thinking: Can Someone Be Overly Fearful Of The Coronavirus If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough there are some people who have done their best to carry on as normal since the arrival of the contagion, there are others who have been unable to do so. For someone in the second position, it might not matter if the restrictions have been eased where they live. They may have ...
Views: 166 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Sabotage His Life If He Has The Need To Be Loyal To His Father? - by Submitted on May 17, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is finding it hard to move forward in life, he might find it hard to believe that this could be due to what took place during his early years. As far as he is concerned, what took place at this stage of his life could be in the past and that’s the end of it. The reason why his life ...
Views: 166 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Does A Mother Enmeshed Man Have A Fear of Being Seen? - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man spends most of his life doing what he can to please others and his mother, in particular, it is going to mean that he is primarily focused on what is going on without. What is taking place within is rarely, if ever, going to something that he is aware of. This is likely to mean that ...
Views: 166 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Experience A Conflict Between His Thoughts And Feelings? - by Submitted on Sep 08, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFor as long as a man, who is entangled with his mother, is not aware of the fact that he is this way, he is likely to be out of touch with most of his needs and feelings. By being this way, he will have no trouble being there for his mother and focusing on her needs. This is likely to just be ...
Views: 166 - Sense Of Safety: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Believe That It Is Not Safe Enough For Them To Exist? - by Submitted on Mar 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone could live somewhere that is relatively safe and they are therefore free to express themselves, it doesn’t mean that this will take place. They could often isolate themselves from others. When they are around others they could typically do what they can please them, ...
Views: 166 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Has A Mother-Enmeshed Mans True Self Gone Into Hiding? - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIn order for a man to live a life that is in alignment with who he is, he will need to be connected with his true self and feel comfortable expressing who he is. When it comes to his true self, this will relate to his needs, feelings and wants and most of these will be found in his ...
Views: 165 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Feel Guilty For Putting His Needs First? - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough a man will have his own needs to meet, he could spend most of his time meeting his mother’s needs. As a result of this, he is going to neglect most, if not all of his own needs. However, this is something that can take place without him even being aware of the fact that he is largely ...
Views: 165 - Rescued: Can Someone Have The Need To Be Rescued If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone may not realise that they have the need to be rescued, this is something that they would soon see if they were able to reflect on their life. By doing this, the evidence would start to appear. Now, it could seem strange how someone could be in this position and not be aware ...
Views: 165 - Father Wounds: Can Man Associate Self-Assertion With Death If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperA man may find that it is difficult for him to stand his ground and to stop others from walking over him. Then again, he might not even get to this point and could simply allow other people to cross his boundaries. Once this has taken place, he could end up feeling deeply frustrated and fed ...
Views: 164 - Inner Conflict: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Experience A Lot Of Inner Conflict? - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNaturally, if someone is carrying a deeply wounded infant inside them, it is going to be a challenge for them to fulfil their adult needs. In a lot of cases, this part of them is going to stop them from having what they truly desire. However, although this is what will be taking place, they ...
Views: 164 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Did A Man’s Father Play A Part In Why He Was Unable To Emotionally Separate From His Mother? - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he is focused on his mother’s needs and does what he can to please her, it is likely to show that he is emotionally entangled with her. This will mean that although he is physically separate from her, he won’t be emotionally separate from her. At an emotional ...
Views: 164 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Fear Women If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man was to step back and reflect on his life, he may see that he generally finds it hard to be himself around women. There are then going to be moments when this is not the case, but this will be the exception as opposed to the rule. Upon closer inspection, he may see that this is how ...
Views: 164 - Mother-Enmeshed Man: Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Need To Drop His Nice Guy Mask? - by Submitted on Jul 22, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he focuses on his mother’s needs and neglects most of his own, he is unlikely to have a strong connection with his own feelings. What this comes down to is that he will probably be out of touch with his own body, which is where most of his needs and feelings will ...
Views: 164 - Relationships: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Lose Themselves Around Others? - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone will be an individual, with their own needs and feelings, when they are around others they could have the tendency to lose touch with these inner aspects. As a result of this, they will act more like an extension of others. Instead of expressing who they are, then, their true ...
Views: 164 - Self-Blame: Can Someone Have The Tendency To Engage In Self-Blame If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn general, someone’s inner world could be somewhere that is not very harmonious. If so, they might rarely experience positive feelings and find it hard to feel good about themselves. To use an analogy: their inner world can be like the inside of a house that is in a state of decay. ...
Views: 164 - Self-Hate: Can Someone Hate Themselves If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on May 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they struggle to feel good about themselves, their life is likely to be far harder than it needs to be. For one thing, they are seldom going to experience positive feelings. As a result of this, they are likely to spend a lot of time feeling low and they ...
Views: 163 - Self-Sabotage: Why Is It Hard For Someone To Realise That They Are Sabotaging Their Life? - by Submitted on May 09, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone hasn’t been able to move forward in at least one area of their life, they could believe that it is due to what is going on “out there”. What is taking place in the external world is then going to be the reason why their life is the way that it is. This can be backed up by the fact ...
Views: 163