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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- Shut Down: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Be In A Shut Down State? - by Submitted on Sep 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn order to truly embrace life, someone will need to have a strong connection with their body and be able to feel. By having this connection and this ability, they will be able to take life in and receive. However, although being this way will be essential when it comes to living a fulfilling ...
Views: 36 - “What’s Wrong With You?!” - by Submitted on Sep 06, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was out the other day, I ended up hearing a child scream whilst I was reading a book. The child, along with both of their parents, was right behind me so I couldn’t help but hear. At first, I started to wonder when the noise would stop as I was finding it hard to concentrate. Sooner or ...
Views: 36 - Child Abuse: Would An Abusive Parent Fall Apart If They Acknowledged How Abusive They Were? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter suffering for many, many years, someone may come to see that they were mistreated during their early years. Through having this understanding, it will start to become clear why they are experiencing life in this way. Now, while having this understanding won’t mean that their life will ...
Views: 35 - Child Abuse: Would An Abusive Parent Fall Apart If They Acknowledged How Abusive They Were? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter suffering for many, many years, someone may come to see that they were mistreated during their early years. Through having this understanding, it will start to become clear why they are experiencing life in this way. Now, while having this understanding won’t mean that their life will ...
Views: 34 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Have The Need To Always Be On The Go If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Oct 07, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to spend most of their waking hours on the go. So, from morning until night, they are seldom going to just be, and, even if they were to sit down, they might not be able to simply relax. To settle themselves down, they might need to have something to drink or ...
Views: 34 - Early Deprivation: Does Someone Engage In Repetition Compulsion To Avoid Their Emotional Truth? - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were able to step back and reflect on their life, is that they continually end up in situations where they feel unloved, unwanted and even invisible. Now, this could mean that they have had a number of relationships that have been anything but fulfilling. But, ...
Views: 34 - False Self: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Believe That They Need To Hide Themselves To Survive? - by Submitted on Sep 27, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was able to step back and reflect on how they typically experience life, what may soon stand out is that they automatically hide a number of their needs and feelings. As a result of this, what is really going on for them is going to be covered up. This is going to mean that they ...
Views: 34 - Emotionally Shut Down: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Be An Unfeeling Human Being? - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperThroughout someone’s early years, they may have been hurt by one or both of their parents. This may have meant that they were abused in a variety of different ways and were neglected, which would have deprived them of the love that they needed. But, as they were powerless and totally ...
Views: 33 - False Self: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Create A Fearful False Self? - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone can live in an environment that is relatively safe and be free to express themselves, it doesn’t mean that they will feel safe or freely express themselves. Still, this might not be something that they are consciously aware of. If they are not consciously aware of what is ...
Views: 33 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Have The Need To Be Perfect If They Had A Highly Critical Parent? - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was brought up in an environment that was extremely conditional and there was very little love on offer, it doesn’t mean that this is something that they will be aware of now that they are an adult. In fact, if they were to think about this stage of their life, they might not be able ...
Views: 32 - Depression: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Be Depressed As An Adult? - by Submitted on Oct 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperUp until recently, someone may have typically been full of life and taken life by the horns, to so speak. But, after something has taken place, they could have very little if any energy and have just about lost all their drive to do anything. As a result of this, if they were to reach out for ...
Views: 31 - Fame: Can Early Deprivation Give Someone The Need To Be Famous? - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNowadays, it is not uncommon for someone to have a strong need to be known by a lot of people. Thanks, in a part, to modern-day technology, there is a myriad of different ways in which someone can achieve this goal. However, in the past being known by a lot of people was largely seen as ...
Views: 31 - Love: Can Early Deprivation Give Someone The Need To Struggle For Love? - by Submitted on Oct 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat is not uncommon is for someone to continually end up in relationships with people who are unable to be there for them. Ending up with people who are ‘emotionally unavailable’ is then going to be the norm. The outcome of this is that when they have been in a relationship, they will have ...
Views: 31 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Is A Mother-Enmeshed Man Imprisoned By His Own Lack Of Development? - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man was brought up to be there for his mother and to take care of a number of her needs, it probably wouldn’t have occurred to her that he was an individual who had his own needs and, over time, his own life to lead. Of course, when he was born, it is likely to have occurred to her that he ...
Views: 31 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Fear Women If He Had A Cruel Mother? - by Submitted on Oct 14, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperMost if not all of the experiences that a man had during his formative years might have been forgotten about by his conscious mind. Therefore, most of what took place during this stage of his life could be a mystery. Nevertheless, while this might be the case, it doesn’t mean that what took ...
Views: 30 - Emotional Self: Can Someone Be Out Of Touch With Their Emotional Self If Their Parents Were Emotionally Shut Down? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperNow that someone is an adult, what they might notice is that they don’t have a strong connection with their feelings. In general, they might not know how they feel and be in a disconnected state. But, even if they do experience a feeling or a number of feelings, it doesn’t mean that they will ...
Views: 29 - “Until You Make The Unconscious Conscious, It Will Direct Your Life And You Will Call It Fate” - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn today’s world, it is typically as though someone begins and ends with their conscious mind. Not only this, it is as though what is taking place inside their inner world has very little if any effect on their outer world. When it comes to the self-development world, however, it is often ...
Views: 29 - Child Abuse: Can Someone Carry A Lot Of Hurt If They Were Abused As A Child? - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone can be carrying a lot of pain, it doesn’t mean that they will realise this. The reason for this is that their brain can generally keep this pain out of their conscious awareness. Along with this, there can be a number of things that they will do, secondary defences, to keep ...
Views: 28 - Early Deprivation: Does Someone Need To Face The Pain Of Being Unloved In Order To Heal? - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone missed out on the love that they needed in order to grow and develop very early on, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of this. Most of what took place during this stage of their life could be a mystery to them. However, even if this is the case, it doesn’t mean that this ...
Views: 25 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Struggle To Be Loved By A Woman If His Mother Was Unable To Love Him? - by Submitted on Oct 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperRight now, a man could be in a relationship with a woman who is not really interested in him. Or, if he is not in a relationship with a woman like this, he could be dating or seeing a woman who is. Consequently, he is going to be into or really into her but she is not going to feel the same ...
Views: 25 - False Self: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Hide How They Feel? - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperFor someone to have deeper connections with others, they will need to share how they feel. If they were to purely share what they have been doing and their views, for instance, this wouldn’t take place. This is not to say that being this way wouldn’t allow them to form connections with ...
Views: 24 - Self Sabotage: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Sabotage Their Life? - by Submitted on Oct 16, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that at least one area of their life is not going as they would like it to go. This could be an area of their life that they have tried to change for a very long time. But, no matter what they have done, they might ...
Views: 24 - Self-Alienation: Can Someone Be A Stranger To Themselves If They Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Oct 19, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperFor someone to live a fulfilling life, they will need to be connected to their body and be in touch with their needs and feelings. The reason for this is that by being connected to themselves, they will be able to take life in, and this connection will provide them with the guidance that they ...
Views: 24 - Child Abuse: Can Someone End Up Feeling Guilty After They Have Spoken To Their Abusive Parents? - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was mistreated during their early years by one or both of their parents, it could be said that the ideal would be for what they went through to be acknowledged by them. What this would do is allow them to receive the validation that they deserve and play a part in them being able to ...
Views: 23 - Self-Assertion: Can Developmental Trauma Stop Someone From Being Able To Assert Themselves? - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone can assert themselves, they will have no trouble standing their ground and saying no. Along with this, if they want to do something, it won’t typically be a challenge for them to do it. Having this ability will allow them to both protect and express themselves. Thanks to this, ...
Views: 23 - False Self: Can A Man Pretend To Be A Man If He Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Oct 11, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIn today’s world, there are a number of different views when it comes to what it means to be a man. For some, being a man will involve being highly masculine and not very feminine. This is likely to mean that he will need to have a muscular physique, be mentally strong, be able to lead ...
Views: 22 - Feelings: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Hide Their Feelings? - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to hide how they really feel. As a result of this, the people in their life are unlikely to be aware of what is truly going on for them. However, due to how good they are at hiding how they feel, there can be no reason for these people to realise this. There ...
Views: 22 - Mother-Enmeshed Men: Why Can’t A Mother-Enmeshed Man Accept That He Is Overly Focused on His Mother? - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he spends a lot of time doing things for his mother and very little time doing things for himself, this might be something that he is aware of. Being this way will allow him to do what he needs to do to gradually change his life. This might have been something ...
Views: 22 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Feel Worthless If He Had An Abusive Mother? - by Submitted on Oct 21, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man was to step back and reflect on how he experiences life, what could soon stand out is that he doesn’t feel as though he has any value. He could see how this has held him back when it comes to his career and his relationships with the opposite sex. He might have continually made one ...
Views: 21 - Mother Wounds: Can Developmental Trauma Cause A Man To Put Women On A Pedestal? - by Submitted on Oct 22, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen a man is around certain women, it might be hard for him to keep it together, so to speak. What this can mean is that during this time, he ends up feeling anxious and can’t function as he normally would. This is likely to be an experience that he has when he is around a woman to who he is ...
Views: 20 - Mother-Enmeshed Man: Can A Mother-Enmeshed Man Focus On His Mother To Please His Father? - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is in a position where he spends a lot of time doing things for his mother and neglects himself in the process, it could be said that this illustrates that he has a strong need to please her. After all, she is going to be the person who he is doing so much for. Based on this, if he ...
Views: 20 - Child Abuse: Can Child Abuse Cause Someone To Live In Their Head? - by Submitted on Oct 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone doesn’t have a strong connection with their body, they are not going to be in touch with a big part of them. It is this part of them that a number of their needs and feelings will be found. Taking this into account, not having a strong connection with this part of them is going to ...
Views: 19 - Unwanted: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Feel Unwanted? - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone wasn’t treated like they were wanted during their formative years, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this now that they are an adult. Yet, if this is not something that they are aware of, what took place is still likely to have a big impact on how they experience ...
Views: 19 - Self-Pathologizing: Can Someone Pathologize Themselves If They Have Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they are finding it hard to handle life, they could believe that there is something inherently wrong with them. They could often see themselves as useless, incapable and even stupid. Unlike perhaps the people in their life, who have it together or at the very ...
Views: 18 - Father Wounds: Can A Man Reject His Feminine Aspect If He Had An Abusive Father? - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperOn one side, a man will have a masculine aspect, and, on the other, he will have a feminine aspect. But, although he will have two sides to this nature, it doesn’t mean that this is something that will stand out. He could generally come across as though he is only made up of the masculine ...
Views: 17 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have The Need To Possess A Woman If He Had An Unavailable Mother? - by Submitted on Nov 02, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAfter being with a man for a little while, a woman could feel as though he is too much for her to handle. This is because she could feel controlled and as if her ability to freely express herself has been taken away. However, there is a strong chance that she didn’t feel this way in the ...
Views: 17 - Needs: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Believe That Their Needs Won’t Be Met? - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone will have a number of needs, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of all of them. As a result of this, it is not going to be possible for them to meet all their needs. By living in this way, they are going to be depriving themselves of a lot of what they need. They can ...
Views: 16 - Mother Wounds: Can Early Neglect Cause A Man To Fear Being Seen By A Woman? - by Submitted on Nov 05, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man fears being seen by a woman, it doesn’t mean that he will realise this. But, even if he is not consciously aware of this, what he fears is still going to have an effect on how he experiences life. The reason why he is not aware of what is going on is that he could be out of touch ...
Views: 15 - Child Abuse: Why Can’t An Abusive Parent Acknowledge That They Were Abusive? - by Submitted on Nov 09, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was abused by at least one of their parents during their formative years, they might have a strong need to talk to them about it. However, it might have taken them a while to realise that this stage of their life wasn’t very nurturing. This is because their brain will have blocked ...
Views: 13 - Relationships: Can Developmental Trauma Take Away Someone’s Desire To Attach To Others? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperJust because someone is an interdependent human being, it doesn’t mean that they will act like one. They can spend a lot of time by themselves and have very little if any interest in being around others. This is not to say that they won’t have any friends but it is likely that they won’t be ...
Views: 13 - Emotional Self: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their Emotional Self? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they are typically out of touch with how they feel, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of this. But, if this is how they how been for quite some time, there will be no reason for it to stand out. And, as they are likely to live in a society that is full ...
Views: 12 - Being Seen: Can Someone Have The Need To Stay In The Background If They Had A Verbally Abusive Parent? - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to watch a film, they might soon find that there is the main actor and then there are a number of supporting actors. Once the film has come to an end, what may stand out, if they were to reflect on their own life, is that they have a lot in common with a supporting actor. The ...
Views: 11 - Inner Security: Can Early Deprivation Stop Someone From Developing Inner Security? - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for someone to feel all at sea internally or to be in a shut down state and unable to feel anything. Experiencing life in this way is likely to make it hard for them to appreciate their time on this planet. Due to how unstable they often feel, then, their need to feel ...
Views: 11 - Survival: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Feel As Though Their Survival Is Constantly Under Threat? - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone can live a life where they often feel as though they are going to die, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. However, if they are not aware of this, they are still likely to suffer. What can be normal is for them to experience a lot of anxiety and ...
Views: 11 - Human Contact: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To See Human Contact As A Threat To Their Survival? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAs someone is an interdependent human being, it is going to mean that it is important for them to experience human contact. This is something that will have a positive effect on their wellbeing. Nonetheless, although this is the case, it doesn’t mean that they will experience a great deal of ...
Views: 9 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have A Strong Need To Be Seen By Women If He Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperA man could put a lot of effort into his appearance, with this being a way for him to receive a woman’s attention. This can mean that he spends a lot of time exercising, a lot of his money on clothes and is often at bars and clubs. When he receives attention from a woman who he finds ...
Views: 9 - Mother Wounds: Can A Man Have A Strong Need To Be Seen By Women If He Experienced Early Deprivation? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperA man could put a lot of effort into his appearance, with this being a way for him to receive a woman’s attention. This can mean that he spends a lot of time exercising, a lot of his money on clothes and is often at bars and clubs. When he receives attention from a woman who he finds ...
Views: 9 - Anxiety: Can Unmet Developmental Needs Play A Part In Why Someone Feels Anxious? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperThere are those who experience anxiety from time to time and those who more or less always feel anxious. When someone can relate to the latter, they might want to lose the ability to be anxious. This may show that they have experienced life in this for a few months or a number of years. But, ...
Views: 8 - Emotional Problems: Can A Man Feel Isolated If He Has Mental And Emotional Problems? - by Submitted on Nov 18, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is not in a good way, it doesn’t mean that they will end up reaching out for the support that he needs. He might not even share what is going on for him with his friends or family, for instance. As a result of this, he could have a number of people in his life that would be happy to ...
Views: 6 - Anger Problems: Can A Man Use Anger To Mask His Hurt? - by Submitted on Nov 20, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhat can be normal is for a man to feel angry and this could be something that the people in his life are only too aware of. The reason for this is that he could often come across as intense and rude. It might go further, though, as there could be moments when he is violent and destroys ...
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